One Does Experiment - Chapter 2 - Teaser
Some Yusuke-Kuwabara banter, in which I shamelessly steal a line from Lanipator (though I will credit him when I update, just like I have here). If you're curious about some odd things bolded, it's so that I remember to go back and consider a less redundant alternative for one of the phrases.
Anyway:
“Come on, it can’t be that bad.”
“Urameshi, you didn’t even make it to high school; don’t you dare tell me what is or what isn’t ‘that bad.’” Yusuke countered the insult with a casual flip of The Bird. “Nice,” Kuwabara said dryly. “This lab sucks ass. It’s too long, most of it’s totally irrelevant, and at the end they make us answer an ass-load of questions and about half of them don’t even match up with the crap we did in the lab. Bottom line: it’s STUPID. And the brainiacs I’m with aren’t much help at all. Kaito’s about as lost as I am-”
“And you were afraid he’d pull a mental bitch-slap on you, ‘you dolt.’”
Kuwabara returned The Bird. “And Kurama-well, ‘Shuichi’ at school-doesn’t pay as much attention as he probably should-”
“Wait, you’re trying to say Kurama’s the slacker?”
“Quit interrupting me, it’s rude! And no, I’m not saying he’s a slacker…” He paused, smirked a little, and threw the brunette a pointed look. Yusuke rolled his eyes and gestured for the psychic to hurry up. “I just think he’s distracted. It’s been that way since before he left his job.”
“Go yell at Yomi about it, then-Shit!” Small eruptions of flames had just danced up on the stove. Hastily he rescued his food with one hand while the other groped for and found and poured out the contents of a box of baking soda until the fire smothered. Inspecting the remains of his lunch, he frowned down at the charred surface, shrugged, and busted open the crisp dark outside and took a steaming wincing bite of the still-intact inside. He stuck out his tongue and ran the burnt part under his front teeth. “Seriously, though, I think he was fine until he accepted that job offer in Gandhara. It gets hard trying to do shit here while you’re thinking on shit there. That’s why I dump my stuff on Hokushin whenever I’m here.”
Rolling his eyes, Kuwabara said, “Don’t burn my lunch. Or his.” Earlier Kurama had called him up, sounding flustered and explaining that he’d left things sort of a mess on Friday; could Kuwabara please bring him some food? On his way to the ramen shop the psychic had stopped at the convenience store and bought a candy bar since it seemed like his friend had made sweet stuff his personal de-stressor of choice, and judging from how he seemed on the phone the carrot-top figured he could probably use it. “Oh hey!” Speaking of cleaning. “Could you have something ready for me to pick up on my way back? Shizuru said to empty out the fridge and I really want to spare Yukina.”
Yusuke laughed. “you’re so chivalrous.”
“Since when the hell do you use words like ‘chivalrous’?”
“Shaddup. Pay me now or if you’re not back before I get hungry it’s my dinner.” Kuwabara tossed some money on the table. “’Sides, Keiko likes it when I use words like ‘chivalrous.’”
“Ah-Yeah, you’d better do all you can to keep the one girl who’s interested in you, interested.”
“Better the one girl interested in me than the one girl I’m interested in.” Uh, he thought. No matter: the look on Kuwabara’s face was the one he wanted.
But the look quickly evaporated. Kuwabara kept in mine that while he hadn’t always been a ladies’ man, Urameshi never had been. So there. “Go fuck a toaster, Urameshi,” he retorted cheerfully, taking his and Kurama’s lunches, now boxed-up and (surprisingly) un-burnt.
“’Kay, and afterwards you can eat the toaster strudel with the special creamy icing.” He grinned while Kuwabara gave him a disturbed look.
And returned The Bird, again. “I sure hope you don’t sexually harass all your customers.”
Yusuke put on a horrified widening of the eyes. “How dare you imply I cheat on you?!”
Maybe the heat of the kitchen was going to his head. “See you later, Urameshi,” Kuwabara muttered, shaking his head while the potential mad cook laughed after his exit.
Anyway:
“Come on, it can’t be that bad.”
“Urameshi, you didn’t even make it to high school; don’t you dare tell me what is or what isn’t ‘that bad.’” Yusuke countered the insult with a casual flip of The Bird. “Nice,” Kuwabara said dryly. “This lab sucks ass. It’s too long, most of it’s totally irrelevant, and at the end they make us answer an ass-load of questions and about half of them don’t even match up with the crap we did in the lab. Bottom line: it’s STUPID. And the brainiacs I’m with aren’t much help at all. Kaito’s about as lost as I am-”
“And you were afraid he’d pull a mental bitch-slap on you, ‘you dolt.’”
Kuwabara returned The Bird. “And Kurama-well, ‘Shuichi’ at school-doesn’t pay as much attention as he probably should-”
“Wait, you’re trying to say Kurama’s the slacker?”
“Quit interrupting me, it’s rude! And no, I’m not saying he’s a slacker…” He paused, smirked a little, and threw the brunette a pointed look. Yusuke rolled his eyes and gestured for the psychic to hurry up. “I just think he’s distracted. It’s been that way since before he left his job.”
“Go yell at Yomi about it, then-Shit!” Small eruptions of flames had just danced up on the stove. Hastily he rescued his food with one hand while the other groped for and found and poured out the contents of a box of baking soda until the fire smothered. Inspecting the remains of his lunch, he frowned down at the charred surface, shrugged, and busted open the crisp dark outside and took a steaming wincing bite of the still-intact inside. He stuck out his tongue and ran the burnt part under his front teeth. “Seriously, though, I think he was fine until he accepted that job offer in Gandhara. It gets hard trying to do shit here while you’re thinking on shit there. That’s why I dump my stuff on Hokushin whenever I’m here.”
Rolling his eyes, Kuwabara said, “Don’t burn my lunch. Or his.” Earlier Kurama had called him up, sounding flustered and explaining that he’d left things sort of a mess on Friday; could Kuwabara please bring him some food? On his way to the ramen shop the psychic had stopped at the convenience store and bought a candy bar since it seemed like his friend had made sweet stuff his personal de-stressor of choice, and judging from how he seemed on the phone the carrot-top figured he could probably use it. “Oh hey!” Speaking of cleaning. “Could you have something ready for me to pick up on my way back? Shizuru said to empty out the fridge and I really want to spare Yukina.”
Yusuke laughed. “you’re so chivalrous.”
“Since when the hell do you use words like ‘chivalrous’?”
“Shaddup. Pay me now or if you’re not back before I get hungry it’s my dinner.” Kuwabara tossed some money on the table. “’Sides, Keiko likes it when I use words like ‘chivalrous.’”
“Ah-Yeah, you’d better do all you can to keep the one girl who’s interested in you, interested.”
“Better the one girl interested in me than the one girl I’m interested in.” Uh, he thought. No matter: the look on Kuwabara’s face was the one he wanted.
But the look quickly evaporated. Kuwabara kept in mine that while he hadn’t always been a ladies’ man, Urameshi never had been. So there. “Go fuck a toaster, Urameshi,” he retorted cheerfully, taking his and Kurama’s lunches, now boxed-up and (surprisingly) un-burnt.
“’Kay, and afterwards you can eat the toaster strudel with the special creamy icing.” He grinned while Kuwabara gave him a disturbed look.
And returned The Bird, again. “I sure hope you don’t sexually harass all your customers.”
Yusuke put on a horrified widening of the eyes. “How dare you imply I cheat on you?!”
Maybe the heat of the kitchen was going to his head. “See you later, Urameshi,” Kuwabara muttered, shaking his head while the potential mad cook laughed after his exit.