(no subject)

[thosefakesmiles]

So, its def been a really long time since i have updated my journal. Its like i need to have this one really bad night to want to write in here, and i will for awhile but then ill stop. I guess tonight is that one bad night. It has been incredibly shitty. {except talking to Gary of course.} I dont know. Adam was really assholeish. I wanted to hang out with him tonight. I really did. But i was not in the mood to go to some party. I just wanted to "chill" And he didnt even call me to see if i changed my mind, he just went. Then calls and says "im comming to pick you up." Does he not understand that i didnt want to go? I mean what is it with guys. Cant they take a hint? I really wish he had just realized that i wanted to see him and spend the night with just him. I wanted to go out, but just with him. I didnt really want a big party night. But it made me uncomfortable infront of his friends to tell him that. I just spent the night crying and then talking to Gary, which makes me feel better. He really is my best friend. I think i forget to tell him that, even thought i tell him alot. But he really is an amazing friend. All my good friends are amazing to be able to put up with me, but no one puts up with what he does. My crying and complaining, i would hate it. and right now, we are really close. Like i havent heard him say i was his best friend in a long time and he did tonight, and it made me feel really happy. I've always wanted a friend like him, and im really happy i have him.

Im reading a book. I havent read in awhile. I like it. Its nice