(no subject)
The end of the year is approaching. I feel it in my bones. So much remains undone, yet so much has been accomplished, even in this year that seems to have gone by at lightspeed. Instead of waiting to make resolutions for next year, I find that I'm starting to craft resolutions for the rest of this year. These include:
* Not watching TV for one week
* Not getting online for one weekend
* Getting 20 cards out the door for the holidays
* Writing a long letter to someone
* Reading 20 books by the end of the year (I'm at 18)
I think of what has been accomplished this year, and I am proud. I am (in the process of getting) published (by an online literary journal). I reconciled with my family (after standing my ground with my grandma). I helped to facilitate a household change (moving next door) that seems to be benefiting both Alex and myself. I feel that Alex and I have grown much closer over the past year, particularly in understanding what is desired for the future. I don't feel (quite so) afraid of expressing myself and my intents.
However, there are certain things that I still ponder over. I still feel removed. I don't know if I can (or want to) understand life on a common level. I can't think as the common person thinks. I feel as if life's moving at a break-neck speed. I long for something that I somewhat understand but that I also understand will be hard to achieve. I still want more (or less, whatever your view may be). The life that I want is not the life that I have, though this one is pretty darned good. There is still more to be achieved in life. That's what another year is for, n'est-ce pas?
* Not watching TV for one week
* Not getting online for one weekend
* Getting 20 cards out the door for the holidays
* Writing a long letter to someone
* Reading 20 books by the end of the year (I'm at 18)
I think of what has been accomplished this year, and I am proud. I am (in the process of getting) published (by an online literary journal). I reconciled with my family (after standing my ground with my grandma). I helped to facilitate a household change (moving next door) that seems to be benefiting both Alex and myself. I feel that Alex and I have grown much closer over the past year, particularly in understanding what is desired for the future. I don't feel (quite so) afraid of expressing myself and my intents.
However, there are certain things that I still ponder over. I still feel removed. I don't know if I can (or want to) understand life on a common level. I can't think as the common person thinks. I feel as if life's moving at a break-neck speed. I long for something that I somewhat understand but that I also understand will be hard to achieve. I still want more (or less, whatever your view may be). The life that I want is not the life that I have, though this one is pretty darned good. There is still more to be achieved in life. That's what another year is for, n'est-ce pas?