fic: Blue Silk (X-Men: First Class)
Title: Blue Silk
Fandom: X-Men: First Class
Rating: Adult (language, explicit sexual content)
Pairing(s): Darwin/Alex
Contains: (highlight to reveal) A little cross-dressing, consensual rough sex, anal, oral, orgasm delay. Also contains a brief reference to (past) underage sex that was consensual, but not 100% enthusiastic on the part of one character.
Summary: Darwin's kink may not be Alex’s kink, but that’s okay. Eventually. 4,900 words.
Alex didn’t seem especially thrilled when Darwin showed him the panties.
“Are those for me or you?” he asked in a neutral tone. Not wary, really. Just curious.
“Well, I think they’re more your color,” Darwin deadpanned. (The panties were cobalt blue and made of silk, with delicate lace trim all along the waistband and leg openings. They were cool as water in his cupped hands.)
“You want me to wear those?”
“I’d like to see you in them.”
“Right this second?” Now he sounded dubious. It was four in the afternoon, and they’d just come back from a long jog.
“Tonight,” Darwin said. “When you come to my room, have them on under your pajamas.”
“Okay.” Still no enthusiasm, and his cheeks were red - though that might have been because of the jog too.
Darwin bit his lip, momentarily uncertain. He should’ve asked first, he thought. The panties had been a spur-of-the-moment purchase - he’d been in the store looking for something else when he’d spotted them and thought of Alex - but … yeah. He could have asked before showing them to him, at least.
“You don’t have to,” Darwin said softly but firmly. The last thing he wanted was Alex doing something he wasn’t comfortable with, just to please him.
“I know,” Alex said with a casual shrug, glancing away. “It’s okay, though. I don’t mind.”
I don’t mind, Darwin thought with a frown, was very, very different from Yes, I want to. “Hey,” he said, curving a hand around the back of Alex’s neck, “it’s okay. It was just an idea. If you’re not into it, just forget all about it.”
“It’s cool.”
“Look me in the eye and say it.”
Alex sighed and lifted his head. He was blushing from his clavicle to the tips of his ears. Under other circumstances, it would’ve been adorable. “Okay, wearing girls’ underwear isn’t really my thing. I mean, it isn’t something I think about doing. But it’s okay. I’ll do it for you. I don’t mind. You dig me?”
Darwin wasn’t sure he did. Well. He understood what Alex was saying; it was his sincerity that Darwin questioned. He’d figured out a while back that Alex had trouble saying no. It probably had to do with his fear of rejection and abandonment - though they joked that it was to make up for all the rest of the time, when he was a pushy, hotheaded little brat. So Darwin had to be careful, and not take Alex’s words at face value.
Consent wasn’t enough; he needed enthusiastic consent.
Alex grabbed the panties from Darwin’s hand. “You’re right, they’re my color.” He ran an index finger along the lace trim, while a look of mischief flashed across his face. “I’m gonna wear them, but it’s gonna be a surprise. I’m not gonna tell you when I’m wearing them. You’ll be thinking about it, but you’re not gonna know.”
“Tease,” Darwin said.
Alex grinned. Then, as he studied the panties again, his forehead wrinkled. “Where do my balls go?”
Darwin squeezed the back of his neck, smiling, as relief and a spark of excitement warmed his belly. “In my mouth, if you’re lucky.”
~*~
Alex didn’t wear them that night. Not that Darwin had expected him to, but he’d hoped. He thought he concealed his disappointment pretty well - he didn’t say one word about the panties - but Alex proved just how well he knew him by tugging his hair until he glanced up and saying, with a smirk, “Patience.”
Darwin, who’d just yanked Alex’s sweatpants down to his ankles and was about to do the same with his plain cotton briefs, just shook his head. “If I wanted to,” he said, “I could teach you all about patience.” He slid two fingers between Alex’s thighs, lightly stroking his balls through the cotton. He felt Alex’s shiver, heard his sucked-in breath. “I got all night, after all…”
“That’s just fucking mean, man.”
It was, but that wasn’t the reason Darwin quit teasing him and got down to business. He’d been thinking about Alex in blue silk panties all evening, and he had needs too.
~*~
He didn’t wear them at all that week, as far as Darwin knew. A few times, he kind of let on that he was - at dinner, he’d shoot Darwin little knowing looks over the rim of his water glass, or he’d add some wiggle to his walk when he knew Darwin was looking - but when Darwin finally got him back to his room, his eager hands only ever found cotton.
The first couple of times, he laughed ruefully along with Alex. It was pretty funny. But after a while Darwin began to wonder again if Alex was teasing him, or if he was actually dragging his feet, and then it stopped being so funny. He envied Charles his ability to read minds.
You don’t have to, Darwin thought about saying. You don’t even have to tell me why. It’s cool.
But, for some reason, he didn’t say it. It wasn’t that he was afraid Alex would tell him he thought his kink was fucked up; Alex had trouble saying no, but that was pretty much the only thing he had trouble saying. It wasn’t that he thought Alex would feel more pressured, or that he’d stopped being haunted by the thought of Alex Summers in silk and lace.
He tried to say it one night while they were fucking, but somewhere between his brain and his mouth, the words got changed to “Perfect, everything’s perfect, oh God-” And at that moment, everything was perfect; he had a bruisingly tight grip on Alex’s hips and was pounding into him so hard, the bed was shaking. Good thing they had the house pretty much to themselves tonight. Alex, who’d come only moments before, was groaning into his pillow, his fingers twisting in the sheets.
“Perfect,” Darwin breathed again, sitting back on his heels and sliding out of Alex. He flipped Alex over onto his back, pushed two fingers inside to make sure he was still good and slick before hoisting his legs up and slamming in again.
Alex choked out a ragged moan, which echoed in Darwin’s soul as he came.
Afterward, while he was still floating in a post-orgasm haze, Alex wrapped shaking arms around his neck and kissed his forehead. “I’ll wear them,” he whispered, his voice low and rough in Darwin’s ear. “I said I would.”
Darwin opened his mouth to try again, but something blocked the words. He shook his head weakly.
“I will,” Alex insisted, stroking circles in the sweat on his back. “I promise.”
~*~
But he didn’t, and eventually Darwin gave up hoping that he would. He wondered why Alex couldn’t just come out and say he didn’t want to do it (did he seriously think Darwin would be angry? Alex’s past wasn’t especially happy, but he’d always seemed to trust Darwin) but he didn’t think that pressing the issue would help.
He was still convinced that it had been a good idea. Alex would’ve been sexy as hell in those panties. But he realized that he’d implemented it badly. He should have sounded Alex out first, found out where he stood on cross-dressing in general, before suggesting he try it.
Oh, well.
At least Alex wasn’t upset and trying to hide it. If he had been, Darwin was pretty sure Charles or even that new telepath, Jean, would have picked up on it and said something. And that would have been awkward. But everything continued pretty much the same: they spent long hours in the bunker, working on Alex’s control and Darwin’s survival skills; three afternoons a week, Darwin taught driver’s ed to the younger mutants at the school - something his years as a New York City taxi driver apparently qualified him to do; they helped Hank test out his inventions; they cooked in the kitchen and ate in the dining room; they ran off-site errands for Charles and some of the other mutants who couldn’t pass for normal.
Things went on like that for a little while. And so when the panties finally made their appearance, it was indeed, as Alex had promised, a surprise.
~*~
Darwin had just returned from Newark, where he’d been running errands for Hank before swinging by the airport to pick up a newly arrived mutant. The girl, who called herself Storm, was mostly silent as they rode back north, her skinny arms clutching a pink backpack to her chest. After showing her in and pointing her toward Charles’s study, Darwin had turned in the direction of the kitchen, eager for a snack. He’d offered to treat Storm to burgers before getting onto the turnpike, but she’d shaken her head of snow-white hair and said “No thank you” in a quiet little voice. Consequently, he was pretty hungry.
He was picturing the sandwich he intended to build - smoked turkey, sprouts, tomato, a little honey mustard - when he heard footsteps and voices coming up from the basement stairwell. One of those voices belonged to Alex, and he sounded annoyed:
“I said forget about it. Why is that so hard?”
Darwin paused, instinctively uneasy.
“Just tell me,” Sean’s muffled voice insisted. “C’mon, I won’t say anything. Can’t we just act like normal guys for once? Are they Jean’s or Pixie’s?”
Darwin felt something cold drop into his stomach.
“They’re your mom’s.” Alex pushed the basement door open and stepped into the hallway. He had a wicker laundry basket tucked under his arm. When he saw Darwin, he stopped abruptly.
“Hey!” Sean emerged from the stairwell a second later. “Take that back, man,” he said, giving Alex’s elbow a jostle that looked playful enough to Darwin, but which nearly sent the laundry basket tumbling to the floor.
His fingers curled tight around the rim of the basket, his eyes looking everywhere but at Darwin’s face, Alex said, “Just drop it.”
“Come on.” Either Sean had missed the coldness in Alex’s tone, or he was just that desperate for gossip. Darwin supposed he could understand that; the Xavier Mansion was pretty isolated, and Sean at least could pass for normal, so he was used to being around people his age. “Come on,” he persisted. “You have girl’s underwear in your possession, and you’re not even gonna tell me which girl. Not cool, man. Tell him, Darwin.”
What makes you so sure they belong to a girl? The words flitted through Darwin’s mind, unbidden. He bit his lip and studied Alex for a moment, taking in the taut mouth, the pale lashes shadowing cheeks that were suddenly deeply flushed.
“None of my business,” he said at length, with a shrug. “Or yours.”
Sean groaned. Barely audible, Alex mumbled, “They’re Mystique’s, okay? She left them here, now fuck off, both of you.” Hoisting the laundry basket to his chest, he shouldered past Sean and Darwin.
In the awkward silence that followed, Darwin decided that he wasn’t hungry anymore.
Sean scratched at the back of his neck. After Alex’s angry footsteps had faded, he glanced up at Darwin and said, “Shit, man. I fucked that up.” He sounded genuinely chagrined, and more than a little confused. “How come he seems angry with you?”
“Bad aim,” Darwin replied dryly. Damn, he thought. Damn.
“I don’t get it,” Sean went on. “I was just joking with him. What’s his problem?”
Darwin sighed and tried to shrug, but it felt like a muscle spasm; a heaviness had come over him and was weighing down on his neck and shoulders. Fortunately, Sean seemed not to notice.
“Guess I’m gonna find out,” Darwin said. This was pretty much the opposite of what he’d wanted, but he supposed he was to blame. Yes, Alex’s words and sullen tone annoyed him, but he was the one who’d been pretending that things were okay when they clearly weren’t.
They needed to talk. Now. With a blandly apologetic look at Sean, Darwin turned and started down the hallway.
He took his time, dragging his feet over the long, plush carpet, lingering on the stairs. By the time he reached Alex’s bedroom door, the heavy uneasiness had fallen away, though the blood beat loudly in his temples - so much so, that when he finally raised a hand to knock on the polished wood, the sound seemed muted to his ears.
“Alex,” he called, but received no answer. So he knocked again, a little more insistently. “Alex. C’mon, man. Lemme in.”
Again, silence. He could picture Alex standing stock still behind the door, breathing harshly through his mouth. It made him angry; what the hell was Alex so afraid to tell him?
Darwin’s hand dropped to the doorknob. Should he? he wondered. No, Alex hadn’t given him permission. So he knocked a third time, raising his voice, making it a command:
“Alex! Open the damn door.”
The seconds ticked by as he waited for a response. After a minute of heated silence, he lost his temper. With a frustrated grunt, he slammed the heel of his palm hard against the door. He felt the vibration of the wood beneath his hand, but no pain. Pain he might have welcomed, he thought with a grimace, because it was something.
“Alex,” he began again warningly. Then he stopped himself. What the hell was he doing? Standing in a hallway, bellowing at a door while the guy behind it refused to even acknowledge him? He looked like a fool and he was beginning to feel like one. Fuck this. And fuck Alex Summers.
Something in his stomach crumpled as the thought flashed through him. But what the hell was he supposed to do? This had started out being about panties, for God’s sake, and Alex had turned it into something else.
Darwin stepped back from the door. Fine, he thought. I tried. He pivoted on his heel and walked away.
~*~
The rest of the day passed in a blur. Darwin spent some time helping Hank unload his new equipment and getting it set up in the laboratory. Then he checked in on Storm, who’d already been given a room and was in there making friends with Jean and Pixie, the other two girls at Charles’s school. They seemed to be getting along; Storm actually looked up and gave him a brief, shy smile when he poked his head in.
Dinner came and went. Darwin picked disinterestedly at his pasta, only half-listening to the conversation around him. He excused himself early, even though Alex hadn’t made an appearance yet, and went up to his room to do some reading before getting ready for bed.
He had trouble falling asleep that night. He tossed for a while, occasionally pushing himself up on one elbow so he could rearrange his pillows. Eventually, he did manage to slip into a restless, shallow slumber. But no sooner had he begun to dream than he felt a hand on his shoulder, shaking him gently.
Darwin started, a host of bad scenarios chasing each other through his fogged mind. They’d been discovered by the CIA. They were under attack. Erik was back. The US was at war with the Soviets. Hank had blown up his lab. Someone had said something mean to that little girl, Storm.
But the figure leaning over him in the darkness was too big to be Storm, and he didn’t smell smoke or hear any alarms going off. As his pulse slowed, Darwin heard Alex mumble, “Sorry. I, uh…” And the hand fell away from his shoulder.
Darwin sat up. He started to reach for the lamp on his nightstand, but Alex shifted, blocking him.
“No,” Alex said. “Wait.”
Darwin squinted. There wasn’t much moonlight coming in through the curtains, but there was enough for him to see the spiky tips of Alex’s hair and the limestone outline of his bare shoulders. He heard the shaky, indrawn breath, felt the mattress move as Alex shifted his weight again.
“Okay,” he said, cautiously keeping his tone neutral. It had to be a good sign that Alex was here. At the same time, he didn’t want to appear too forgiving; he’d been angry, and while time, food, and a little sleep had cooled his temper, a part of him was still angry. “What is it?”
Instead of answering, Alex started to lean toward him. Darwin felt his warm breath, and managed to twist out of the way just in time to avoid being kissed. “Hold it,” he said, putting his hands on Alex’s chest and keeping him at arm’s length. “Just talk to me, okay?”
Alex was quiet. Beneath Darwin’s hands, his skin was cold, which was unusual. Because of his mutation, Alex typically ran hot; it was a beautiful thing on winter nights, like having a personal furnace. He only cooled down after expending large amounts of energy in a short time.
“You were training?” Darwin asked.
Alex gave a barely perceptible nod.
“For how long?” He could guess easily enough, but he wanted Alex to say something.
“A while,” Alex admitted finally. “After you left, I went down to the bunker and just started … blowing stuff up. Guess you could call it training. Anyway, the professor came down. He brought me dinner.” Alex’s mouth twitched.
“Did he say anything?”
“Yeah. ‘I think that’s enough for tonight, Alex.’” His impression of Charles’s English accent wasn’t all that bad. “He knows, you know.”
“About us? He’s known for a long time. Probably the only people who don’t are-”
“No, I mean - I know he knows that we’re…” He trailed off, leaving Darwin to wonder what it was he couldn’t say. We’re queer? We’re together? After a moment or two, Alex sucked in a sharp breath, then said in a rush, “He knows things are fucked up. He didn’t say it, but he knows. I’m sorry, okay? I’m really sorry. It’s my fault.”
“Alex…”
“I wanna fix it,” he went on, ignoring the hand that Darwin had started to lift toward his face. “Just let me, okay?”
His arm trembled as he reached for the lamp. Darwin heard the jingle of the chain. Then the space between them was flooded with warm gold light.
Darwin’s eyes adjusted almost instantly, while Alex had to sit there squinting for about a minute. Consequently, he missed Darwin’s surprised look, which was followed by a frown of irritation. By the time he could see again, Darwin had schooled his expression and was reaching for him again. Stroking the pads of his thumbs across Alex’s cheekbones, he murmured, “Baby, you didn’t have to. I meant that.”
Alex’s breath hitched. “I know. I wanted to, though. All along. It was just...”
“Just what?” Darwin prompted.
“Just… Don’t be mad, okay?” Without waiting for Darwin’s assurances, he went on quickly. “It’s just, I dressed up for people before. Like I told you, it’s not really my thing. But I did it.”
“How come?”
Alex shrugged. Slanting his glance away from Darwin’s face, he mumbled, “I guess I hoped they’d stick around. It’s fucked up.”
He sounded so young when he said that, so ridiculously young, that Darwin leaned up and kissed his forehead. Beneath his lips, Alex’s brow creased, but he didn’t tense up or try to pull away. So Darwin kissed him again.
Everything made sense now: Alex’s initial hesitation, then his sudden willingness to indulge Darwin’s kink, followed by weeks of foot-dragging. Distantly, Darwin knew that he could have taken offense. Didn’t Alex trust him by now? They’d been together for months. Didn’t he know that Darwin was serious about what they had, and a stupid pair of panties, purchased on a whim, wasn’t going to derail that? At the same time, he knew he couldn’t be angry. Alex sounded young because he was young, and he’d spent the better part of his life being handed from one foster family to another. Charles Xavier’s mansion was the first real home he’d known since his parents died, and Darwin couldn’t fault him if he was still having trouble wrapping his head around that.
“We’re all kind of fucked up,” Darwin said, gently massaging the back of Alex’s neck. “It’s okay. I’m not going anywhere. You didn’t have to wear them.”
“I know,” said Alex. “But I really wanted to. For you.” He pulled away from Darwin and stood up. Brushing a hand self-consciously across his bare thigh, he ducked his head and grinned. “You were right. They’re my color.”
Darwin shoved his pillows against his headboard and leaned back, taking a few long moments to appreciate the sight of Alex Summers in silk panties. As he’d expected, they didn’t fit perfectly. For one thing, they’d been designed to sit low on curvy hips, and Alex’s were quite narrow. For another, as Alex himself had once pointed out, there wasn’t much room for his cock and balls. Even soft, they strained against the fine material, creating a very prominent bulge.
Remembering his response to Alex’s query, Darwin pushed back the blanket and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Taking Alex by the hips, he tugged him closer so his lips just grazed Alex’s navel. He licked around the small indentation, then followed the sparse trail of short blond hairs to the panties’ lace-trimmed waistband. Alex swallowed.
Darwin looked up at him and grinned. “You didn’t walk down the hallway like this, did you?”
Alex’s eyes widened. “Are you kidding me? My pajamas are over there.” He jerked his chin at the door.
“Just checking.” His curiosity satisfied, Darwin returned to the task at hand. He stroked the backs of Alex’s thighs, coaxing his legs a little wider apart. Then he lowered his head and began to lick teasingly at Alex’s skin, tracing the crease between his hip and groin with the tip of his tongue.
“Uhh,” said Alex, trembling slightly.
Darwin squeezed his thighs, holding him firmly in place while he continued his exploration. He was aware of the growing tent in Alex’s panties, but he ignored it - except for the occasional, “accidental” brush with his shoulder or cheek. The first time, Alex sucked in a sharp breath. The second time, his knees almost buckled, and the sound he made - high, strangled - sent a shiver up Darwin’s spine. Darwin was getting hard too, but he wanted to draw this out as much as he could, not to punish Alex for making him wait so goddamn long, but because he knew it would be good if he could make it last, and with the whole house asleep around them, they actually had the time.
When Alex began to whimper, Darwin finally showed him some mercy. Giving his inner thigh one last sweep with his tongue, he turned his attention to Alex’s erection, which by now was straining against the silk. In the lamplight, he could see the small wet spot and when he touched his tongue to it, Alex let out a yelp.
Chuckling, Darwin closed his mouth over the tip of Alex’s erection, tonguing him through the silk.
Alex groaned. He grabbed at Darwin’s shoulders, holding on tight while Darwin slipped one finger, then another under the lace trim. He skimmed his fingertips along the cleft between Alex’s buttocks, just taking a moment to appreciate the smoothness of his skin, and the firmness, before probing deeper.
Slowly, he told himself. Slowly.
“Wait,” Alex panted, pushing gently at his shoulders. “Hey, wait a sec-”
Immediately concerned, Darwin lifted his head, withdrawing his fingers. “Everything okay?”
Alex gave his hair an affectionate, reassuring tug. “It’s hot. I just wanna do you, is all.”
Well, shit. Darwin wasn’t going to argue with that. He scooted backward, crossing his arms over his chest so he could pull his undershirt over his head. Alex laughed at his enthusiasm and bent to help him wriggle out of his pajama pants. Darwin’s skin tingled as the cool air brushed it, but a moment later the mattress bounced and Alex was on top of him, kissing his neck and running his hands over his bare torso.
Darwin lay back, his eyes transfixed by the shadows that bounced against the plastered ceiling, while Alex pinched his nipples and licked broad stripes across his chest and belly. When the soft, dry lips found his cock, Darwin fluttered his eyelids and moaned. He slid his fingers into Alex’s short hair. Alex hummed in response, hollowing out his cheeks and taking him deeper.
“Oh, God,” Darwin choked. He wished he could see all of Alex, but just the knowledge that he was going down on him in silk panties was enough. His balls tightened as his climax neared. Before he reached it, though, Alex lifted his head and said one more time, “Wait.”
“Please,” Darwin whispered. Through half-lidded eyes, he watched as Alex rose and walked over to the nightstand. He heard the small drawer open and close. When Alex turned again, he had a small bottle of lube in his hand and was already squeezing a generous amount into his palm.
Darwin clenched his teeth, fighting the urge to come as Alex coated him liberally and efficiently, then started to roll the panties down. He didn’t remove them altogether, but let them hang tautly between his parted thighs.
“C’mon,” Darwin urged.
“Wait.” With a teasing smirk, Alex reached between his own legs and slipped two fingers into himself. This was mainly for show, and they both knew it; Alex liked it hard and rough, liked to feel it for a long time afterward. Sometimes they forewent the preparation altogether, and just used plenty of lube.
“Come on,” Darwin growled, a bead of sweat sliding down his neck. He gripped the blanket beneath him. “You know how long I waited for this?”
“Uh, yeah.” Alex withdrew his fingers and climbed back onto the bed. He straddled Darwin’s thighs. “You ready? Don’t come yet. You know,” he continued conversationally as he reached back to grasp Darwin’s erection, “I wore garters for this one guy.”
Darwin let out a whine.
“This other time, in high school, I was with this guy, and he talked me into wearing red fishnet stockings. I think he stole them off his sister, but they fit-” He paused to grimace as Darwin breached his opening, “-perfectly.”
A shudder went through Darwin like a series of tiny earthquakes. His skin had never felt so thin, each nerve laid bare. “Fuck, Alex.”
So slow.
He focused on Alex’s chest, on the flush that spread across it, visible despite the backlighting. Whether it was due to his mutation or his arousal, Darwin couldn’t tell. He was acutely aware of each sharp breath, of each half-pained grunt.
So tight.
“Alex,” he moaned.
Alex’s body clenched him like a fist. He still wore that little smirk - and, good God, he still had those panties on, stretched tight across his thighs - but his voice shook as he said, “This what you had in mind?”
Darwin couldn’t remember what he’d envisioned when he’d first picked up the panties. All he knew right then was that he had to move, and that Alex had better be okay with that, since he wasn’t going to last much longer. Thanks to his mutation, he had more endurance than most men, but he wasn’t made of fucking stone. Not under normal circumstances, anyway.
“Come on, fuck me,” Alex said, and like a reflex, Darwin bucked his hips sharply. Alex bit off a shout.
“Shh,” Darwin soothed. He reached for Alex’s cock, stroking the head with the pad of his thumb while he continued to thrust. He held Alex’s hip with his other hand. “Shh, that’s right. Damn, you’re beautiful. You’re just about the best thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”
Alex’s groan sounded tattered. He moved up and down on Darwin’s cock, his knuckles white as he clenched the bunched-up panties. Darwin knew when he was on the brink; his head tipped back and cords of his neck stood out against the splotched skin. Two more sharp thrusts, and Alex was coming, shooting hot white stripes across Darwin’s wrist.
He sagged after that, so Darwin pushed himself up on one elbow, holding onto Alex as he flipped them over. He peeled the soiled panties away, tossing them to the floor so he could push Alex’s knees up to his shoulders. Alex’s body was perfectly pliant, his blue-gray eyes clouded and dazed. Darwin kissed his neck and whispered, “Gonna come in you. Gonna fill you up. Gonna-”
He never got the rest out because just then the heat in his belly uncoiled, his hips started juddering, and his vision went white.
When he came back to himself, he was still wrapped around Alex, who lay perfectly still except for his chest, which rose and fell with each tattered heartbeat. His eyes were closed.
“Hey.” Darwin nipped his ear.
“Hey,” Alex mumbled.
With a tired groan, Darwin pushed himself up, pulling slowly out of Alex. Alex whimpered as Darwin helped him lower his legs, but he kept his eyes closed.
Darwin studied him thoughtfully for a few moments, while his heartbeat slowed and his breath resumed its normal rhythm. He should clean them both up, he knew. Now, before exhaustion really hit. But all he really wanted to do at that moment was hold Alex some more, so he lay back down beside him and gathered him close.
“Love you,” he whispered against Alex’s shoulder. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Alex curled against Darwin, making a small, muffled sound. It might have been nothing, or it might have been, I know.
5/2/2012
Fandom: X-Men: First Class
Rating: Adult (language, explicit sexual content)
Pairing(s): Darwin/Alex
Contains: (highlight to reveal) A little cross-dressing, consensual rough sex, anal, oral, orgasm delay. Also contains a brief reference to (past) underage sex that was consensual, but not 100% enthusiastic on the part of one character.
Summary: Darwin's kink may not be Alex’s kink, but that’s okay. Eventually. 4,900 words.
Alex didn’t seem especially thrilled when Darwin showed him the panties.
“Are those for me or you?” he asked in a neutral tone. Not wary, really. Just curious.
“Well, I think they’re more your color,” Darwin deadpanned. (The panties were cobalt blue and made of silk, with delicate lace trim all along the waistband and leg openings. They were cool as water in his cupped hands.)
“You want me to wear those?”
“I’d like to see you in them.”
“Right this second?” Now he sounded dubious. It was four in the afternoon, and they’d just come back from a long jog.
“Tonight,” Darwin said. “When you come to my room, have them on under your pajamas.”
“Okay.” Still no enthusiasm, and his cheeks were red - though that might have been because of the jog too.
Darwin bit his lip, momentarily uncertain. He should’ve asked first, he thought. The panties had been a spur-of-the-moment purchase - he’d been in the store looking for something else when he’d spotted them and thought of Alex - but … yeah. He could have asked before showing them to him, at least.
“You don’t have to,” Darwin said softly but firmly. The last thing he wanted was Alex doing something he wasn’t comfortable with, just to please him.
“I know,” Alex said with a casual shrug, glancing away. “It’s okay, though. I don’t mind.”
I don’t mind, Darwin thought with a frown, was very, very different from Yes, I want to. “Hey,” he said, curving a hand around the back of Alex’s neck, “it’s okay. It was just an idea. If you’re not into it, just forget all about it.”
“It’s cool.”
“Look me in the eye and say it.”
Alex sighed and lifted his head. He was blushing from his clavicle to the tips of his ears. Under other circumstances, it would’ve been adorable. “Okay, wearing girls’ underwear isn’t really my thing. I mean, it isn’t something I think about doing. But it’s okay. I’ll do it for you. I don’t mind. You dig me?”
Darwin wasn’t sure he did. Well. He understood what Alex was saying; it was his sincerity that Darwin questioned. He’d figured out a while back that Alex had trouble saying no. It probably had to do with his fear of rejection and abandonment - though they joked that it was to make up for all the rest of the time, when he was a pushy, hotheaded little brat. So Darwin had to be careful, and not take Alex’s words at face value.
Consent wasn’t enough; he needed enthusiastic consent.
Alex grabbed the panties from Darwin’s hand. “You’re right, they’re my color.” He ran an index finger along the lace trim, while a look of mischief flashed across his face. “I’m gonna wear them, but it’s gonna be a surprise. I’m not gonna tell you when I’m wearing them. You’ll be thinking about it, but you’re not gonna know.”
“Tease,” Darwin said.
Alex grinned. Then, as he studied the panties again, his forehead wrinkled. “Where do my balls go?”
Darwin squeezed the back of his neck, smiling, as relief and a spark of excitement warmed his belly. “In my mouth, if you’re lucky.”
~*~
Alex didn’t wear them that night. Not that Darwin had expected him to, but he’d hoped. He thought he concealed his disappointment pretty well - he didn’t say one word about the panties - but Alex proved just how well he knew him by tugging his hair until he glanced up and saying, with a smirk, “Patience.”
Darwin, who’d just yanked Alex’s sweatpants down to his ankles and was about to do the same with his plain cotton briefs, just shook his head. “If I wanted to,” he said, “I could teach you all about patience.” He slid two fingers between Alex’s thighs, lightly stroking his balls through the cotton. He felt Alex’s shiver, heard his sucked-in breath. “I got all night, after all…”
“That’s just fucking mean, man.”
It was, but that wasn’t the reason Darwin quit teasing him and got down to business. He’d been thinking about Alex in blue silk panties all evening, and he had needs too.
~*~
He didn’t wear them at all that week, as far as Darwin knew. A few times, he kind of let on that he was - at dinner, he’d shoot Darwin little knowing looks over the rim of his water glass, or he’d add some wiggle to his walk when he knew Darwin was looking - but when Darwin finally got him back to his room, his eager hands only ever found cotton.
The first couple of times, he laughed ruefully along with Alex. It was pretty funny. But after a while Darwin began to wonder again if Alex was teasing him, or if he was actually dragging his feet, and then it stopped being so funny. He envied Charles his ability to read minds.
You don’t have to, Darwin thought about saying. You don’t even have to tell me why. It’s cool.
But, for some reason, he didn’t say it. It wasn’t that he was afraid Alex would tell him he thought his kink was fucked up; Alex had trouble saying no, but that was pretty much the only thing he had trouble saying. It wasn’t that he thought Alex would feel more pressured, or that he’d stopped being haunted by the thought of Alex Summers in silk and lace.
He tried to say it one night while they were fucking, but somewhere between his brain and his mouth, the words got changed to “Perfect, everything’s perfect, oh God-” And at that moment, everything was perfect; he had a bruisingly tight grip on Alex’s hips and was pounding into him so hard, the bed was shaking. Good thing they had the house pretty much to themselves tonight. Alex, who’d come only moments before, was groaning into his pillow, his fingers twisting in the sheets.
“Perfect,” Darwin breathed again, sitting back on his heels and sliding out of Alex. He flipped Alex over onto his back, pushed two fingers inside to make sure he was still good and slick before hoisting his legs up and slamming in again.
Alex choked out a ragged moan, which echoed in Darwin’s soul as he came.
Afterward, while he was still floating in a post-orgasm haze, Alex wrapped shaking arms around his neck and kissed his forehead. “I’ll wear them,” he whispered, his voice low and rough in Darwin’s ear. “I said I would.”
Darwin opened his mouth to try again, but something blocked the words. He shook his head weakly.
“I will,” Alex insisted, stroking circles in the sweat on his back. “I promise.”
~*~
But he didn’t, and eventually Darwin gave up hoping that he would. He wondered why Alex couldn’t just come out and say he didn’t want to do it (did he seriously think Darwin would be angry? Alex’s past wasn’t especially happy, but he’d always seemed to trust Darwin) but he didn’t think that pressing the issue would help.
He was still convinced that it had been a good idea. Alex would’ve been sexy as hell in those panties. But he realized that he’d implemented it badly. He should have sounded Alex out first, found out where he stood on cross-dressing in general, before suggesting he try it.
Oh, well.
At least Alex wasn’t upset and trying to hide it. If he had been, Darwin was pretty sure Charles or even that new telepath, Jean, would have picked up on it and said something. And that would have been awkward. But everything continued pretty much the same: they spent long hours in the bunker, working on Alex’s control and Darwin’s survival skills; three afternoons a week, Darwin taught driver’s ed to the younger mutants at the school - something his years as a New York City taxi driver apparently qualified him to do; they helped Hank test out his inventions; they cooked in the kitchen and ate in the dining room; they ran off-site errands for Charles and some of the other mutants who couldn’t pass for normal.
Things went on like that for a little while. And so when the panties finally made their appearance, it was indeed, as Alex had promised, a surprise.
~*~
Darwin had just returned from Newark, where he’d been running errands for Hank before swinging by the airport to pick up a newly arrived mutant. The girl, who called herself Storm, was mostly silent as they rode back north, her skinny arms clutching a pink backpack to her chest. After showing her in and pointing her toward Charles’s study, Darwin had turned in the direction of the kitchen, eager for a snack. He’d offered to treat Storm to burgers before getting onto the turnpike, but she’d shaken her head of snow-white hair and said “No thank you” in a quiet little voice. Consequently, he was pretty hungry.
He was picturing the sandwich he intended to build - smoked turkey, sprouts, tomato, a little honey mustard - when he heard footsteps and voices coming up from the basement stairwell. One of those voices belonged to Alex, and he sounded annoyed:
“I said forget about it. Why is that so hard?”
Darwin paused, instinctively uneasy.
“Just tell me,” Sean’s muffled voice insisted. “C’mon, I won’t say anything. Can’t we just act like normal guys for once? Are they Jean’s or Pixie’s?”
Darwin felt something cold drop into his stomach.
“They’re your mom’s.” Alex pushed the basement door open and stepped into the hallway. He had a wicker laundry basket tucked under his arm. When he saw Darwin, he stopped abruptly.
“Hey!” Sean emerged from the stairwell a second later. “Take that back, man,” he said, giving Alex’s elbow a jostle that looked playful enough to Darwin, but which nearly sent the laundry basket tumbling to the floor.
His fingers curled tight around the rim of the basket, his eyes looking everywhere but at Darwin’s face, Alex said, “Just drop it.”
“Come on.” Either Sean had missed the coldness in Alex’s tone, or he was just that desperate for gossip. Darwin supposed he could understand that; the Xavier Mansion was pretty isolated, and Sean at least could pass for normal, so he was used to being around people his age. “Come on,” he persisted. “You have girl’s underwear in your possession, and you’re not even gonna tell me which girl. Not cool, man. Tell him, Darwin.”
What makes you so sure they belong to a girl? The words flitted through Darwin’s mind, unbidden. He bit his lip and studied Alex for a moment, taking in the taut mouth, the pale lashes shadowing cheeks that were suddenly deeply flushed.
“None of my business,” he said at length, with a shrug. “Or yours.”
Sean groaned. Barely audible, Alex mumbled, “They’re Mystique’s, okay? She left them here, now fuck off, both of you.” Hoisting the laundry basket to his chest, he shouldered past Sean and Darwin.
In the awkward silence that followed, Darwin decided that he wasn’t hungry anymore.
Sean scratched at the back of his neck. After Alex’s angry footsteps had faded, he glanced up at Darwin and said, “Shit, man. I fucked that up.” He sounded genuinely chagrined, and more than a little confused. “How come he seems angry with you?”
“Bad aim,” Darwin replied dryly. Damn, he thought. Damn.
“I don’t get it,” Sean went on. “I was just joking with him. What’s his problem?”
Darwin sighed and tried to shrug, but it felt like a muscle spasm; a heaviness had come over him and was weighing down on his neck and shoulders. Fortunately, Sean seemed not to notice.
“Guess I’m gonna find out,” Darwin said. This was pretty much the opposite of what he’d wanted, but he supposed he was to blame. Yes, Alex’s words and sullen tone annoyed him, but he was the one who’d been pretending that things were okay when they clearly weren’t.
They needed to talk. Now. With a blandly apologetic look at Sean, Darwin turned and started down the hallway.
He took his time, dragging his feet over the long, plush carpet, lingering on the stairs. By the time he reached Alex’s bedroom door, the heavy uneasiness had fallen away, though the blood beat loudly in his temples - so much so, that when he finally raised a hand to knock on the polished wood, the sound seemed muted to his ears.
“Alex,” he called, but received no answer. So he knocked again, a little more insistently. “Alex. C’mon, man. Lemme in.”
Again, silence. He could picture Alex standing stock still behind the door, breathing harshly through his mouth. It made him angry; what the hell was Alex so afraid to tell him?
Darwin’s hand dropped to the doorknob. Should he? he wondered. No, Alex hadn’t given him permission. So he knocked a third time, raising his voice, making it a command:
“Alex! Open the damn door.”
The seconds ticked by as he waited for a response. After a minute of heated silence, he lost his temper. With a frustrated grunt, he slammed the heel of his palm hard against the door. He felt the vibration of the wood beneath his hand, but no pain. Pain he might have welcomed, he thought with a grimace, because it was something.
“Alex,” he began again warningly. Then he stopped himself. What the hell was he doing? Standing in a hallway, bellowing at a door while the guy behind it refused to even acknowledge him? He looked like a fool and he was beginning to feel like one. Fuck this. And fuck Alex Summers.
Something in his stomach crumpled as the thought flashed through him. But what the hell was he supposed to do? This had started out being about panties, for God’s sake, and Alex had turned it into something else.
Darwin stepped back from the door. Fine, he thought. I tried. He pivoted on his heel and walked away.
~*~
The rest of the day passed in a blur. Darwin spent some time helping Hank unload his new equipment and getting it set up in the laboratory. Then he checked in on Storm, who’d already been given a room and was in there making friends with Jean and Pixie, the other two girls at Charles’s school. They seemed to be getting along; Storm actually looked up and gave him a brief, shy smile when he poked his head in.
Dinner came and went. Darwin picked disinterestedly at his pasta, only half-listening to the conversation around him. He excused himself early, even though Alex hadn’t made an appearance yet, and went up to his room to do some reading before getting ready for bed.
He had trouble falling asleep that night. He tossed for a while, occasionally pushing himself up on one elbow so he could rearrange his pillows. Eventually, he did manage to slip into a restless, shallow slumber. But no sooner had he begun to dream than he felt a hand on his shoulder, shaking him gently.
Darwin started, a host of bad scenarios chasing each other through his fogged mind. They’d been discovered by the CIA. They were under attack. Erik was back. The US was at war with the Soviets. Hank had blown up his lab. Someone had said something mean to that little girl, Storm.
But the figure leaning over him in the darkness was too big to be Storm, and he didn’t smell smoke or hear any alarms going off. As his pulse slowed, Darwin heard Alex mumble, “Sorry. I, uh…” And the hand fell away from his shoulder.
Darwin sat up. He started to reach for the lamp on his nightstand, but Alex shifted, blocking him.
“No,” Alex said. “Wait.”
Darwin squinted. There wasn’t much moonlight coming in through the curtains, but there was enough for him to see the spiky tips of Alex’s hair and the limestone outline of his bare shoulders. He heard the shaky, indrawn breath, felt the mattress move as Alex shifted his weight again.
“Okay,” he said, cautiously keeping his tone neutral. It had to be a good sign that Alex was here. At the same time, he didn’t want to appear too forgiving; he’d been angry, and while time, food, and a little sleep had cooled his temper, a part of him was still angry. “What is it?”
Instead of answering, Alex started to lean toward him. Darwin felt his warm breath, and managed to twist out of the way just in time to avoid being kissed. “Hold it,” he said, putting his hands on Alex’s chest and keeping him at arm’s length. “Just talk to me, okay?”
Alex was quiet. Beneath Darwin’s hands, his skin was cold, which was unusual. Because of his mutation, Alex typically ran hot; it was a beautiful thing on winter nights, like having a personal furnace. He only cooled down after expending large amounts of energy in a short time.
“You were training?” Darwin asked.
Alex gave a barely perceptible nod.
“For how long?” He could guess easily enough, but he wanted Alex to say something.
“A while,” Alex admitted finally. “After you left, I went down to the bunker and just started … blowing stuff up. Guess you could call it training. Anyway, the professor came down. He brought me dinner.” Alex’s mouth twitched.
“Did he say anything?”
“Yeah. ‘I think that’s enough for tonight, Alex.’” His impression of Charles’s English accent wasn’t all that bad. “He knows, you know.”
“About us? He’s known for a long time. Probably the only people who don’t are-”
“No, I mean - I know he knows that we’re…” He trailed off, leaving Darwin to wonder what it was he couldn’t say. We’re queer? We’re together? After a moment or two, Alex sucked in a sharp breath, then said in a rush, “He knows things are fucked up. He didn’t say it, but he knows. I’m sorry, okay? I’m really sorry. It’s my fault.”
“Alex…”
“I wanna fix it,” he went on, ignoring the hand that Darwin had started to lift toward his face. “Just let me, okay?”
His arm trembled as he reached for the lamp. Darwin heard the jingle of the chain. Then the space between them was flooded with warm gold light.
Darwin’s eyes adjusted almost instantly, while Alex had to sit there squinting for about a minute. Consequently, he missed Darwin’s surprised look, which was followed by a frown of irritation. By the time he could see again, Darwin had schooled his expression and was reaching for him again. Stroking the pads of his thumbs across Alex’s cheekbones, he murmured, “Baby, you didn’t have to. I meant that.”
Alex’s breath hitched. “I know. I wanted to, though. All along. It was just...”
“Just what?” Darwin prompted.
“Just… Don’t be mad, okay?” Without waiting for Darwin’s assurances, he went on quickly. “It’s just, I dressed up for people before. Like I told you, it’s not really my thing. But I did it.”
“How come?”
Alex shrugged. Slanting his glance away from Darwin’s face, he mumbled, “I guess I hoped they’d stick around. It’s fucked up.”
He sounded so young when he said that, so ridiculously young, that Darwin leaned up and kissed his forehead. Beneath his lips, Alex’s brow creased, but he didn’t tense up or try to pull away. So Darwin kissed him again.
Everything made sense now: Alex’s initial hesitation, then his sudden willingness to indulge Darwin’s kink, followed by weeks of foot-dragging. Distantly, Darwin knew that he could have taken offense. Didn’t Alex trust him by now? They’d been together for months. Didn’t he know that Darwin was serious about what they had, and a stupid pair of panties, purchased on a whim, wasn’t going to derail that? At the same time, he knew he couldn’t be angry. Alex sounded young because he was young, and he’d spent the better part of his life being handed from one foster family to another. Charles Xavier’s mansion was the first real home he’d known since his parents died, and Darwin couldn’t fault him if he was still having trouble wrapping his head around that.
“We’re all kind of fucked up,” Darwin said, gently massaging the back of Alex’s neck. “It’s okay. I’m not going anywhere. You didn’t have to wear them.”
“I know,” said Alex. “But I really wanted to. For you.” He pulled away from Darwin and stood up. Brushing a hand self-consciously across his bare thigh, he ducked his head and grinned. “You were right. They’re my color.”
Darwin shoved his pillows against his headboard and leaned back, taking a few long moments to appreciate the sight of Alex Summers in silk panties. As he’d expected, they didn’t fit perfectly. For one thing, they’d been designed to sit low on curvy hips, and Alex’s were quite narrow. For another, as Alex himself had once pointed out, there wasn’t much room for his cock and balls. Even soft, they strained against the fine material, creating a very prominent bulge.
Remembering his response to Alex’s query, Darwin pushed back the blanket and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Taking Alex by the hips, he tugged him closer so his lips just grazed Alex’s navel. He licked around the small indentation, then followed the sparse trail of short blond hairs to the panties’ lace-trimmed waistband. Alex swallowed.
Darwin looked up at him and grinned. “You didn’t walk down the hallway like this, did you?”
Alex’s eyes widened. “Are you kidding me? My pajamas are over there.” He jerked his chin at the door.
“Just checking.” His curiosity satisfied, Darwin returned to the task at hand. He stroked the backs of Alex’s thighs, coaxing his legs a little wider apart. Then he lowered his head and began to lick teasingly at Alex’s skin, tracing the crease between his hip and groin with the tip of his tongue.
“Uhh,” said Alex, trembling slightly.
Darwin squeezed his thighs, holding him firmly in place while he continued his exploration. He was aware of the growing tent in Alex’s panties, but he ignored it - except for the occasional, “accidental” brush with his shoulder or cheek. The first time, Alex sucked in a sharp breath. The second time, his knees almost buckled, and the sound he made - high, strangled - sent a shiver up Darwin’s spine. Darwin was getting hard too, but he wanted to draw this out as much as he could, not to punish Alex for making him wait so goddamn long, but because he knew it would be good if he could make it last, and with the whole house asleep around them, they actually had the time.
When Alex began to whimper, Darwin finally showed him some mercy. Giving his inner thigh one last sweep with his tongue, he turned his attention to Alex’s erection, which by now was straining against the silk. In the lamplight, he could see the small wet spot and when he touched his tongue to it, Alex let out a yelp.
Chuckling, Darwin closed his mouth over the tip of Alex’s erection, tonguing him through the silk.
Alex groaned. He grabbed at Darwin’s shoulders, holding on tight while Darwin slipped one finger, then another under the lace trim. He skimmed his fingertips along the cleft between Alex’s buttocks, just taking a moment to appreciate the smoothness of his skin, and the firmness, before probing deeper.
Slowly, he told himself. Slowly.
“Wait,” Alex panted, pushing gently at his shoulders. “Hey, wait a sec-”
Immediately concerned, Darwin lifted his head, withdrawing his fingers. “Everything okay?”
Alex gave his hair an affectionate, reassuring tug. “It’s hot. I just wanna do you, is all.”
Well, shit. Darwin wasn’t going to argue with that. He scooted backward, crossing his arms over his chest so he could pull his undershirt over his head. Alex laughed at his enthusiasm and bent to help him wriggle out of his pajama pants. Darwin’s skin tingled as the cool air brushed it, but a moment later the mattress bounced and Alex was on top of him, kissing his neck and running his hands over his bare torso.
Darwin lay back, his eyes transfixed by the shadows that bounced against the plastered ceiling, while Alex pinched his nipples and licked broad stripes across his chest and belly. When the soft, dry lips found his cock, Darwin fluttered his eyelids and moaned. He slid his fingers into Alex’s short hair. Alex hummed in response, hollowing out his cheeks and taking him deeper.
“Oh, God,” Darwin choked. He wished he could see all of Alex, but just the knowledge that he was going down on him in silk panties was enough. His balls tightened as his climax neared. Before he reached it, though, Alex lifted his head and said one more time, “Wait.”
“Please,” Darwin whispered. Through half-lidded eyes, he watched as Alex rose and walked over to the nightstand. He heard the small drawer open and close. When Alex turned again, he had a small bottle of lube in his hand and was already squeezing a generous amount into his palm.
Darwin clenched his teeth, fighting the urge to come as Alex coated him liberally and efficiently, then started to roll the panties down. He didn’t remove them altogether, but let them hang tautly between his parted thighs.
“C’mon,” Darwin urged.
“Wait.” With a teasing smirk, Alex reached between his own legs and slipped two fingers into himself. This was mainly for show, and they both knew it; Alex liked it hard and rough, liked to feel it for a long time afterward. Sometimes they forewent the preparation altogether, and just used plenty of lube.
“Come on,” Darwin growled, a bead of sweat sliding down his neck. He gripped the blanket beneath him. “You know how long I waited for this?”
“Uh, yeah.” Alex withdrew his fingers and climbed back onto the bed. He straddled Darwin’s thighs. “You ready? Don’t come yet. You know,” he continued conversationally as he reached back to grasp Darwin’s erection, “I wore garters for this one guy.”
Darwin let out a whine.
“This other time, in high school, I was with this guy, and he talked me into wearing red fishnet stockings. I think he stole them off his sister, but they fit-” He paused to grimace as Darwin breached his opening, “-perfectly.”
A shudder went through Darwin like a series of tiny earthquakes. His skin had never felt so thin, each nerve laid bare. “Fuck, Alex.”
So slow.
He focused on Alex’s chest, on the flush that spread across it, visible despite the backlighting. Whether it was due to his mutation or his arousal, Darwin couldn’t tell. He was acutely aware of each sharp breath, of each half-pained grunt.
So tight.
“Alex,” he moaned.
Alex’s body clenched him like a fist. He still wore that little smirk - and, good God, he still had those panties on, stretched tight across his thighs - but his voice shook as he said, “This what you had in mind?”
Darwin couldn’t remember what he’d envisioned when he’d first picked up the panties. All he knew right then was that he had to move, and that Alex had better be okay with that, since he wasn’t going to last much longer. Thanks to his mutation, he had more endurance than most men, but he wasn’t made of fucking stone. Not under normal circumstances, anyway.
“Come on, fuck me,” Alex said, and like a reflex, Darwin bucked his hips sharply. Alex bit off a shout.
“Shh,” Darwin soothed. He reached for Alex’s cock, stroking the head with the pad of his thumb while he continued to thrust. He held Alex’s hip with his other hand. “Shh, that’s right. Damn, you’re beautiful. You’re just about the best thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”
Alex’s groan sounded tattered. He moved up and down on Darwin’s cock, his knuckles white as he clenched the bunched-up panties. Darwin knew when he was on the brink; his head tipped back and cords of his neck stood out against the splotched skin. Two more sharp thrusts, and Alex was coming, shooting hot white stripes across Darwin’s wrist.
He sagged after that, so Darwin pushed himself up on one elbow, holding onto Alex as he flipped them over. He peeled the soiled panties away, tossing them to the floor so he could push Alex’s knees up to his shoulders. Alex’s body was perfectly pliant, his blue-gray eyes clouded and dazed. Darwin kissed his neck and whispered, “Gonna come in you. Gonna fill you up. Gonna-”
He never got the rest out because just then the heat in his belly uncoiled, his hips started juddering, and his vision went white.
When he came back to himself, he was still wrapped around Alex, who lay perfectly still except for his chest, which rose and fell with each tattered heartbeat. His eyes were closed.
“Hey.” Darwin nipped his ear.
“Hey,” Alex mumbled.
With a tired groan, Darwin pushed himself up, pulling slowly out of Alex. Alex whimpered as Darwin helped him lower his legs, but he kept his eyes closed.
Darwin studied him thoughtfully for a few moments, while his heartbeat slowed and his breath resumed its normal rhythm. He should clean them both up, he knew. Now, before exhaustion really hit. But all he really wanted to do at that moment was hold Alex some more, so he lay back down beside him and gathered him close.
“Love you,” he whispered against Alex’s shoulder. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Alex curled against Darwin, making a small, muffled sound. It might have been nothing, or it might have been, I know.
5/2/2012