Masks and Roses
New day, new page:
I have noticed, of late, that my outlook has become one of a rather negative one, and it's not how I really want to be. ie: it's alright to grumble every now and again, but it's annoying when it happens too frequently. In this vein, I have decided to try and write about a few positive things in my life, no matter how small or insignificant seeming.
1) Today is Friday. This makes me happy, because it's the last day of my work week, and is followed up by 2 full days of off-time and rest. (Granted, my boss has scheduled a work-related meeting for Saturday evening, but eh, it can't all come up roses.) Until then, I shall be elated and relaxed. Yay!
2) Today is also payday. We like payday, since money is good and well received at all times. It's best when your Friday lines up with Payday, as mine does bi-weekly.. because then, not only do I have money for which to pay the bills and get the annoying debt collectors off my back, I also have 2 rest-filled days to enjoy before scurrying my arse off at work again.
3) I got all the meds I needed today, with no delays. In and out, snap of the fingers. This, I enjoy, since I don't have to pay the cabbie more than once.. and it was followed through by the prompt arrival of the bus, so I only had to wait a matter of 2 minutes each stop, before catching my connector home.. and I had a seat on every single bus! (Someone must love me today.)
Following these 3 positive aspects, I think I'll post a few resolutions. I've waited a couple weeks, trying to decide just what I want to do with meself this year, and I don't want to think of them so much as resolutions as stepping stones towards a new and improved me.
1) Keep up with my bills. No late bills=no creditors calling me all damned day long, every day until I fork out the cash. Of course, this is contingent upon me having the money to fork out.
2) Sign up for Healthy San Francisco on Wednesday, January 21, 2009. This is important, because it means I'll have health insurance and thus not have to worry about not getting my medications and sundry to take care of my diabetes. It's also a footnote for one more positive aspect:
If I sign up for Healthy San Francisco (I have been told) that there's a list of health clubs that will allow me to utilize their facilities. I'm not sure how much it'll cost me, if anything, but hey.. a low cost health club I can deal with.
3) Lose the damned weight. Currently, I'm stationary at 230 lbs. I have dropped 7, but I'm under no illusions that it'll remain off if I slough off. It'll only help improve my mood and other sundry baggage in the long run.
4) Start spending Sunday afternoons in Golden Gate Park, with the S.C.A. folks, practicing archery and rapier, when I can.
5) Attend church more often.. hopefully, regularly. (This is a path to a more spiritual me--people don't necessarily have to understand or care.)
6) Work on artwork more. Preferrably create actual finished pieces which can go into my portfolio. I spent 5 years and who knows how much money going to school, I'd better do this.
7) Find a better job. I'm sorry, but it's necessary. My budget is poor and barely keeping ahead. My feet hurt continuously, and often, my back does as well. I'm also getting cranky, because people are people, and generally don't tip worth shite. (There are acceptions, but for the most part, people are cheap.)
And that's the extent to which I'll wax complain over that subject, since this is to be a positive entry.
I think that should be enough for one person right now, though I'll add one more thing.. I want to spend a little time, contemplating myself.. who I am, what I need and want and where the two differ or if it's sometimes the same. I know that I need to be a bit less focused on me, myself and I, and it's difficult..damn, it's hard.. especially when you're single, because you don't have to look out for anyone else.
However, I want to believe that I'm not constantly seeking attention from everyone and anyone. That's the big thing.. I don't want to look back, and feel embarrassed that all this time, I've been keeping myself in a box where it's all about me.
So, that's enough, then.. I hope the post isn't too long.
I have noticed, of late, that my outlook has become one of a rather negative one, and it's not how I really want to be. ie: it's alright to grumble every now and again, but it's annoying when it happens too frequently. In this vein, I have decided to try and write about a few positive things in my life, no matter how small or insignificant seeming.
1) Today is Friday. This makes me happy, because it's the last day of my work week, and is followed up by 2 full days of off-time and rest. (Granted, my boss has scheduled a work-related meeting for Saturday evening, but eh, it can't all come up roses.) Until then, I shall be elated and relaxed. Yay!
2) Today is also payday. We like payday, since money is good and well received at all times. It's best when your Friday lines up with Payday, as mine does bi-weekly.. because then, not only do I have money for which to pay the bills and get the annoying debt collectors off my back, I also have 2 rest-filled days to enjoy before scurrying my arse off at work again.
3) I got all the meds I needed today, with no delays. In and out, snap of the fingers. This, I enjoy, since I don't have to pay the cabbie more than once.. and it was followed through by the prompt arrival of the bus, so I only had to wait a matter of 2 minutes each stop, before catching my connector home.. and I had a seat on every single bus! (Someone must love me today.)
Following these 3 positive aspects, I think I'll post a few resolutions. I've waited a couple weeks, trying to decide just what I want to do with meself this year, and I don't want to think of them so much as resolutions as stepping stones towards a new and improved me.
1) Keep up with my bills. No late bills=no creditors calling me all damned day long, every day until I fork out the cash. Of course, this is contingent upon me having the money to fork out.
2) Sign up for Healthy San Francisco on Wednesday, January 21, 2009. This is important, because it means I'll have health insurance and thus not have to worry about not getting my medications and sundry to take care of my diabetes. It's also a footnote for one more positive aspect:
If I sign up for Healthy San Francisco (I have been told) that there's a list of health clubs that will allow me to utilize their facilities. I'm not sure how much it'll cost me, if anything, but hey.. a low cost health club I can deal with.
3) Lose the damned weight. Currently, I'm stationary at 230 lbs. I have dropped 7, but I'm under no illusions that it'll remain off if I slough off. It'll only help improve my mood and other sundry baggage in the long run.
4) Start spending Sunday afternoons in Golden Gate Park, with the S.C.A. folks, practicing archery and rapier, when I can.
5) Attend church more often.. hopefully, regularly. (This is a path to a more spiritual me--people don't necessarily have to understand or care.)
6) Work on artwork more. Preferrably create actual finished pieces which can go into my portfolio. I spent 5 years and who knows how much money going to school, I'd better do this.
7) Find a better job. I'm sorry, but it's necessary. My budget is poor and barely keeping ahead. My feet hurt continuously, and often, my back does as well. I'm also getting cranky, because people are people, and generally don't tip worth shite. (There are acceptions, but for the most part, people are cheap.)
And that's the extent to which I'll wax complain over that subject, since this is to be a positive entry.
I think that should be enough for one person right now, though I'll add one more thing.. I want to spend a little time, contemplating myself.. who I am, what I need and want and where the two differ or if it's sometimes the same. I know that I need to be a bit less focused on me, myself and I, and it's difficult..damn, it's hard.. especially when you're single, because you don't have to look out for anyone else.
However, I want to believe that I'm not constantly seeking attention from everyone and anyone. That's the big thing.. I don't want to look back, and feel embarrassed that all this time, I've been keeping myself in a box where it's all about me.
So, that's enough, then.. I hope the post isn't too long.