keyboard smash my love (oneshot)

Apr 30, 2013 00:54



keyboard smash my love
kaisoo (jongin/kyungsoo).
pg-13.
au. romance. humor/borderline-crack.
oneshot/~4700w.

Chanyeol is convinced Kyungsoo is going to end up a lonely, old man with twenty cats and decides that online dating is the right choice for his socially-awkward friend. He probably should have asked Kyungsoo before signing him up, but isn't "signing up your friend for online gay dating with his credit card" on the list of things best friends can do? It's not? Oh well.


KEYBOARD SMASH MY LOVE

There's a reason why Kyungsoo doesn't let Chanyeol use his laptop. Aside from the occasional porn sites (and viruses) he always finds when Chanyeol steals his laptop for a night, Chanyeol also has a habit of signing Kyungsoo up for things he does not want. Coupon deals (admittedly Kyungsoo doesn't mind these), online surveys, cat video watcher - you name it, and Chanyeol has somehow found it.

"You what?!" Kyungsoo exclaims, almost dropping the pot in his hand when Chanyeol sets his laptop on the counter smugly. Kyungsoo almost throws the boiling water at his face.

"I signed you up for an Internet dating site," the older replies cheerily. "I hear they work. Apparently Sehun met a boy on one and that's why he doesn't show up to any of our get-togethers-"

"Sehun doesn't show up because you scare him," Kyungsoo interrupts, ignoring the frown on Chanyeol's lips. "Why would you sign me up for Internet dating, though?!"

Chanyeol looks at him very seriously. Kyungsoo waits for him to say something, but when Chanyeol just keeps staring at him with that annoying look that says "you-know-why," Kyungsoo snaps, "Well?!"

"Because it's been months since you last got laid and it's starting to turn you into a real grouchy-pants," Chanyeol finally replies, and Kyungsoo sputters incredulously, waving the pot around. Chanyeol eyes him cautiously; Kyungsoo can be crazy at times, especially when you bring up sex. He once spat orange juice all over Chanyeol's calculus homework when he brought up Baekhyun's flexibility in bed during their study session, and Chanyeol had to do his homework all over again by himself.

"That's none of your business!" Kyungsoo finally screams when he puts down the pot (to Chanyeol's relief). "I am perfectly fine being single!"

Chanyeol gives him another "are-you-serious" look and Kyungsoo throws the closest thing - which, in this case, is a dirty dish rag - at him. "Stop looking at me like that!"

Chanyeol shakes his head. "I'm going to keep looking at you like this until you fill out your bio."

"My what?"

"Your dating profile!" Chanyeol exclaims, pushing the laptop towards him. "Hurry! There are singles out there ready to mingle!"

"I don't want to mingle!"

Chanyeol just stares. "Listen, if you don't fill it out yourself, I'll do it for you."

Kyungsoo glares at him. "As if I care. I'm not going to use that stupid online dating thing-"

"Oh, but I think you will, Kyungsoo," Chanyeol says, and there's an ominous tone to his words that sends a shiver down Kyungsoo's spine. The last time Chanyeol spoke like that, Kyungsoo found himself pushed to the front of a karaoke bar and forced to sing old 80's songs, which wouldn't be that bad if Kyungsoo wasn't twelve and it wasn't his first "public performance" ever. He almost threw up afterwards.

"And why is that?" Kyungsoo asks, almost afraid to know the answer.

"Because I signed up with your credit card," Chanyeol replies coolly.

"WHAT?! How did you get my credit card number?!" Kyungsoo screams, running towards the laptop and pushing Chanyeol out of the way.

"I have my ways," Chanyeol cackles. "Now fill out your profile, or suffer the consequences."

Kyungsoo refuses to let Chanyeol win, though. He shuts his laptop and glares at Chanyeol. "I don't think so. I'm going to cancel this stupid thing, so you can just leave now."

"But I live here-"

"Leave. Now."

Chanyeol glares at him. "You have not won," he mumbles as he leaves for his room.

Kyungsoo scoffs, bringing his laptop close to his chest. But hasn't he?

-

Kyungsoo almost forgets all about the whole Internet dating site fiasco as the day progresses. It isn't until he gets an e-mail on his phone reading "YOU HAVE ONE NEW MESSAGE..." from ItsSoGay Dating Site that Kyungsoo remembers everything. If he gets an ulcer any time soon, you'd know who to blame.

When Kyungsoo moves to delete the e-mail, he accidentally clicks on it instead. He's never been too technilogically savvy; Chanyeol has often made fun of how slow he types, and has yet to let go of the one time Kyungsoo accidentally dialed a phone-sex operator and had a whole conversation with her until he realized Baekhyun was not on the other line like he had thought.

The message is short.

from kai:
hey.

Real short.

Kyungsoo frowns and deletes the e-mail, shaking his head. He knew this was a bad idea. There were probably creeps and perverts on the Internet. Kyungsoo would much rather be alone forever than have to deal with that.

As if Chanyeol wasn't enough already.

-

Chanyeol stays at Baekhyun's place on Tuesdays, because Baekhyun doesn't have work on Wednesday. Kyungsoo has the dorm to himself then, and makes good use of his free time - by watching dramas on his laptop and stuffing his face with chips that Chanyeol bought (payback is a bitch).

Because Kyungsoo never closes his tabs, and neither does Chanyeol for that matter, ItsSoGay is on the next tab. Kyungsoo moves to close it when he sees two notifications. He stares at it for a long moment, trying to force himself to press the X when he gives in. How bad could it be?

He sees the message from earlier. The sender has the username danceonme_boy14 and Kyungsoo spends a good half minute judging it. The other message is from senpailuvme, and now Kyungsoo is really wondering what kind of website Chanyeol signed him up for.

The first one, from some guy named Kai, is the same as the one from earlier: a simple hey. The second one, from someone named Chen, is even shorter (and creepier): it's just a smiley face. Kyungsoo slowly presses on the "block" button next to Chen's username.

He is about to do the same for Kai, but something stops him. He'd feel kind of bad for blocking this Kai guy, because he only said "hey." Still, Kyungsoo isn't interested - or that's what he tells himself as he clicks on Kai's profile and mother of all things kimchi, this man is beautiful!

Kyungsoo isn't sure how much time he spends looking through Kai's pictures - all four of them - but he can't seem to look away. Kai is hot, to say the least. What was he doing trying to talk to Kyungsoo? I bet these are all fake pictures, Kyungsoo thinks to himself, shaking his head. But that doesn't keep him from clicking away, because these are still good-looking fake photos.

Kyungsoo eventually tears himself away from the photos to read Kai's bio.

hi i'm kai and i dance. my friend made me this account, but since it's already made i might as well use it right??
interests: dancing, cats, cat videos, food, cat food (lol jk)

His profile is a bit childish, but Kyungsoo thinks he may be catching Chanyeol's crazy because he finds it a little cute. And he can definitely sympathize with Kai in that they both had friends make them accounts.

After a long debate with himself (and even longer time spent looking back at Kai's photos), Kyungsoo finally went back to the messages. He inhales slowly and typed: hi.

And then he waits.

As he waits, he goes to his own profile. What he sees almost makes him throw his laptop at the wall (he'd throw it at Chanyeol if he were home). His profile reads:

HI I'M KYUNGSOO I COOK AND CLEAN AND MY GENIUS, HANDSOME FRIEND THINKS I NEED A BOYFRIEND DO U THINK U COULD BE THE ONE HIT ME UP XOXO
interests: cooking, singing, cleaning, cats

Kyungsoo's not sure what's worst: the caps lock, the xoxo at the end, the 'handsome friend,' or that Kyungsoo's profile picture is his seventh grade winter recital photo in which he is wearing a toga (it was Julius Caesar).

"Park. Fucking. Chanyeol," Kyungsoo hisses under his breath as he slowly digs out his phone and finds the photo of Chanyeol in his tighty-whities walking around (he was out of clean boxers) with a plunger on his head (there's no excuse for that), snickering as he presses Send to all his contacts.

"Take that, you piece of shit," Kyungsoo whispers as he waits for it to process. Kyungsoo can be scary when he wants to be.

As Kyungsoo waits for the damage to set in, he notices a new notification. He clicks on the message, feeling a little giddy for some reason.

from kai:
what's up?

Kyungsoo has no idea what's about to begin.

-

Chanyeol comes home the next afternoon, fuming red as Kyungsoo munches on carrots as he taps away at his laptop.

He talked to this Kai all last night. At first, Kai seemed a bit cool and nonchalant, but as their conversations progressed, Kyungsoo learned he was a smiley-abuser (but by then, it was too late to back out because Kyungsoo was starting to find it cute, oh no). They talked about random things, mostly cats at first. Kai linked him to his favorite cat videos (how do people not like cats, like really) and Kyungsoo shared some of his cat photos on his phone, which he never does by the way. Not even when Chanyeol begs.

"WHY DID YOU SEND MY PHOTO TO EVERYONE?!" Chanyeol screams as he approaches Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo doesn't even look at him. "HELLO?!"

"Wait, I'm doing something," Kyungsoo says, waving him off.

Chanyeol narrows his eyes. Kyungsoo has ruined Chanyeol's social life with a click of a button and he tells Chanyeol to wait to yell? But wait, when does Kyungsoo ever go on the computer anyway? Besides when he watches dramas (yes, Chanyeol knows - he recognized all those bookmarks for Secret Garden) and does his homework, Kyungsoo never goes on his laptop.

Unless...

"YOU'RE ON THE DATING SITE, AREN'T YOU?!" Chanyeol exclaims, forgetting all his anger as his friend continues to ignore him. When Kyungsoo doesn't reply, Chanyeol rushes over to look over Kyungsoo's shoulder. Sure enough, he's on ItsSoGay.

"I LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR ONE NIGHT AND YOU ALREADY MEET A GUY?!" Chanyeol screams. "DAMN, YOU MOVE FAST."

Kyungsoo finally stops typing to turn and glare at Chanyeol. "Why are you screaming?" he hisses. Even though Chanyeol's yells are, well, loud, Kyungsoo's hisses are ten times more intimidating. If you listen closely, you can hear Kyungsoo's subliminal message of I will put laxatives in your cereal.

"BECAUSE YOU'RE-" Chanyeol stops to clear his throat and calm himself. "Because you're using the site! I told you it'd work!"

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, turning away from Chanyeol. "Whatever."

Chanyeol grins. "Say it."

"Say what," Kyungsoo grinds out, but he knows. His back is tensing up just at the thought of it.

"You know what," Chanyeol sings.

"I am not going to say it."

"You have to!"

"Do not."

"Do to!"

"Do not."

"Do to!"

"Do- oh, this is ridiculous. Fine, thank you, Chanyeol. Happy?" Kyungsoo asks impatiently, shutting his laptop, ready to move back to the privacy of his room to continue his conversation about the necessity of cheese in cooking.

"Nuh uh. That's not it," Chanyeol reminds him, grinning as he leans forward. He's been waiting for this day since the beginning of the year, when they first made this 'agreement'; he even has his phone out, ready to record this.

Kyungsoo turns to face him slowly, his face grim. Chanyeol is too excited to even be scared, though; he has his button on the record button. "Thank you, Chanyeol, oh-wise-one-with-beautiful-hair-that-gleams-like-the-sun-and-teeth-that-rival-pearls," Kyungsoo bites out. "Happy, you dick?"

Chanyeol is about to answer, "Yes," when he realizes his phone wasn't on. "Wait, no! I didn't get to rec-" He is cut off when Kyungsoo slams the door on Chanyeol's face.

Kyungsoo falls back onto his bed, rolling his eyes as he ignores Chanyeol's knocking on the door.

kyungsoo: sorry about that, my stupid roommate was being stupid
kai: lol it's okay :) i have a stupid roommate too :(
kyungsoo: yeah he was the one who signed me up for this site he even used my credit card
kai: :O ouch man at least my friend paid for it
kyungsoo: let's switch please
kai: nah let's ditch them and move in together ;)

Kyungsoo snorts aloud, but Kai still manages to make him flush with just his words.

kyungsoo: sure, sure. so do you have like school or something today? it's a wednesday
kai: i have dance class at 2 ~~
kai: but i'd rather stay and talk with youuuuuu
kai: that rhymed lol

Kyungsoo face-palmed. Maybe he really was talking to a twelve-year-old.

kyungsoo: i'd rather talk to you than go to chem class too

But Kyungsoo isn't really any better than Kai then.

-

Kyungsoo and Kai exchange phone numbers after a week of talking. It's much easier to text each other than to log on and lug a laptop around, hogging wifi where ever they go just to talk to each other. Although Kyungsoo often complains that Kai texts him about random, uninteresting topics, he has yet to do anything about it.

from kai:
hey should i buy chocolate chip or raisin bran cookies

from kyungsoo:
ew why would you even ask obviously raisin bran

from kai:
... okay

Kyungsoo is only joking around, thinking Jongin would never buy raisin bran cookies, until he gets a picture of - what do you know - raisin bran cookies and an attached text saying:

from kai:
let's share them one day ^^

Kyungsoo groans as he presses his palm against his cheek. He likes Kai a little more than he expected to, and these texts don't help at all.

-

It isn't until a month and a half that Kai sends Kyungsoo an eery text saying: I have something to confess.

Kyungsoo can't help but have his thoughts wander everywhere. Shit, he's going to admit he's a fifty-year-old perv who sleeps without clothes on. Or that he's only ten and he just wanted to impress his friends. Or that he doesn't like me and this was all a bet. Kyungsoo groans - he can't decide which is the worst of the possibilities.

Hesitantly, Kyungsoo texts back: What is it?

Still, Kyungsoo's mind reels. He knew he shouldn't have trusted Chanyeol and his dumb dating site. He led him into the trap of those Internet scams, and now he's in too deep, and he doesn't know how much ice cream it'll take for Kyungsoo to cope after Kai admits he's-

The phone vibrates and Kyungsoo leaps for it. It's Kai, and the text reads: err, I don't know how to say this, so I'll just come out and say it. my real name isn't kai, it's jongin.

Kyungsoo has to read and reread the text several times for it to sink in. That's it? No revelation? No 'I was lying this entire time'? Just a stupid name?

Now annoyed at himself for being so worried and at Jongin for making him like this, Kyungsoo doesn't even reply; he throws his phone on the sofa and leaves to make himself a bowl of popcorn.

When he returns, there are seven new messages, all from Jongin.

kyungsoo? kyungsoo are you mad at me?

kyungsoo i'm sorry T.T

i just didn't want to put my name on the internet! there r some creepy ppl out there

you know my first message was from some guy named chen he sent me a smiley he's the reason ppl can't know my real name

kyungsoo!! i'm sorry i didn't tell u earlier!

i'm still kai you know!!

KYUNGSOO!!!!!!!!!

Kyungsoo contemplates leaving him to wallow in his misery the way he did to Kyungsoo, but deciding he's a better person than that, he texts back:

you're such a kid

He laughs when he gets Jongin's reply:

says the one who watches pororo

-

After two months of long talks, ranging from politics to gossip to school, Jongin and Kyungsoo finally reveal their locations. As fate would have it, they learn they live in the same city and even visit some of the same places.

Although Kyungsoo still debates with himself as to his actual feelings for the boy - his usage of emoticons can be overbearing - he decides he trusts him enough to meet with him at a nearby coffee shop.

kai: i am so excited!! :D i'll buy you whatever drink you want!!
kai: well just don't make it too expensive bc i am just a college student ;A;
kyungsoo: don't worry, i won't
kyungsoo: i'll make it up to you if i do
kai: //oh//
kyungsoo: you're dumb
kai: xoxo
kyungsoo: i told you i didn't type that! it was chanyeol!
kai: lol i know but it's just so cute :)
kai: like you ;)
kyungsoo: oh whatever good night

Kyungsoo logs off before Jongin can reply, face flushed. Jongin hasn't even seen a real picture of him yet - Kyungsoo's display photo is still the one Chanyeol set up. He hasn't figured out how to change it, and he doesn't know if he wants Jongin to see his face yet. It's almost intimidating to think they'd be seeing each other soon in real life.

As Kyungsoo presses his face into the pillow, trying to hide his embarrassment, he sneaks a peek at his phone to see if Jongin replied after he logged off.

He did.

kai: good night cutie!! ^^ sleep well! dream of me! ;D

-

Hours before their first ever meeting, Kyungsoo is freaking out because what the hell am I supposed to wear? And what if he doesn't find me as cute as my display photo? Or what am I even doing, am I really going on a date with someone I met on the Internet, oh man I'm becoming Sehun, this is bad...?

"Where are you going?" Chanyeol asks as he pops his head into the room.

Kyungsoo yelps as he turns around; he's only in his boxers and tank top. "Can't you knock?!"

Chanyeol snorts. "Why? I've seen everything before-"

"Chanyeol," Kyungsoo hisses, and Chanyeol takes a step back, but he doesn't leave just yet.

"Are you going to meet that guy you've been talking to?" Chanyeol coos, grinning at the flush on Kyungsoo's cheek. "Awwww, my little SooSoo is all grown-up now-"

"I will shove eggs down your throat, Chanyeol," Kyungsoo warns in a low voice, glowering.

"Getting ready for his date, picking out his clothes," Chanyeol continues teasingly. "I should take a picture and send-"

"Take a picture and it will be the last thing you ever do," Kyungsoo snaps. "Now shut up and get out-"

"But don't you want dating advice?" Chanyeol offers innocently.

Kyungsoo glares at him. "What would you know about dating?"

Chanyeol scoffs. "Hello, I've been in a relationship with Baekkie for how long now?"

"I don't know, I don't keep track of your relationship," Kyungsoo deadpans. He doesn't have time to listen to Chanyeol's nonsense - his date is in two hours and he still can't choose between black and gray socks!

Chanyeol purses his lips at Kyungsoo. "Rude. Well, for your information, it's been 200 days 12 hours and 44 minutes since we started dating," Chanyeol says matter-of-factly with a proud nod. Kyungsoo stares. "And do you want to know how this beautiful relationship started?"

"Not really," Kyungsoo sighs.

"I'll tell you-"

"Of course you will..."

"- when he asked me out -"

"Chanyeol, I don't care-"

"- I told him asdfghjkl."

Kyungsoo blinks. Chanyeol grins.

"What."

"Asdfghjkl," Chanyeol repeats with a firm nod. "You know, like a keyboard smash?"

"You hit him with your keyboard?!" Kyungsoo yells. How does Baekhyun stand him?

"What?! No! I mean like when you smash your keyboard-"

"Why would I smash my keyboard?" Kyungsoo asks impatiently. "You know how expensive that would be?"

"Kyungsoo, I didn't mean-"

"I don't have the money to go spending on things like keyboard smashes, Chanyeol, so if you don't mind me, I have to go condition my hair," Kyungsoo huffs, moving to close the door on Chanyeol, when he stops him last minute.

"Just promise me you'll say asdfghjkl when he asks you out," Chanyeol calls out.

"Why?" Kyungsoo huffs.

"Because it's a sure-fire win! I'm only looking out for you!"

Kyungsoo narrows his eyes at Chanyeol, closing the door on him and finishing getting ready peacefully (or as peacefully as a freaking-out twenty-year-old can get ready).

-

Kyungsoo hasn't been this nervous since his first year public speaking class, where he accidentally messed up his speech by replacing the word "organism" with "orgasm." It was an innocent mistake, but it was mortifying enough without Baekhyun and Chanyeol laughing their asses off in the background.

Talking to Jongin is easy enough online or over the phone; he has the time to put his words together to at least sound intelligible. But in real life, Kyungsoo can sometimes be... incoherent, as Chanyeol tries to kindly put it.

"You're an awkward turtle," Chanyeol once told him pitifully.

Kyungsoo never minded though, because his friends always accepted him as that, but now that he's meeting Jongin, who he may or may not have a big crush on by now after seeing countless pictures of him at dance and at the store and in the restrooms (don't ask), he's suddenly feeling self-conscious about these flaws of his.

It's never too late to back out, Kyungsoo says as he approaches the familiar coffee shop. He bites his bottom lip as he pulls the door open slowly. He's ten minutes early, thinking that showing up early would give him time to calm down.

As he enters the shop, he looks up to see someone staring at him. It takes him half a second to recognize the other, and Kyungsoo has to admit that Jongin's photos don't do him any justice. It's almost unfair.

Even though Jongin has never seen a current picture of Kyungsoo yet - despite his constant asking to, Kyungsoo never relented - he seems to recognize Kyungsoo just as quickly.

"Kyungsoo?" he calls out, grinning as he sits up from his seat, almost knocking out the kid behind him. He apologizes both to the kid and mother profusely, who send him glares, before turning to Kyungsoo, who watches him with an amused smile. "Kyungsoo?" he asks again, and Kyungsoo forgets to breathe.

"Uh, hi. Jongin," Kyungsoo says, and curses himself for forgetting how to talk.

"You look just like your picture," Jongin laughs, still staring at Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo, uncomfortable with being looked at for too long, ducks his head, but he can't hide his smile.

"Hey, I'm bigger now," he argues half-heartedly.

"Barely, it seems," Jongin says with a soft smile. "C'mon. I ordered us drinks already. I got you a lemonade; I remember you said you liked that."

Kyungsoo blinks. "That was like, months ago, wasn't it?"

Jongin shrugs as if it isn't a big deal (it is). "Do you remember my favorite drink?" he asks instead.

"Coca cola," Kyungsoo replies without hesitating. He flushes when he realizes why Jongin asked, but Jongin only grins in response.

"I ordered us raisin bran cookies," Jongin continues, and Kyungsoo laughs aloud.

"You know I don't actually like those, right?" He can already feel himself easing into the conversation; talking with Jongin had always been easy for some reason. And despite his nervous feeling earlier, it was starting to fade away as Jongin coaxes him with familiar talk.

"What? But you said," Jongin replies, pouting. Kyungsoo can practically see the frowney emoticon in Jongin's words.

"I was joking," Kyungsoo chuckles. "But it's okay. We can share them."

Jongin smiles at that. "That was the plan."

Kyungsoo doesn't know how to reply to that, so he just pretends he isn't bright red as he changes the topic to something more comfortable: cats. As he shows Jongin more photos of cats on his phone ("I got some more before I came!"), he ignores Jongin's stares boring into him.

When their drinks show up, Kyungsoo is surprised there's only one drink.

"You didn't get something?" he asks.

"I did," Jongin replies with a grin. He picks up the two straws and puts them both into the lemonade bottle. Kyungsoo makes an 'o' shape with his mouth in understanding.

Kyungsoo can't tell if Jongin is a fast mover or not. Technically, they'd been flirting for months now, but this was their first meeting.

"I wanted to try something," Jongin says, disrupting Kyungsoo's thought.

"Hmm?" Kyungsoo asks, still dazed by Jongin's cookie-eating skills (or lack thereof, as visible through the crumbs on his lips).

"I mean, I've been wanting to try for a while, but you know, Internet dating has its downfalls," Jongin sighs.

Kyungsoo blinks. "What are you talking about?"

Jongin pops another piece of cookie into his mouth and chews. "You'll see," Jongin finally says, smiling. "Cookie?"

Kyungsoo shakes his head; his stomach is currently full of butterflies and does not want any food to disrupt it just yet. He misses the brief disappointed look on Jongin's face.

"Is your dance studio nearby?" Kyungsoo asks, changing the subject. He remembers Jongin mentioning that the walk wasn't too far from here.

"Yep, but there isn't practice today," Jongin replies. "Why? Do you want to come see me?" He's smiling, and Kyungsoo smiles back.

"Sure," he replies, and his stomach does backflips at the way Jongin's face brightens entirely.

"We have a singing department, too," Jongin offers, remembering Kyungsoo's mentioning of how he likes to sing. It was brief, but it never left Jongin's mind, and now, hearing his voice, he's sure his singing must be great.

Kyungsoo laughs and shakes his head. "No, I'll just visit you for now."

"Are you sure? I could get you in, you know. I have connections," he says with a wink, and Kyungsoo just flushes and hangs his head.

"Maybe," he sighs.

Jongin grins. Maybe is enough for now.

"You should really have some cookie," Jongin insists again. Kyungsoo stares for a moment. Truth be told, he really isn't the biggest fan of raisin bran cookies... but the look Jongin is giving him makes it hard for him to say no. He slowly takes a cookie and breaks off the piece, dropping it in his mouth.

"Oh, you got something on your mouth," Jongin says, and Kyungsoo frowns. He moves to wipe it but Jongin hurries and says, "I got it." He leans over and brushes away the 'crumbs,' letting his fingers linger.

"You know," he says, still touching Kyungsoo's face. "I didn't think the stupid online dating thing would work. I was like 99 percent sure it'd be full of creeps."

Kyungsoo wants to laugh and say he agrees, but it's a bit hard when Jongin is so close.

"But I'm glad I stayed on," Jongin admits with a soft smile. "You know, you're the only person I went out of my way to message?"

"Really?" Kyungsoo breathes.

"Yeah, your profile was just so funny," Jongin laughs, and Kyungsoo flushes even more. "And I'm glad I did."

They stare at each other for what seems like eternity, until Jongin finally blurts, "I'm going to kiss you."

Kyungsoo isn't an expert on romance, but he's pretty sure that was un-romantic. Still, the warning doesn't calm his racing heart as Jongin leans closer in until finally, their lips touch.

His lips feel better than they look, Kyungsoo thinks mindlessly, not even caring if it makes sense or not.

It's a chaste kiss, just a brush of the lips, but it still steals their breaths away.

"So... are we dating now?" Jongin asks slowly as they pull away, smile lingering on his lips.

"Asd-fgh-jkl," Kyungsoo replies without thinking.

Jongin stares. "Did you just- did you just keyboard smash me out loud?"

Kyungsoo blinks. "Is that not a thing?" From the look on Jongin's face, he can tell the answer is no. He's going to kill Chanyeol when he sees him.

"You really need to get out," Jongin chuckles as he reaches a hand out for Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo lets himself stop breathing to live in this moment.

-

Kyungsoo logs on to his dating profile to delete it once and for all, now that he no longer needs it. When he sees that Jongin's profile is still up, though, he curiously clicks on it, just for the laughs.

And boy, does Kyungsoo laugh.

i'm kai and i have a boyfriend now so you guys can stop messaging me pls. and kyungsoo, if you're reading this, my interests are addressed to you <3333
interests: dancing, cats, you

• fin.

a/n:
- itssogay because exo-k get it omg that's still one of my favorite jokes /bricked. and also there's no apostrophe for it's because urls can't have that u_u my grammar still be good ;A;
- if there are any mistakes, please point them out ;; i wrote this in like a couple of hours at night, with tlist distracting me, and idk typos are a given /sighs. i'll love you forever if you CC though, as always ^^
- thank you for reading!

genre: crack, fandom: exo, pairing: kai/kyungsoo, length: oneshot, genre: au, genre: humor, genre: romance

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