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[thisisherson]

[The post turns on, and enough time has passed between when Kurt arrived and now for his panic to turn into livid anger. His hands are firmly attached to his hips and he is not pleased.]

Excuse me, but what am I doing here? To the owner of this mansion - if you had actually requested my services instead of stealing me away like Mr. Ryerson

Comments

[Video] /t-tries

[hellyesamerica]

HEY!!

This is Wonderland!

[Video] ilu <3

[thisisherson]

[WATCH KURT NEARLY JUMP OUT OF HIS SKIN, WHO ON EARTH IS SCREAMING AT HIM AHHHH.

He puts himself back together though, and tries to look all dignified.]

Thank you, but breaking my eardrums was completely unnecessary.

[Video] <3

[hellyesamerica]

[What was that Kurt, she stopped listening after "Thank you."]

Sure thing! Did anyone else tell you what's going on around here? 'Cause, I'm kind of busy running around and saving people, but if you need help, I guess I have time.

SO WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

[Video]

[thisisherson]

[He's looking at her like she might bite him through the screen or something.]

...I'm Kurt. A couple of people have told me things. Are you really saving people? [Or just, you know, running around and giving them heart attacks. That seems more likely, somehow.]

[Video]

[hellyesamerica]

Kurt! Nice to meet you!

[She stands back a little and fixes that obnoxious red and white striped cape-scarf. Then, as if the following is explanation enough:]

Of course I am! I'm Meriken-- The United States of America!

[Video]

[thisisherson]

[He raises an eyebrow at her. It kind of disturbs him how meeting talking countries is becoming normal.]

Another nation? [He looks her up and down.] I guess I should have been able to tell from that gaudy cape. Disappointing, really. I was hoping my home nation would have better taste, being home to some of the greatest designers of the world. It's a shame.

[Video] 1/2?

[hellyesamerica]

[W-WHAT. SHE LOVES THIS DAMN CAPE.]

[Video] 2/3 I lied

[hellyesamerica]

FUCK YOU!

[Video]

[hellyesamerica]

This cape is amazing. You must be blind or something.

Besides! Have you seen what some of the other nations wear? It's so lame!! I'm definitely the best!

[Video] 1/2

[thisisherson]

[AAAND THE WIDE EYES ARE BACK. Maybe he shouldn't insult nations that are probably more powerful than him?]

[Video] 2/2

[thisisherson]

[...Nah. It has to be said.]

Please. If anything, that atrocious accessory blinded me, and should be regarded as a hazard to everyone's health.

Leave the capes to Superman. It'll help us all.

[Video]

[hellyesamerica]

[WATCH. WATCH AS THAT CHEERFUL SMILE TURNS INTO THIS FACE.]

Kurt, right?

Where are ya so I don't have to hunt you down?

[Video]

[thisisherson]

[OH DEAR GOD.

He doesn't even respond, but he makes a couple of scared little noises that kind of die in his throat. THEN HE JUST GETS UP AND LOCKS THE DOOR.]

[Video]

[hellyesamerica]

[There might be some evil laughing]

I can still see you! [By the way she's moving out the door at the speed of justice.]

[Video]

[thisisherson]

[WHAT IS THE SPEED OF JUSTICE EXACTLY?

He freaks out though, and scrambles to shut off the video. Action, y/n?]

[ACTION]

[hellyesamerica]

[HELL YEAH ACTION. The speed of justice actually varies by situation but in this case she's there already

pounding on your door.

Do not doubt her observant abilities]

TEN SECONDS TO OPEN THE DOOR BEFORE I MELT IT DOWN!