(Untitled)

[arcreactor]

Ok, so, apparently I'm a fictional character. Apparently, I have a pretty successful movie, that's out in theaters right now. Apparently, this should bother me or weird me out or whatever, but you know what

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[sergeantfury]

HOLY CRAP IT'S--

Did you just call Jarvis a computer, Mr Stark?

[arcreactor]

Tony Stark. Yeah. You can leave gifts of adoration outside of my door, preferably in the form of liquor. Unless, y'know, you know me because you want to kick my ass. And in that case, can you wait about a week? I'm a little sore after of the last guy who tried to hand my ass to me.

And, uh, yeah. JARVIS is the system my house and stuff runs on. Designed and built it myself, based on my father's old butler. Don't ask about the acronym, though, it's ... kinda lame.

[sergeantfury]

Nah, I hear I might want to do that once I get caught up on all the comics I've missed over the past four years, but since I haven't done that yet (and I'm not much of an ass-kicker anyway), beer and liquor it is. Maybe little chocolates, too. Wait, would that be too stalkerish? I won't bother with the stuffed animals, at least.

Based on? Dude, I have got to see your movie. I tried to find the theater we've apparently got here, and although I saw a unicorn, nada in the silver screen department.

[arcreactor]

Wait, I'm a comic, too? Ok, so, no one told me that. Very cool, but I wish I'dve known sooner. ... Not like it would make much of a difference, though, so. But beer and liquor wouldn't be too stalkerish. I could go for some chocolate. But yeah, the stuffed animals are pushing it. Pepper tried that once on my birthday and, well, it was weird even coming from my assistant.

I take it JARVIS wasn't my OS in these comics? And can't you download the movie off the internet or would the government guys here freak?

[sergeantfury]

You are like, the biggest thing in the Marvel comics universe. After Spiderman. And the X-men. And Captain America. And -- okay, you know what, you're just pretty big, except that movieverse is a totally different continuity. But it's still you. I think. Andrew could probably explain this better.

And no, he was a real guy. Old and British. I think everything cool has an old British guy. Anyway, I never tried that -- maybe they already have it on their weird little network ... but it's totally not the same thing as seeing it on the big screen.

[arcreactor]

Pretty sure I'm still me, if that helps any.

My father's butler was British, too. Kinda cocky. If he didn't like something, he'd tell you where to shove it. He usually backed down when dad or Obidiah, dick that he is, told him to, but ... he always had to put his two cents in.

You find a copy of the movie, and I can probably jury rig a projector and a screen, by the way. Can't say I'll sit down and watch it with you, because I don't really feel like reliving most of that crap, but there you go.

[sergeantfury]

He didn't turn out to be a Skrull, did he?

Sweet! I think I like movie-you better than comic-you already. I'll find a copy somehow, it's not like I've anything better to do these days.

[arcreactor]

Uh ... Skrull?

And yeah, me neither. I'm kinda entertaining the idea of demanding some kind of broken down vintage car I can work on, but I don't know how that'd go. In my experience, military guys suspect everything, so they'd probably think I was trying to rebuilt my gear and break outta here.

... Which might not be that bad an idea, actually.

[sergeantfury]

I guess they don't have those in movie world yet. Shape-shifting aliens.

I think there is one word to describe that potential scenario, and it is "epic". Anything I can do to help, say the word.

[arcreactor]

... Shape-shifting aliens. Right.

But yeah. I've been known for being epic. So, if you could point me in the direction of some paperwork for a car, that'd be cool. Even cooler if you could give me a hand at filling it out. I used to leave that kind of thing to Miss Potts, but she's not here. Is she?

I really hope I don't need my social to get stuff.

[sergeantfury]

Yes, sir! There's a little pile of the right forms outside O'Neill's office. I'll get a bunch for you so you can use them in future, too. You can never have too many request forms, that's what I say.

But no, no Miss Potts, and no Rhodey or Happy Hogan, either. It's a sad time we live in.