Sweet, sweet scrutiny
Yesterday it happened. Now maybe all of you who may be reading this haven't been quite in the loop in my general goings on, but there's been this thing developing who's depth hasn't been really fully made evident in this livejournal. The past few weeks, I've had this feeling in my heart that I just couldn't escape. It affected my day-to-day more than I ever thought it would, and yesterday... well, it just feels like it's time to let everyone know.
As of today, I am the proud owner of a brand-new, shiny black refrigerator. Our refrigerator we moved in with, fresh from the Salvation Army, chock full of a fragrance that can best be described as... like being trapped in a stuffy room with dead bodies, burnt hair, and the feces of several species (I bust rhymes about my fridges)... it's been replaced. It's being hauled away and replaced by the black stallion of food cooling and preservation. Don't be surprised if before the old one is taken away we just lay into it with hammers and crowbars a la Office Space.
Our food went bad... when Jackie and I talked, we talked about how to resolve this fridge issue and little else. Every few days, I'd find a new smell in the frige, and a carton full of something freshly lumpy. Notes were left: "LeAnn, your milk has gone bad. I am so sorry." You'd buy food that couldn't keep in cupboards, nor be useful in freezers, only when absolutely, positively necessary. Like sending soldiers to battle, you hoped for the best and prepared for the worst. "Dearest cheese, I cast you to this stuffy box, kept below room temperature only because of it's proximity to a (inexplicably functional) freezer. Only your God can help you now, and may he be merciful."
We researched the topic well. Jackie, Nile, myself, we can help you buy a fridge, because we are up to date on that shit. Small family? 18.2 cubic feet. Medium family? 21 cubic feet. Black or bisque? $20 more. Stainless steel? Which side do you need hinged? $140 more. Kenmore or Frigidaire? They're the same thing. Closeout because it was a display model? They won't deliver it. Did you say you wanted black? It's not in stock right now.
This is my post that's way too long because I'm so unbelievably excited about having a new refrigerator.
Alea, I'm posting at work... but my boss told me they aren't firing me... and you know I'm the kind of guy to ask about that.
Also, I had "super-smooth inspirational speaker" train conductor today. He literally talks to you the entire train ride. Just clicks in every few seconds, especially because today there were 20 min delays and it seems he was really trying to keep things smooth even though the train was absolutely at capacity. "Good mornin', good mornin', good mornin'! Boy, I was feelin' down this morning, but you all just lifted me up. Time to put your best foot forward, make this a better day. Don't even need the sun, because you people brighten my day. Turn to your neighbor and say, 'You look good, and I'm lookin' good too'. Keep that smile on, keep that smile on. Make room, we're all family. Let my family onboard, my loved ones, plenty of room. We're all neighbors, we got plenty of room. Come on in."
As of today, I am the proud owner of a brand-new, shiny black refrigerator. Our refrigerator we moved in with, fresh from the Salvation Army, chock full of a fragrance that can best be described as... like being trapped in a stuffy room with dead bodies, burnt hair, and the feces of several species (I bust rhymes about my fridges)... it's been replaced. It's being hauled away and replaced by the black stallion of food cooling and preservation. Don't be surprised if before the old one is taken away we just lay into it with hammers and crowbars a la Office Space.
Our food went bad... when Jackie and I talked, we talked about how to resolve this fridge issue and little else. Every few days, I'd find a new smell in the frige, and a carton full of something freshly lumpy. Notes were left: "LeAnn, your milk has gone bad. I am so sorry." You'd buy food that couldn't keep in cupboards, nor be useful in freezers, only when absolutely, positively necessary. Like sending soldiers to battle, you hoped for the best and prepared for the worst. "Dearest cheese, I cast you to this stuffy box, kept below room temperature only because of it's proximity to a (inexplicably functional) freezer. Only your God can help you now, and may he be merciful."
We researched the topic well. Jackie, Nile, myself, we can help you buy a fridge, because we are up to date on that shit. Small family? 18.2 cubic feet. Medium family? 21 cubic feet. Black or bisque? $20 more. Stainless steel? Which side do you need hinged? $140 more. Kenmore or Frigidaire? They're the same thing. Closeout because it was a display model? They won't deliver it. Did you say you wanted black? It's not in stock right now.
This is my post that's way too long because I'm so unbelievably excited about having a new refrigerator.
Alea, I'm posting at work... but my boss told me they aren't firing me... and you know I'm the kind of guy to ask about that.
Also, I had "super-smooth inspirational speaker" train conductor today. He literally talks to you the entire train ride. Just clicks in every few seconds, especially because today there were 20 min delays and it seems he was really trying to keep things smooth even though the train was absolutely at capacity. "Good mornin', good mornin', good mornin'! Boy, I was feelin' down this morning, but you all just lifted me up. Time to put your best foot forward, make this a better day. Don't even need the sun, because you people brighten my day. Turn to your neighbor and say, 'You look good, and I'm lookin' good too'. Keep that smile on, keep that smile on. Make room, we're all family. Let my family onboard, my loved ones, plenty of room. We're all neighbors, we got plenty of room. Come on in."