Peek-a-boo!

[thisdreamisover]

It seems that I have been neglecting my dear livejournal. I just have nothing to post that is of any real interest to anyone other than close friends. Plus I don't really have the time or energy to do so anymore. Ive been working a lot. I get up around 8am take care of the house, try and sleep more, eat and shower, then go to work. I come home around 1am if im lucky and sit online thinking about updating. But I don't But there is so much that I want to say. But I don't to, not here, not so I can look back and regret it. Plus I just dont know who i want knowing certain things anymore. Its all just my hopes and my stupid little rants and things I know will never happen. But Ive been really happy lately, I havent been this way in a long while. Its prolly just cause ive been ignoring relaity, I know the truth but I just don't accept it. I don't really want to I guess, cause I don't need that pain again. It just dosent help that My false fantasies are being renforced, this is preventing my from accepting reality. I like living in this reality cause it makes me happy. But Its not healthy, I know that. But this feeling I have makes it feel worth while. I guess to me that makes it ok. Least Im happy at work so its fun and not "work". I was suposed to have 4 days off but I took mary's hours for tomorrow cause Im a sucker for money. Hey the pup needs to go to the vet and get his ear fixed and his coconuts cut off. But maybe Ill get to work woth fun people tomorow. I hope at least Scott or Sara is there. This entry is a lot longer than I had anticipated. But I prolly wont update for a while again. But there is so much more I want to say but I wont in here. I think I shall make a group so the people I can get advice from particaular people and there are only a few that I don't mind knowing certain things. I tend to be secretive about things anymore, my deep trust issues are comming through again. But I think Im going to wrap this up Ive wasted enough of your time already. But before i go I thought this was interesting.
"Im not slacking, I just working as little as possible"~Scott
Well Im going to try and get to sleep soon.
See ya later kiddies