no subject
i felt like i was breaking down tonight
i have/had already come to terms with what was going to happen
but i just couldn't help letting it get to me tonight.
i don't want her moving to california
i don't want her moving anywhere but in with me, in our own house,with our little black lab (and the list goes on)
i cant stand the thought of not being able to drive under 10 hours one-way to see her. its bad enough she lives 5 (8 for me ha!)
even though we have promised to visit.
i want to see her everyday, i want to be able to hug her, to look in her eyes...
most of everyone else i know can do that (and they take it for granted)
i cant even say i can do that now. But i do cherish every second i spend with her.
i honestly want to spend the rest of my life with her. (not imagine, but want)
its going to drive me mad not being able to see her smile.
oh how i love the way she smiles.
she makes me so happy, i could go on for days about the way she makes me feel.
But i cant be selfish, and i want to see her happy.
i cant make her stay for me. i want her to pursue the things she has always dreamed of. she deserves it (and i never deserved her)
but i hope her dreams come true
because she made mine.