(no subject)
hey. i've had to bite my lip a lot these last few months. i've alluded to the fact that certain things aren't going so well right now. i guess how hard it hits me is really off and on, daily.
ok. so what i'm talking about is a series of shitty things happening to me at pretty much the same time. i don't know why i'm writing about them, because i'm sure that no one cares. no, no, you don't.
so, i'm leaving my house soon, with my mother, for good. i pretty much won't have a family in less than 2 weeks. the relationship with the only serious girlfriend i've ever had has ended. i can not believe how insecure i've become. i'm very much in debt and the only way to cover this, is by working way too much to be healthy and go to school. i feel that i'm the bigger person when it comes to every confronting situation i'm ever in. i let it go and i don't give a fuck simply to spare the opposing side feelings of unhappiness. i've had an on off/love hate relationship with both of my brothers since i was in middle school because they have shit on me more times than the toilet. when i say hate, i really mean hate. i used to have add. i'm getting surgery for bowel problems that have made me sick every day for the last year.
and see, the thing is, is that i'll read livejournal every day and sure enough people are complaining about mundane shit. after all that, i can still realize that i love my life and the friends i see everyday and the ones that i'm meeting and the good times i have. i don't fucking sulk all day and night trying to make everyone feel bad for me.
"it's all about taking the easy way out for you, i suppose"
ok. so what i'm talking about is a series of shitty things happening to me at pretty much the same time. i don't know why i'm writing about them, because i'm sure that no one cares. no, no, you don't.
so, i'm leaving my house soon, with my mother, for good. i pretty much won't have a family in less than 2 weeks. the relationship with the only serious girlfriend i've ever had has ended. i can not believe how insecure i've become. i'm very much in debt and the only way to cover this, is by working way too much to be healthy and go to school. i feel that i'm the bigger person when it comes to every confronting situation i'm ever in. i let it go and i don't give a fuck simply to spare the opposing side feelings of unhappiness. i've had an on off/love hate relationship with both of my brothers since i was in middle school because they have shit on me more times than the toilet. when i say hate, i really mean hate. i used to have add. i'm getting surgery for bowel problems that have made me sick every day for the last year.
and see, the thing is, is that i'll read livejournal every day and sure enough people are complaining about mundane shit. after all that, i can still realize that i love my life and the friends i see everyday and the ones that i'm meeting and the good times i have. i don't fucking sulk all day and night trying to make everyone feel bad for me.
"it's all about taking the easy way out for you, i suppose"