however, on a lighter note...
i made a buddy at church today named nicole. and i have a babysitting job mon-fri this week. i think i'll buy a new cd with the money =) or maybe get started on paying my mom back... or the bank... but anyway, i may not be so life-threateningly bored this week! and i'm still looking forward to moving to mobile. i know who my real friends are, and i'm willing to face the fact that my "real friends" list hardly even comes close to the numbers of my "friends" list... angela is a true friend. hayley is a true friend. matt is a true friend even though he's got his own loooong list of problems; we're always there for eachother, no matter what. the three of them (and a few others) have stuck with me even when i had absolutely nothing at all to offer them other than company (and not always positive, sunshiny company either)... but really, i'm ok with that. i'm going to go home, get my apartment, get another car (oh i will be soooo happy when i finally have a car again) and carry on with my life. i'm very optimistic about it. "fuck the naysayers cause they don't mean a thing" to quote 311... hehe!
a thought just occurred to me... that one phrase, "no matter what" is what relationships should be built on. if you can't say "no matter what" and mean it, stick with your real friends or either stick to yourself. because if you can't make that sort of commitment, you shouldn't let people think they can count on you. i've always had a very marriage-like view of friendship... for better or worse, in sickness and health, for richer or poorer, till death (or a man) do you part... not a vow before god type thing, but just a commitment to fucking BE there for your pals when they need you. not every girl can be so lucky and manipulative as to brainwash a guy to stay with them and keep them company when their girlfriends run off.
i'm ranting again. somebody make me stop.
oh, p.s. not all girls are manipulative and tricky, just about 95% of them. i am, that's why i'm single. until i train myself to not be a "big scary female" i prefer to stay single. as soon as i can be a sweet, submissive little flower of a lady.... then i'll be on the prowl haha...
a thought just occurred to me... that one phrase, "no matter what" is what relationships should be built on. if you can't say "no matter what" and mean it, stick with your real friends or either stick to yourself. because if you can't make that sort of commitment, you shouldn't let people think they can count on you. i've always had a very marriage-like view of friendship... for better or worse, in sickness and health, for richer or poorer, till death (or a man) do you part... not a vow before god type thing, but just a commitment to fucking BE there for your pals when they need you. not every girl can be so lucky and manipulative as to brainwash a guy to stay with them and keep them company when their girlfriends run off.
i'm ranting again. somebody make me stop.
oh, p.s. not all girls are manipulative and tricky, just about 95% of them. i am, that's why i'm single. until i train myself to not be a "big scary female" i prefer to stay single. as soon as i can be a sweet, submissive little flower of a lady.... then i'll be on the prowl haha...