(no subject)
giving up on this is what im really most interested in. this relationship that seems to never be what i want it so desperatly to be. with all of the promises that have been made and all the words and hopes and dreams out in the open, youd think that this would be going much smoother. however, in my eyes, its just getting more and more difficult. i think im old enough now to not have to go about things like this. putting up the front that you are going to the gym when you are really coming to see me, only talking to me on your cell phone when you are outside and out of ear shot, never ever staying over, i dont know why i cant just put a stop to this. this isnt the way i want my life to work. i just dont know what to do about any of it.