(no subject)
These journals seem to be fading, or something. So I reckon it's kind of dumb to be writing this if it's just going to disappear. But then, maybe it's good. Maybe if I put the things here that I can't really say out loud, and they fade, then maybe the stuff that the words are about will fade some too and it won't hurt so much.
He left a note before he went. Hermione and I found it yesterday when we were packing up his things.
I know you'll both be angry about this, so I won't tell you not to be. You guys remember first year, when you stayed behind to help each other and I went in after Quirrel. You trusted me. I need to make it stop, one way or another, and I don't see any reason I should lose either of my best friends in the process. I'll be back before you know it... don't be mad. Save me some supper.
-Harry
He knew Hermione and I would have wanted to go with him. I was angry with him at first for going without us but now I think he was right. I would have stopped him, cause I'm selfish. I would have wanted to have him safe even if that meant Voldemort would be alive. I reckon Harry knew Hermione and me better than we knew ourselves sometimes.
Burying Harry was the hardest thing I ever did. He was my best mate and for the last seven years we did everything together and with Hermione. We got into more trouble than it ought to be allowed for three people to get into. It was going to be that way forever. We had plans for things, and the things we didn't have plans for we were going to have a hell of a time figuring out. Those things aren't happening now. Harry and Hermione aren't getting a flat near me, and I'm not going to floo over to beat his arse in chess every night (he was a crap player), and we aren't going to go for strawberry-peanut butter ice cream anymore, and Harry's not going to sneak the last of the treacle tart when I'm not looking, and a lot of other things I don't want to write cause I don't want to keep thinking about them if they're never going to happen.
What I really want to do is remember the stuff he taught me. Because if I forget it, and I let other people forget it, then what Harry died for doesn't mean shite.
He taught me that it's ok to be scared of a word as long as I don't let it stop me from saying it anway. It's okay to be scared of anything really - only stupid people aren't scared - what matters is getting over the scared. He taught me that the best thing you have is your word. And he taught me that you have to always make sure the truth is heard, no matter what it takes.
Harry might be gone but if he thought I was sitting around moping he'd probably come and haunt me or something and I'd deserve it. He'd want me to get off my arse and do something. So yesterday I went and got a flat. Hermione's going to come and stay with me for a bit cause I don't think either of us wants to stay by ourselves right now. I'm going to start my job in two weeks. I'm going to spend lots of time with Luna and my family cause I'm lucky to have them.
And I'm going to remember that if it wasn't for Harry, I wouldn't be able to do it.
I miss you, mate.
He left a note before he went. Hermione and I found it yesterday when we were packing up his things.
I know you'll both be angry about this, so I won't tell you not to be. You guys remember first year, when you stayed behind to help each other and I went in after Quirrel. You trusted me. I need to make it stop, one way or another, and I don't see any reason I should lose either of my best friends in the process. I'll be back before you know it... don't be mad. Save me some supper.
-Harry
He knew Hermione and I would have wanted to go with him. I was angry with him at first for going without us but now I think he was right. I would have stopped him, cause I'm selfish. I would have wanted to have him safe even if that meant Voldemort would be alive. I reckon Harry knew Hermione and me better than we knew ourselves sometimes.
Burying Harry was the hardest thing I ever did. He was my best mate and for the last seven years we did everything together and with Hermione. We got into more trouble than it ought to be allowed for three people to get into. It was going to be that way forever. We had plans for things, and the things we didn't have plans for we were going to have a hell of a time figuring out. Those things aren't happening now. Harry and Hermione aren't getting a flat near me, and I'm not going to floo over to beat his arse in chess every night (he was a crap player), and we aren't going to go for strawberry-peanut butter ice cream anymore, and Harry's not going to sneak the last of the treacle tart when I'm not looking, and a lot of other things I don't want to write cause I don't want to keep thinking about them if they're never going to happen.
What I really want to do is remember the stuff he taught me. Because if I forget it, and I let other people forget it, then what Harry died for doesn't mean shite.
He taught me that it's ok to be scared of a word as long as I don't let it stop me from saying it anway. It's okay to be scared of anything really - only stupid people aren't scared - what matters is getting over the scared. He taught me that the best thing you have is your word. And he taught me that you have to always make sure the truth is heard, no matter what it takes.
Harry might be gone but if he thought I was sitting around moping he'd probably come and haunt me or something and I'd deserve it. He'd want me to get off my arse and do something. So yesterday I went and got a flat. Hermione's going to come and stay with me for a bit cause I don't think either of us wants to stay by ourselves right now. I'm going to start my job in two weeks. I'm going to spend lots of time with Luna and my family cause I'm lucky to have them.
And I'm going to remember that if it wasn't for Harry, I wouldn't be able to do it.
I miss you, mate.