a song tonight
i was looking through the photo albums and just remembering how very happy it all was.
how much i loved every second, was conscious of every second and how i loved the learning and the knowledge and the people and the classrooms, all the outfits and parties and corsages to order.
i hate it every day here. and there is nowhere to go, truly.
i remember spending the entire weekend trying to find some part of that place where i felt good about it. we sat on the steep hill and listened to kingsley and nathaniel and max; sarah and i rubbed out feet in the grass, i worked on the clay wall for hours. we ran out of encores for gospel choir.
and i watched them sing and sing and sway together, some unbelievable harmony and motion of this beautiful group so fully united for all time.
and i miss it all and i want it back and i am so tired of feeling half empty half alive
these things are not right they cannot be fixed with plane rides and transfer forms.
there is no fixing
how much i loved every second, was conscious of every second and how i loved the learning and the knowledge and the people and the classrooms, all the outfits and parties and corsages to order.
i hate it every day here. and there is nowhere to go, truly.
i remember spending the entire weekend trying to find some part of that place where i felt good about it. we sat on the steep hill and listened to kingsley and nathaniel and max; sarah and i rubbed out feet in the grass, i worked on the clay wall for hours. we ran out of encores for gospel choir.
and i watched them sing and sing and sway together, some unbelievable harmony and motion of this beautiful group so fully united for all time.
and i miss it all and i want it back and i am so tired of feeling half empty half alive
these things are not right they cannot be fixed with plane rides and transfer forms.
there is no fixing