Spiritual Epiphany
In the line for the McDonald's drive-thru while listening to NPR an epiphany hit me. I'm trying to write this down on my lunch break, so I haven't had much time to gather my thoughts and organize them to make them coherent yet, but I'll try to do the best I can.
I've been pretty agnostic basically most of my conscious life, but I think that's because I've been looking at it all wrong. I don't think the God that the Judo-Christianity religions believe is the kind of divine/deity type of being we need to think of. Do I believe in an all powerful, all knowing, all good deity? I'm thinking no. Do I believe in some kind of spiritualness in the world now? I might.
I think we underestimate coincidences. We just let them act like their no biggie, but I think it's actual divine intervention, or something along those lines. There's something out there that connects us all and causes some coincidences while leaving us with a good perception that we have free will.
The beauty part is I can point out where this spiritual whatever-stuff is. On the quantum level there are giant gaps of space inside an atom between the nucleus and electrons and all that jazz. In this vacuum is where I believe we can find our "God," and it's found in every atom in every bit of matter. It's the same in everything and connects us all.
I'm still a materialist though. I still believe that consciousness and what makes up a person is all physical matter. I don't believe this deity found in vacuums contradicts that. I don't think the god defines who we are or can make us change, but I do believe it connects all of us.
This is going to sound stupid, but my biggest spiritual moment in my life is when I was standing there in the dorms damning God and being blasphemous like I usually do, just joking around, and I turned around and ran into a door. I thought it ironic, but just perceived it as a coincidence. Perhaps that was just the spirit of the world teaching me a lesson.
Eastern religions always talk about how everything is connected, and I'm thinking this might be how.
There's more I want to say, but I need to really sit down and think about it and get it all organized.
I hope that makes some kind of sense in its own sporadic way.
p.s. I was only calling it "god" to give it a name, but I think it something completely different.
I've been pretty agnostic basically most of my conscious life, but I think that's because I've been looking at it all wrong. I don't think the God that the Judo-Christianity religions believe is the kind of divine/deity type of being we need to think of. Do I believe in an all powerful, all knowing, all good deity? I'm thinking no. Do I believe in some kind of spiritualness in the world now? I might.
I think we underestimate coincidences. We just let them act like their no biggie, but I think it's actual divine intervention, or something along those lines. There's something out there that connects us all and causes some coincidences while leaving us with a good perception that we have free will.
The beauty part is I can point out where this spiritual whatever-stuff is. On the quantum level there are giant gaps of space inside an atom between the nucleus and electrons and all that jazz. In this vacuum is where I believe we can find our "God," and it's found in every atom in every bit of matter. It's the same in everything and connects us all.
I'm still a materialist though. I still believe that consciousness and what makes up a person is all physical matter. I don't believe this deity found in vacuums contradicts that. I don't think the god defines who we are or can make us change, but I do believe it connects all of us.
This is going to sound stupid, but my biggest spiritual moment in my life is when I was standing there in the dorms damning God and being blasphemous like I usually do, just joking around, and I turned around and ran into a door. I thought it ironic, but just perceived it as a coincidence. Perhaps that was just the spirit of the world teaching me a lesson.
Eastern religions always talk about how everything is connected, and I'm thinking this might be how.
There's more I want to say, but I need to really sit down and think about it and get it all organized.
I hope that makes some kind of sense in its own sporadic way.
p.s. I was only calling it "god" to give it a name, but I think it something completely different.