I Remember When The Days Were Long And The Nights When The Living Room Was On The Lawn
i really cant put what i feel into words anymore. it kind of bothers me. now, im not sure if what i feel has just gotten to be more complicated, or maybe i just lost a touch, or maybe i never had a touch to begin with and its just something ive built up in my head to make the past seem better than it was. for some reason i hope its that im holding back.
ive kind of got back into a groove that i know oh too well. maybe ill elaborate more on this later, probably not.
today was my eighteenth birthday. and before you get all excited let me assure you that it did not consist of anything special. my brother called me at exactly twelve oclock this morning to wish me a happy birthday, and i love him for it. then i finally got to bed, cause i was up thinking about something. i was actually thinking about writing in this last night, it might have made for a better entry. whenever i cant sleep, i really enjoy what i write. well anyway i got a jacket, a pair of socks, and some jeans. i like it alright, but i dont know. its like there was something i was expecting to get that would make my day. i dont even know what it was, cause i didnt want anything in the first place. its wierd, i cant help but have lousy birthdays. and its not even that the day itself is lousy. i just get into this mood where really nothing is going to get me out of it, most likely cause im just a selfish prick more than anything, but i dont know. i haven't done much for school this week. i'm really uninspired as of lately to do anything at all.
im more than likely going to cheer up by the weekend, cause its just shaping up to be a good weekend. single days are starting to have the habit of making my week. i have a good idea to why that is, but i'll get to that at some later time.
i wish all my friends got along. and i wish no one blamed anyone. and i wish me saying this would make a difference, but it won't.
ive kind of got back into a groove that i know oh too well. maybe ill elaborate more on this later, probably not.
today was my eighteenth birthday. and before you get all excited let me assure you that it did not consist of anything special. my brother called me at exactly twelve oclock this morning to wish me a happy birthday, and i love him for it. then i finally got to bed, cause i was up thinking about something. i was actually thinking about writing in this last night, it might have made for a better entry. whenever i cant sleep, i really enjoy what i write. well anyway i got a jacket, a pair of socks, and some jeans. i like it alright, but i dont know. its like there was something i was expecting to get that would make my day. i dont even know what it was, cause i didnt want anything in the first place. its wierd, i cant help but have lousy birthdays. and its not even that the day itself is lousy. i just get into this mood where really nothing is going to get me out of it, most likely cause im just a selfish prick more than anything, but i dont know. i haven't done much for school this week. i'm really uninspired as of lately to do anything at all.
im more than likely going to cheer up by the weekend, cause its just shaping up to be a good weekend. single days are starting to have the habit of making my week. i have a good idea to why that is, but i'll get to that at some later time.
i wish all my friends got along. and i wish no one blamed anyone. and i wish me saying this would make a difference, but it won't.