070; Plenty to say...
You know, I've never had any trouble putting things down on here. At first I found that kind of strange, because I've never kept a journal (I'm not the type) and I've never really talked about what I was thinking (Kir can attest) but it's different here. So if this seems kind of long, sorry.
In just about a week, I'll have been here for six months. A couple of you who are still around know I was the first one the Indigeo found and brought here. At least, the compound was empty when I showed up, so if there was anyone before me, they were already gone. It's kind of a dubious "honour" and I've been thinking about it lately. Maybe because of all the recent disappearances. There's been... what, a dozen in the last few days? Watching and hearing people who've lost a roommate, or a friend, or someone close...
Heh, Yuuko's said more than once that this place changes people. For some it's easier to tell, and in my case, I guess it's kind of blatantly obvious damned black marks but she's right. None of us were supposed to be in this situation and yet here we are. None of us will just go back to our lives when this is over. I think, even if we don't remember, we'll still know. And that could be good or bad.
I've made too many good friends to regret coming here, no matter what happens and no matter what has already happened. The good outweighs the bad, for me.
[Screened to Cassis]
I'm not mad at you for going to help Argentine and I'm not mad at you for leaving Ast-Tessera to do so. It's like... it's like when you went to see Yuuko. I just automatically jumped to the worst possible outcome and... well, you know.
But isn't he that creepy guy who's been following you around?? Jeez... you couldn't have gotten sentimental over someone who's NOT your stalker?!
[/Screened]
[Screened to Kir]
Hey, partner? With this mist gone, are you...? Or did it stay, like mine?
[/Screened]
[Screened to Mint]
I know I said it before, but thank you. For understanding, for everything. I wish I knew how to give back even a fraction of the altruism you show me.
[/Screened]
[Private // Hackable]
It's harder to push to the back of my mind anymore, with all the recent happenings. I have been lucky so far and no one I'm close to has disappeared, but... how long will that luck hold? If Mint or Cassis or Kir... Genis or Luke or Yuuko or Atem...
I'm being so selfish. I wouldn't be the only one to miss them, the only one to be hurt if they left, but that's how I feel. Because I would feel that they left me instead of everyone, even though that's arrogant and shallow. I know I'm not so important as that.
But it scares me anyway. So much for being fearless.
[/Private]
Edited shortly thereafter: DAMN! I went to check on Al, and our new roommate, Hanyuu... her stuff is all gone. She's disappeared too. I...
Is this my fault?
In just about a week, I'll have been here for six months. A couple of you who are still around know I was the first one the Indigeo found and brought here. At least, the compound was empty when I showed up, so if there was anyone before me, they were already gone. It's kind of a dubious "honour" and I've been thinking about it lately. Maybe because of all the recent disappearances. There's been... what, a dozen in the last few days? Watching and hearing people who've lost a roommate, or a friend, or someone close...
Heh, Yuuko's said more than once that this place changes people. For some it's easier to tell, and in my case, I guess it's kind of blatantly obvious damned black marks but she's right. None of us were supposed to be in this situation and yet here we are. None of us will just go back to our lives when this is over. I think, even if we don't remember, we'll still know. And that could be good or bad.
I've made too many good friends to regret coming here, no matter what happens and no matter what has already happened. The good outweighs the bad, for me.
[Screened to Cassis]
I'm not mad at you for going to help Argentine and I'm not mad at you for leaving Ast-Tessera to do so. It's like... it's like when you went to see Yuuko. I just automatically jumped to the worst possible outcome and... well, you know.
But isn't he that creepy guy who's been following you around?? Jeez... you couldn't have gotten sentimental over someone who's NOT your stalker?!
[/Screened]
[Screened to Kir]
Hey, partner? With this mist gone, are you...? Or did it stay, like mine?
[/Screened]
[Screened to Mint]
I know I said it before, but thank you. For understanding, for everything. I wish I knew how to give back even a fraction of the altruism you show me.
[/Screened]
[Private // Hackable]
It's harder to push to the back of my mind anymore, with all the recent happenings. I have been lucky so far and no one I'm close to has disappeared, but... how long will that luck hold? If Mint or Cassis or Kir... Genis or Luke or Yuuko or Atem...
I'm being so selfish. I wouldn't be the only one to miss them, the only one to be hurt if they left, but that's how I feel. Because I would feel that they left me instead of everyone, even though that's arrogant and shallow. I know I'm not so important as that.
But it scares me anyway. So much for being fearless.
[/Private]
Edited shortly thereafter: DAMN! I went to check on Al, and our new roommate, Hanyuu... her stuff is all gone. She's disappeared too. I...
Is this my fault?