Visiting the Parents: Busiest of Saturdays
I went in for my second massage ever yesterday, as my mother hooked me up with a free one with her regular masseur, and I thought it might be prudent what with the recent constant back sprains. I'm not sure what qualifies as "deep tissue massage" but it was certainly intense. If you're familiar with that scene in Futurama where the professor goes to the spa planet and his skin turns to silly puddy under the ministrations of the squid masseuse, it was like that.
The conversation ended up being a little weird. I was asking a lot of odd questions, such as "Do you have to do any strength training in your arms or do you build up endurance naturally?" (the latter) and "Can you tell whether a person is right or left-handed by the muscles in their hands and arms?" (he's picked up on a couple of lefties, but for the most part, no).
Then he got onto the subject of how much his wife loves the Twilight franchise, which led to discussions of placenta-eating (I... may be misremembering what I've read about Twilight), which led to perhaps the strangest sentence I've heard all week: "Well, at the very least placenta has to be better than mustard."
It would have made more sense had I known beforehand that he loathed mustard, though I did gather as much from his statement.
Fun factoid: pressing on the gluts and hips during massage causes most people's muscles to "kick back" (twitch like crazy), including mine. Masseur-guy said it is because most people are unaccustomed to being touched there, which made me laugh in imagining a world where people greet each other with ass-squeezes. I also pointed out that inter-office grab-ass tournaments aren't really en vogue these days.
I ended this highly productive day by watching Harold & Kumar Go To Whitecastle, which I had never seen before. As opposed to, say, Pineapple Express, this one probably does require pot for optimal viewing. Alas. It was still worth the price of admission for Neil Patrick Harris tripping balls. Also for the line "Bullets! My only weakness. How did you know?" which is beautiful to me.
I guess NPH does not appear on unicorn-back until the second movie?
My mother seemed to enjoy it, though, and she does not normally sit through movies.
The conversation ended up being a little weird. I was asking a lot of odd questions, such as "Do you have to do any strength training in your arms or do you build up endurance naturally?" (the latter) and "Can you tell whether a person is right or left-handed by the muscles in their hands and arms?" (he's picked up on a couple of lefties, but for the most part, no).
Then he got onto the subject of how much his wife loves the Twilight franchise, which led to discussions of placenta-eating (I... may be misremembering what I've read about Twilight), which led to perhaps the strangest sentence I've heard all week: "Well, at the very least placenta has to be better than mustard."
It would have made more sense had I known beforehand that he loathed mustard, though I did gather as much from his statement.
Fun factoid: pressing on the gluts and hips during massage causes most people's muscles to "kick back" (twitch like crazy), including mine. Masseur-guy said it is because most people are unaccustomed to being touched there, which made me laugh in imagining a world where people greet each other with ass-squeezes. I also pointed out that inter-office grab-ass tournaments aren't really en vogue these days.
I ended this highly productive day by watching Harold & Kumar Go To Whitecastle, which I had never seen before. As opposed to, say, Pineapple Express, this one probably does require pot for optimal viewing. Alas. It was still worth the price of admission for Neil Patrick Harris tripping balls. Also for the line "Bullets! My only weakness. How did you know?" which is beautiful to me.
I guess NPH does not appear on unicorn-back until the second movie?
My mother seemed to enjoy it, though, and she does not normally sit through movies.