What I Really Am: Chapter 8 Part two.
Ryan's POV
Brendon and I end up kissing on my bed. I grab his forearms, breaking the kiss, and he flinches away from my hands. What did I do to him? Fuck.
"Bren, what did I do?" He just rubs his wrist gently, afraid to hurt it.
"Nothing, babe," he whispers. He leans in and kisses me passionately. I flick my tongue at the bottom of his lip. His mouth opens and pretty soon we're full on making out, him propped up above me. He pulls away again, making his way down my neck to my collarbone. Brendon kisses it, nibbles it, I don't even know, but whatever he's doing feels fucking great. A small moan escapes my lips, and I tilt my head back. He takes this opportunity to move his hands from beside me to just under my shirt. He rubs my bony hips with the pad of his thumb and oh my God, I really fucking love this. His hands make their way up my shirt, and he stops kissing me to ask,
"Do you want this?" Yes. I really, really, REALLY do.
'YES!' I try even squeak. Nothing comes out. I not fervently and smile slightly.
Now more than ever I REALLY hope Brendon knows what he's doing.
I sure as hell don't.
His hands find the hem of my v-neck and soon it's on the ground. He rubs his hand on my thigh before undoing the button to my jeans.
I don't even realize it until now, those jeans were really constricting me. I am so fucking hard. Something is pressed up against me, and I look down--
I guess Brendon is too.
Slowly, he unzips them and pulls them off, before I unzip his jacket. They join the pile of discarded clothes on the ground. He slips off his polo shirt and jeans.
We're down to just a thin layer of breezy cotton separating us.
This is really happening.
I don't know why, but I hesitate. "Bren?"
"Yeah?" he says, confused look on his face. "What's the matter? If you want to sto-"
"No, not that. Have, like, have you ever done... this before?" He blushes a little, then looks at me smiling just a little.
"No..." he hesitates
"I'm glad you are my first."
Oh. His first.
As in he's a virgin too.
This is getting even better.
That's fucking great.
He kisses me, this time a little more lustfully as he sucks my lip in-between his. The kiss is all tongue and teeth bumping but we're too caught up in the ecstasy of the moment to even remotely care. Brendon kisses my Adam's apple and then looks at me.
"Are you ready?"
"Yeah," I breathe. Sure as hell. I love him, he loves me.
It's plain and simple. Or so I thought.
"Top or bottom," he says. I don't know. Who does what? I'm not too up-to-date with my sex-ed, considering all I knew up until now is that it supposedly felt really good. REALLY good.
Oh, and that when a boy and girl had sex, that's how babies were made.
I didn't think about that. Um.
"Top or bottom," he repeats, grinning mockingly at me as I lay there, utterly confused. He's laughing, that motherfucker!
"Whatever you want, babe," I say smirking. By this point, I am horny as fuck.
Fuck.
Brendon loops his fingers around the elastic on his boxers and just like the rest of his clothes, they now lay on the ground. He looks really hot naked.
I feel myself get even harder, if that's possible. He kisses me, ridding of the final layer of clothes left between us. His bare skin touches mine, and heat is coiling in my stomach. I've never felt this way towards anyone. Ever.
He shifts us to where I'm on top of him, and he is on his back below me, looking stunning as always with his full lips, deep brown eyes, and swooping dark bangs. He leans in and kisses me.
"Bren? C-can you like, tell me what to do? So I don't screw this up?" He looks at me and smiles genuinely.
"Of course," he says. "Prep or..?"
"Do you want it?" He nods. "Then yes." He takes two of my fingers, middle and index, into his mouth. Once he removes them, I lean over him. I can't watch this part. I kiss his neck as I push the first finger in. Soon after comes the second, probably trembling slightly because oh my God, I am so fucking nervous.
Brendon is holding back a pained moan. I can tell. "Just, just move them around. I'm fine. Ry, just don't worry." I follow his orders and after wiggling them around a bit, Brendon lets out another moan.
This time, it isn't because it hurts. "Oh God, Ry. Oh--FUCK!" He says as I brush it again. "I'm ready." He says looking at me, and I nod. I remove my fingers and wipe them on my thin, scratchy sheets. I know what I'm supposed to do now. I take a gulp, squeeze my eyes shut, and let out a ragged breath as I line up with his entrance.
Breathe in.
I push the tip in, and he gasps a little bit.
Breathe out.
Holding onto his hips, I push in the rest of the way.
Breathe in.
He wraps his legs around my hips, pulling us even closer together.
Breathe out.
I give him a moment to get comfortable while I calm myself down.
Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in--
"Ryan?" Brendon looks up, worried. "Are you... are you scared?"
"N-no, I'm fine. I just don't want to mess this up. It's our first time, and... yeah." I bite my lip and then look at him.
"Okay, you ready?" He nods. 1, 2, 3...
I slowly pull back and push in again, building up a slow, steady rhythm. Brendon seems to get comfortable, because he seems to be enjoying it. Me, on the other hand, well...
I feel amazing. Fantastic, blissful, just about all of these in one.
Good was NOT even big enough a word to describe how this felt. Brendon is so fucking tight, and oh my God. The sounds he makes are hot. They don't help. Brendon moans and then looks at me, face scrunched up in concentration and pleasure.
"I'm close," he says, voice raw.
"Me, yeah.. Me- too." I don't think I can last much longer. Brendon has his head buried into the crook of my neck, and all of a sudden he freezes up and digs his nails into my back.
"Fuck!" he yells a stream of obscenities as he comes, all over our stomachs. His muscles tightened around me, and oh God.
That pretty much did it for me.
"Bren, I- I'm gonna--" and I don't even finish the word before I come. White flashes in my eyes and my toes curl and shit, does this feel good. I pull out after a second, and we lay here, on my old twin bed, arms and legs woven together. We're both panting, and there's a sheen of sweat on my forehead.
He's tracing shapes into my hip with his thumb and my head it on his shoulder. We're naked, but everything below the hips is covered in my comforter. I breathe him in, sweet and intoxicating, and before I can think, it's slipping out. What I wanted to tell him for a while now.
"I love you, Bren." He looks at me. His eyes are twinkling, maybe from tears building up or from happiness, I can't tell.
"I love you too, Ry."
-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-
A/N: WOW THAT TOOK FOREVER TO WRITE Dx
But I hope it does the boys justice, I mean c'mon,
they both just lost their v-cards...
Brendon and I end up kissing on my bed. I grab his forearms, breaking the kiss, and he flinches away from my hands. What did I do to him? Fuck.
"Bren, what did I do?" He just rubs his wrist gently, afraid to hurt it.
"Nothing, babe," he whispers. He leans in and kisses me passionately. I flick my tongue at the bottom of his lip. His mouth opens and pretty soon we're full on making out, him propped up above me. He pulls away again, making his way down my neck to my collarbone. Brendon kisses it, nibbles it, I don't even know, but whatever he's doing feels fucking great. A small moan escapes my lips, and I tilt my head back. He takes this opportunity to move his hands from beside me to just under my shirt. He rubs my bony hips with the pad of his thumb and oh my God, I really fucking love this. His hands make their way up my shirt, and he stops kissing me to ask,
"Do you want this?" Yes. I really, really, REALLY do.
'YES!' I try even squeak. Nothing comes out. I not fervently and smile slightly.
Now more than ever I REALLY hope Brendon knows what he's doing.
I sure as hell don't.
His hands find the hem of my v-neck and soon it's on the ground. He rubs his hand on my thigh before undoing the button to my jeans.
I don't even realize it until now, those jeans were really constricting me. I am so fucking hard. Something is pressed up against me, and I look down--
I guess Brendon is too.
Slowly, he unzips them and pulls them off, before I unzip his jacket. They join the pile of discarded clothes on the ground. He slips off his polo shirt and jeans.
We're down to just a thin layer of breezy cotton separating us.
This is really happening.
I don't know why, but I hesitate. "Bren?"
"Yeah?" he says, confused look on his face. "What's the matter? If you want to sto-"
"No, not that. Have, like, have you ever done... this before?" He blushes a little, then looks at me smiling just a little.
"No..." he hesitates
"I'm glad you are my first."
Oh. His first.
As in he's a virgin too.
This is getting even better.
That's fucking great.
He kisses me, this time a little more lustfully as he sucks my lip in-between his. The kiss is all tongue and teeth bumping but we're too caught up in the ecstasy of the moment to even remotely care. Brendon kisses my Adam's apple and then looks at me.
"Are you ready?"
"Yeah," I breathe. Sure as hell. I love him, he loves me.
It's plain and simple. Or so I thought.
"Top or bottom," he says. I don't know. Who does what? I'm not too up-to-date with my sex-ed, considering all I knew up until now is that it supposedly felt really good. REALLY good.
Oh, and that when a boy and girl had sex, that's how babies were made.
I didn't think about that. Um.
"Top or bottom," he repeats, grinning mockingly at me as I lay there, utterly confused. He's laughing, that motherfucker!
"Whatever you want, babe," I say smirking. By this point, I am horny as fuck.
Fuck.
Brendon loops his fingers around the elastic on his boxers and just like the rest of his clothes, they now lay on the ground. He looks really hot naked.
I feel myself get even harder, if that's possible. He kisses me, ridding of the final layer of clothes left between us. His bare skin touches mine, and heat is coiling in my stomach. I've never felt this way towards anyone. Ever.
He shifts us to where I'm on top of him, and he is on his back below me, looking stunning as always with his full lips, deep brown eyes, and swooping dark bangs. He leans in and kisses me.
"Bren? C-can you like, tell me what to do? So I don't screw this up?" He looks at me and smiles genuinely.
"Of course," he says. "Prep or..?"
"Do you want it?" He nods. "Then yes." He takes two of my fingers, middle and index, into his mouth. Once he removes them, I lean over him. I can't watch this part. I kiss his neck as I push the first finger in. Soon after comes the second, probably trembling slightly because oh my God, I am so fucking nervous.
Brendon is holding back a pained moan. I can tell. "Just, just move them around. I'm fine. Ry, just don't worry." I follow his orders and after wiggling them around a bit, Brendon lets out another moan.
This time, it isn't because it hurts. "Oh God, Ry. Oh--FUCK!" He says as I brush it again. "I'm ready." He says looking at me, and I nod. I remove my fingers and wipe them on my thin, scratchy sheets. I know what I'm supposed to do now. I take a gulp, squeeze my eyes shut, and let out a ragged breath as I line up with his entrance.
Breathe in.
I push the tip in, and he gasps a little bit.
Breathe out.
Holding onto his hips, I push in the rest of the way.
Breathe in.
He wraps his legs around my hips, pulling us even closer together.
Breathe out.
I give him a moment to get comfortable while I calm myself down.
Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in--
"Ryan?" Brendon looks up, worried. "Are you... are you scared?"
"N-no, I'm fine. I just don't want to mess this up. It's our first time, and... yeah." I bite my lip and then look at him.
"Okay, you ready?" He nods. 1, 2, 3...
I slowly pull back and push in again, building up a slow, steady rhythm. Brendon seems to get comfortable, because he seems to be enjoying it. Me, on the other hand, well...
I feel amazing. Fantastic, blissful, just about all of these in one.
Good was NOT even big enough a word to describe how this felt. Brendon is so fucking tight, and oh my God. The sounds he makes are hot. They don't help. Brendon moans and then looks at me, face scrunched up in concentration and pleasure.
"I'm close," he says, voice raw.
"Me, yeah.. Me- too." I don't think I can last much longer. Brendon has his head buried into the crook of my neck, and all of a sudden he freezes up and digs his nails into my back.
"Fuck!" he yells a stream of obscenities as he comes, all over our stomachs. His muscles tightened around me, and oh God.
That pretty much did it for me.
"Bren, I- I'm gonna--" and I don't even finish the word before I come. White flashes in my eyes and my toes curl and shit, does this feel good. I pull out after a second, and we lay here, on my old twin bed, arms and legs woven together. We're both panting, and there's a sheen of sweat on my forehead.
He's tracing shapes into my hip with his thumb and my head it on his shoulder. We're naked, but everything below the hips is covered in my comforter. I breathe him in, sweet and intoxicating, and before I can think, it's slipping out. What I wanted to tell him for a while now.
"I love you, Bren." He looks at me. His eyes are twinkling, maybe from tears building up or from happiness, I can't tell.
"I love you too, Ry."
-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-
A/N: WOW THAT TOOK FOREVER TO WRITE Dx
But I hope it does the boys justice, I mean c'mon,
they both just lost their v-cards...