hello
one more day (hopefully) till i am free, and i can go out. but there's only 3 more days left of vacation. so basically my whole break has consisted of sitting at home.playing guitar.and computer games.not talking to anyone. grrrr, life is so boring for me right now. but happy new years. my new years resolution was to not get grounded any more...and it already failed, before it was even new years. wow. anyways, i think there is something wrong with me. i can't get to sleep any more. every single night i lay in bed, but cannot fall asleep. so i get up, and walk around my house, and then go turn on the t.v.... but i don't like watching t.v. because it gives me a headache. so i'll go back to bed, turn on music, and i will finally fall asleep around 5 a.m.. and then i wake up at approximately 2:30 the next day (or the same day...whatever) then i wind up with a headache all day, and i lay around doing absolutely nothing. exciting, huh?
anyways...so last night i get home, and our huge christmas tree was knocked over. i didn't even notice it at first, until my sister started screaming. i thought someone had broken into the house or something. so i walk into the room, and there was the christmas tree laying on the ground, and ornaments shattered alllllll over the ground. what a nice way to come home to your house on new years. so we spent the rest of the night cleaning everything up. it was great fun, i tell you.
the idea of me not going away to college for my first years has become redundant in my parents' heads. so now i have no hope to do well. i told them that i am moving out no matter what the fuck they say. i will be an adult. i'll get a full- time job, and i can live on my own. with my dear best friend, allison taylor, that is. but now i'm scared. i know what i want to do, but it is so hard for me to focus. focus on getting good grades, and that the time for me to go to college is getting closer and closer. it feels like time is running out, and that there's nothing thta i can do. ahhhh. i want to be smart.
i miss everyone!! i want to hang out, be part of the group again, and do fun stuff....grrrr. hopefully soon. i have no cd's to listen to, i accidentally left my cd case in ali's car. oh, no. justin was supposed to ive me the cd he made for me..way back when. and he never did. but he will in the very near future..or else.
i love you all.
xoxo
anyways...so last night i get home, and our huge christmas tree was knocked over. i didn't even notice it at first, until my sister started screaming. i thought someone had broken into the house or something. so i walk into the room, and there was the christmas tree laying on the ground, and ornaments shattered alllllll over the ground. what a nice way to come home to your house on new years. so we spent the rest of the night cleaning everything up. it was great fun, i tell you.
the idea of me not going away to college for my first years has become redundant in my parents' heads. so now i have no hope to do well. i told them that i am moving out no matter what the fuck they say. i will be an adult. i'll get a full- time job, and i can live on my own. with my dear best friend, allison taylor, that is. but now i'm scared. i know what i want to do, but it is so hard for me to focus. focus on getting good grades, and that the time for me to go to college is getting closer and closer. it feels like time is running out, and that there's nothing thta i can do. ahhhh. i want to be smart.
i miss everyone!! i want to hang out, be part of the group again, and do fun stuff....grrrr. hopefully soon. i have no cd's to listen to, i accidentally left my cd case in ali's car. oh, no. justin was supposed to ive me the cd he made for me..way back when. and he never did. but he will in the very near future..or else.
i love you all.
xoxo