Bekkah
ok so this whole weekend i hung out with bekkah. umm..on friday after school i went over bekkah's house and we watched movies. um but yea i already posted about the movies. and then on saturday me and her went to the mall. i didnt buy anything but bekkah bought three bras at body basics. omg and we were gonna get manicures but we decided to get ice creams instead. omg while we were waiting in the line at J.B. Scoops this weirdo old guy came over to me and said YOU LOOK REALLY GOOD! IF I WAS TAKING PICTURES I WOULD TAKE URS! TO HELL I WOULD! and me and bekkah exchanged weirdo glances and i just said THANK YOU to be weirdly polite. but uhh....then we went back home and we walked around town. but omg this person was following us right? ok. so we were walking down the street and we saw a car back into a driveway and he was staring at us walk. so then we passed the car and he started moving again SLOWLY. so then he went down the street we were just about to go down and we were mad scared but we went down it anyway to get to her house. so we went down and we saw the car slowly comin back up and he was starin again and we were MAD FREAKED by then. so then we walked back to bekkahs house MAD scared and she was liek OMG KELSEY THAT IS HIM AGAIN! and she said she thought she saw him across the street from her house so we liek RAN into the house and locked the door. haha omg then we watched Wild n Out AGAIN (but i love it..haha...shes teaching im learnin my ruler is burnin...hahahaa) and we danced to RENT songs and took wicked funny pics. and then we had subs and tami drove me home. haha it was mad fun. but then today i went to rehearsal..and yea..NO ONE was there! but i sang my songs and me and renee worked on some scenes. OMG Brian wants renee the same height as me for the parts (im 5'5" and renee is 5'0") so she has to put 5 inches on her! so hes liek WE ARE GETTING U SOME 8 INCH HEELS I KNOW A PLACE IN THE CITY I HAVE TO CALL THEM TOMORROW! haha omg poor renee if i were her i be liek HELL NO IM WEARIN NORMAL SHOES. haha. but yea. then we came home and i walked around with the cat and saw this HUGE mosquito and freaked and ran inside fast. then i did my homework from like..6 or 7 to now. no me gusta tarea. =[. and i have to do the fucking lab tomorrow night cuz its due tuesday. ew. oh well. school...life...it sucks. haha. nono life doesnt suck. just sometimes. but yea... lately ok..physcological part of my journal now. lately i feel really weird like....im never gonna be able to pursue a career that makes me really happy. like i want nothing more than to go to new york and be on broadway and MAKE it as a working actor. but its so damn hard. i mean..i have to MOVE to new york SOON im thinking since im already a sophomore. but i feel like i cant move like...i told my mom that maybe wen i graduate i want to either move to new york to live or to go to school and shes liek NO U CANT LEAVE ME I WILL BE SO LONELY! but .. ok..i either make my mom happy or i fulfull my dream. i mean..if i stay in this town forever ill always wonder what i could have done if i went to new york and tried pursuing my dream! and ill never be happy. idk im so confused career-wise lately. our guidance counselors are all liek U SHOULD HAVE ALL UR YEARS PLANNED OUT! WHAT COLLEGE ARE U GOING TO WHAT CAREER ARE U GOING TO HAVE? and i dont know any of that. i mean..i want to make good money doing what i love. but in order to do what i love i have to work shit jobs until .. actually..if i even do....get an acting gig. and im not sure..but i dont think broadway actors even make that much.idk. but i dont wanna be in deep shit with debt and money always worrying about where the next dollar is gonna come from like my mom does. i mean..i want to get OUT of the projects. my mom has lived here almost her whole life and i think she deserves better! i think I deserve better too! i mean..i dont wanna be stuck in this hellhole for my whole life! idk...thinkin about this is making me depressed..and confused. idk.