Round Seven: Let The Nightmare Begin!!!
Today...
Well, I woke up, to a rather unexpected surprise. Is it a good surprise? Is it a bad surprise? At this point, I am really not sure. Confusion is running at an all time HIGH today. It has been two hours, since I came down the hallway, and first went into shock. I kept expecting the shock to eventually wear off. I kept thinking that, with each new minute that passed, I would somehow come to find a sense of calmness, over what this morning has brought.
Calmness has not yet come.
Another aunt has entered into the picture. This time, the aunt is on my father's side. She looks just like him. And, try as I may, I look at her, and I just cannot get past that. Sure, she is nice (albeit, very TALKATIVE!), but it has been at least 18 years, since I have seen her. It is like being introduced to a stranger.
And, to make it all the more odd...
My mother, apparently not having learned a lesson, has just agreed to let this aunt move in with us.
All I want to do, is stand up, and shout out: "WHAT THE HELL!!!"
I mean, really? Shouldn't I have a part to play in this decision? I mean, I also pay the bills around here.
The aunt was here, for half an hour, before popping out the question. "Can I move in?"
My mom...Without even allowing a SINGLE second for thought. "Sure!"
(I swear, I just want to pull my mother aside, and ask her what the hell she was thinking.)
This morning just DOES NOT make one single bit of sense.
Even my weirdest dreams seem more logical, than the start to this day.
All I can say...I really hope that I can come to get used to this. I hope this shock wears off, though I am not entirely sure it will.
And, I cannot help but think: When did my home become a FRIGGIN compound?
Is this just another weird-ass dream, I am having? Hold on...Let me pinch myself, really hard.
OUCH!!!
Shit. Nope. Not a dream! This weirdness is REAL!!!
I feel like I am on some strange-as-all-hell family edition, of Jerry Springer, or something.
Well...I could really just ramble on about this, for hours on end. But, it is just stressing me out, even more, as I keep on going.
So...
Moving on.
Yesterday. School work.
Well. The written assignment just took FOR-FRIGGIN-EVER to complete. The discussion responses were quick work. But, the written assignment just seemed to go on, and on...AND ON!!! I quickly came to realize that I would not make it to the library, yesterday. Oh well. There is always today. The library won't be open. But, Fed-Ex Kinkos is.
All I can say, about the written assignment. As much as I love writing, I was ready to be done! When I finished, I shut down the computer, breathed a sigh of relief, stretched my hands, and bid the keyboard adieu, for the day.
Nap time.
After my nap, I grabbed my blue loom, and did a little bit of work, on the second sock. And, the yarn was just being a big pain. It was fraying, left and right. And, it was fuzzing up, horribly. Acrylic fuzz. Boy, doesn't that sound like the perfect name, for some funky band?
One hour. That is how long I worked, on the sock. Then, I could do no more. I had simply had enough. Everything about the whole sock making experience, was driving me MAD! I could no longer stand the blue loom. I hated looking at it. I hated the bulky feel of it. HATE! HATE! HATE!!! The knitting pick, was actually hurting my fingers. (This morning, I woke up with a nasty callous, on my index finger. Be warned, boys and girls...Extended loom knitting can cause deformation.)
I will be so happy, when I get to knitting. That is all I can say!
I know it will sound completely stupid. But, whatever. Loom knitting is making me feel downright silly. The bulky plastic looms seem more like some weird TOY, than a tool, that a serious yarnie should use. Crochet hooks. Well, I can say that these have a sophisticated feel, to me. I feel like a SERIOUS yarnie, when I work with a hook. I imagine that knitting will be much the same. But, using a loom...a bulky plastic loom, created in bright colors. Well...they just seem childish. I know it sounds strange, but there it is.
After my hour, of loom knitting hell, I made my way outside, to walk around.
Good news, to report here.
For whatever reason, I decided to experiment with a cane. My uncle had left one here. I grabbed it, and decided to see how things went.
I TOTALLY KICKED ASS! I was walking with one cane. I felt perfectly balanced, as I was walking. This is HUGE news, people! I am sure that I will still be using the walker for while. But, slowly, I am going to start transitioning, to using a normal cane. I felt so accomplished, as I realized that I can walk, with ONE SINGLE CANE! When I tried before, I would notice pain in my back. I was not holding myself correctly. Yesterday, there was no pain. I felt fine. I felt AWESOME!!!
After about 70 feet of one cane walking (fall free, and feeling good), I decided that it was time to start calling the family, to report the good news. First, my sister. My brother. My sister-in-law.
And then, I came across Aunt B's number. For whatever reason, I just can't bring myself to delete it from my phone. And, as I saw her number, I felt the sting of tears. This was something that Aunt B. would have LOVED to hear. She was always so supportive, of my learning to walk.
I put the phone down. I wiped away the tears that were starting to form. And, I said: "Well...I did it. Did you see me, Betty? I am walking with one cane." And, I knew she heard me. I knew she saw it. I could feel her support, just the same as I did, when she was still physically here.
God! I miss her, so much!
Ok...moving on. (If I don't, I will start bawling, in front of the computer.)
After a bit more walking, I took a bath.
Then, another row, on the birthday blanket. And, as I worked this row, I realized just how low, my black and orange yarn have become. I am so close to being done. I just hope that I have enough black and orange yarn, to finish this project. I really do not want to have to buy more, to just work a small portion. Unfortunately, I think I may have to. We will just have to wait, and see.
After working the row, I had a dinner (which was actually breakfast. Fried eggs, and a bagel.)
Then, it was TV time, for a bit. Nothing on, was any good at all. But, I still watched.
Then, I was off to my room. I grabbed the beginning, of the Medallion Circular Throw. (Let me ask you...Measuring in, at 62" in diameter, can this project still be called a throw? I mean, that is full out BIG AFGHAN size. When I think of a throw, I think of a smaller scale. I don't know...Maybe I am wrong.) It was time to work round 7.
And, I am not sure what happened. Maybe it is just me. Maybe it was, in part, because I was FRIGGIN tired as anything. Or, maybe the pattern is just not as descriptive as it could be. But, whatever the reason, round 7 confused the crap out of me. And, it started to stress me out.
But, I refused to curse. I REFUSED to go to the dark, bad place. I have to think happy, and work with love, on this. I took a deep breath, and started.
And, I think I did it right. I am still not entirely sure. Time will tell.
After working this round, I went to sleep.
Today...
Well, I will probably start my day with a meditation. I am still bugging, about the unexpected new roommate.
I will go out, to send off my assignment. Then, to JoAnn's (hopefully), and then...Sock time, birthday blanket time, and Medallion Circular Throw time.
Well, that is it, for today.
Until tomorrow...
Happy looming, and crocheting.
Well, I woke up, to a rather unexpected surprise. Is it a good surprise? Is it a bad surprise? At this point, I am really not sure. Confusion is running at an all time HIGH today. It has been two hours, since I came down the hallway, and first went into shock. I kept expecting the shock to eventually wear off. I kept thinking that, with each new minute that passed, I would somehow come to find a sense of calmness, over what this morning has brought.
Calmness has not yet come.
Another aunt has entered into the picture. This time, the aunt is on my father's side. She looks just like him. And, try as I may, I look at her, and I just cannot get past that. Sure, she is nice (albeit, very TALKATIVE!), but it has been at least 18 years, since I have seen her. It is like being introduced to a stranger.
And, to make it all the more odd...
My mother, apparently not having learned a lesson, has just agreed to let this aunt move in with us.
All I want to do, is stand up, and shout out: "WHAT THE HELL!!!"
I mean, really? Shouldn't I have a part to play in this decision? I mean, I also pay the bills around here.
The aunt was here, for half an hour, before popping out the question. "Can I move in?"
My mom...Without even allowing a SINGLE second for thought. "Sure!"
(I swear, I just want to pull my mother aside, and ask her what the hell she was thinking.)
This morning just DOES NOT make one single bit of sense.
Even my weirdest dreams seem more logical, than the start to this day.
All I can say...I really hope that I can come to get used to this. I hope this shock wears off, though I am not entirely sure it will.
And, I cannot help but think: When did my home become a FRIGGIN compound?
Is this just another weird-ass dream, I am having? Hold on...Let me pinch myself, really hard.
OUCH!!!
Shit. Nope. Not a dream! This weirdness is REAL!!!
I feel like I am on some strange-as-all-hell family edition, of Jerry Springer, or something.
Well...I could really just ramble on about this, for hours on end. But, it is just stressing me out, even more, as I keep on going.
So...
Moving on.
Yesterday. School work.
Well. The written assignment just took FOR-FRIGGIN-EVER to complete. The discussion responses were quick work. But, the written assignment just seemed to go on, and on...AND ON!!! I quickly came to realize that I would not make it to the library, yesterday. Oh well. There is always today. The library won't be open. But, Fed-Ex Kinkos is.
All I can say, about the written assignment. As much as I love writing, I was ready to be done! When I finished, I shut down the computer, breathed a sigh of relief, stretched my hands, and bid the keyboard adieu, for the day.
Nap time.
After my nap, I grabbed my blue loom, and did a little bit of work, on the second sock. And, the yarn was just being a big pain. It was fraying, left and right. And, it was fuzzing up, horribly. Acrylic fuzz. Boy, doesn't that sound like the perfect name, for some funky band?
One hour. That is how long I worked, on the sock. Then, I could do no more. I had simply had enough. Everything about the whole sock making experience, was driving me MAD! I could no longer stand the blue loom. I hated looking at it. I hated the bulky feel of it. HATE! HATE! HATE!!! The knitting pick, was actually hurting my fingers. (This morning, I woke up with a nasty callous, on my index finger. Be warned, boys and girls...Extended loom knitting can cause deformation.)
I will be so happy, when I get to knitting. That is all I can say!
I know it will sound completely stupid. But, whatever. Loom knitting is making me feel downright silly. The bulky plastic looms seem more like some weird TOY, than a tool, that a serious yarnie should use. Crochet hooks. Well, I can say that these have a sophisticated feel, to me. I feel like a SERIOUS yarnie, when I work with a hook. I imagine that knitting will be much the same. But, using a loom...a bulky plastic loom, created in bright colors. Well...they just seem childish. I know it sounds strange, but there it is.
After my hour, of loom knitting hell, I made my way outside, to walk around.
Good news, to report here.
For whatever reason, I decided to experiment with a cane. My uncle had left one here. I grabbed it, and decided to see how things went.
I TOTALLY KICKED ASS! I was walking with one cane. I felt perfectly balanced, as I was walking. This is HUGE news, people! I am sure that I will still be using the walker for while. But, slowly, I am going to start transitioning, to using a normal cane. I felt so accomplished, as I realized that I can walk, with ONE SINGLE CANE! When I tried before, I would notice pain in my back. I was not holding myself correctly. Yesterday, there was no pain. I felt fine. I felt AWESOME!!!
After about 70 feet of one cane walking (fall free, and feeling good), I decided that it was time to start calling the family, to report the good news. First, my sister. My brother. My sister-in-law.
And then, I came across Aunt B's number. For whatever reason, I just can't bring myself to delete it from my phone. And, as I saw her number, I felt the sting of tears. This was something that Aunt B. would have LOVED to hear. She was always so supportive, of my learning to walk.
I put the phone down. I wiped away the tears that were starting to form. And, I said: "Well...I did it. Did you see me, Betty? I am walking with one cane." And, I knew she heard me. I knew she saw it. I could feel her support, just the same as I did, when she was still physically here.
God! I miss her, so much!
Ok...moving on. (If I don't, I will start bawling, in front of the computer.)
After a bit more walking, I took a bath.
Then, another row, on the birthday blanket. And, as I worked this row, I realized just how low, my black and orange yarn have become. I am so close to being done. I just hope that I have enough black and orange yarn, to finish this project. I really do not want to have to buy more, to just work a small portion. Unfortunately, I think I may have to. We will just have to wait, and see.
After working the row, I had a dinner (which was actually breakfast. Fried eggs, and a bagel.)
Then, it was TV time, for a bit. Nothing on, was any good at all. But, I still watched.
Then, I was off to my room. I grabbed the beginning, of the Medallion Circular Throw. (Let me ask you...Measuring in, at 62" in diameter, can this project still be called a throw? I mean, that is full out BIG AFGHAN size. When I think of a throw, I think of a smaller scale. I don't know...Maybe I am wrong.) It was time to work round 7.
And, I am not sure what happened. Maybe it is just me. Maybe it was, in part, because I was FRIGGIN tired as anything. Or, maybe the pattern is just not as descriptive as it could be. But, whatever the reason, round 7 confused the crap out of me. And, it started to stress me out.
But, I refused to curse. I REFUSED to go to the dark, bad place. I have to think happy, and work with love, on this. I took a deep breath, and started.
And, I think I did it right. I am still not entirely sure. Time will tell.
After working this round, I went to sleep.
Today...
Well, I will probably start my day with a meditation. I am still bugging, about the unexpected new roommate.
I will go out, to send off my assignment. Then, to JoAnn's (hopefully), and then...Sock time, birthday blanket time, and Medallion Circular Throw time.
Well, that is it, for today.
Until tomorrow...
Happy looming, and crocheting.