Give me a reason that I can believe in...
...and I will believe in you.
Soooo...look who has neglected their livejournal for a few months.
Sophomore year is going well, for the most part. Classes are classy, and I've been learning some new shit and meeting some new homies and whatnot. I'm still quite happy here, and I'm still sure that I'm where I'm supposed to be. Last week, however, I kind of hit rock bottom. Not only was there the whole breaking up thing, I got this horrible cold and ended up sleeping for like 16 hours in one day, then the next day I thought I bounced back from it, and then guess what..."ohhh i'm going to get back together with my ex girlfriend and not even mention it to you, but instead let you find out from facebook! Suprise! Happy Wednesday!!!". Haha. Go me. So then I clearly didn't sleep much that night, and woke up the next morning and was doing the whole puking repeatedly thing, so then I told myself that I was just upset and it was psychological. But an hour later, I decided that probably wasn't the case, so I wandered over to the health center with the lovely Jamie Pinkham '09 in tow, and oh guess what...Heather had a urinary tract infection. Just what I needed.
So a few hours later, I'm lying in my bed in the fetal position crying my eyes out, and I knew then that I had pretty much hit rock bottom and things really could only get better from there. So I took a mental/physical health day, and by Saturday I was on the mend, which was good, because Daddy came to visit me. It was really nice seeing him. He bought me new clothes and ate about 24oz. of steak. Oh, Dad. I love my dad. I really do. I know sometimes I act like I don't, but I love my dad and I'm even starting to like Sara, so things are looking up on that front. My urinary tract has recovered and my cold is gone.
As for my heart...it's doing okay. I'm not gonna lie, it still kind of hurts a little bit. I'm trying to act normal and not let it get me down. I hate being so replaceable and feeling used/led on/played. I need to stop letting my guard down though, because it never ends well for me, but I don't want to live my life that way. As my brother told me the other day, I tend to be a little too trusting, and that needs to stop I think. But we're doing the friends thing and I think we'll be okay. And if you for some strange reason happen to stumble over this...oh well. I don't hate you.
Going home tomorrow. Can't wait to see the boy. I can't really say baby anymore, because he really isn't much of a baby now. He's fucking adorable though. It will be nice to see Grandpa as well and hopefully get over to the beach. Maybe I'll try to do something with Jordan Sunday night. I love her, she's a good friend to me. I love all of my friends and I miss everyone from home, and I'm going to miss Nikki and Melanie a lot.
In conclusion...
Yeah.
Soooo...look who has neglected their livejournal for a few months.
Sophomore year is going well, for the most part. Classes are classy, and I've been learning some new shit and meeting some new homies and whatnot. I'm still quite happy here, and I'm still sure that I'm where I'm supposed to be. Last week, however, I kind of hit rock bottom. Not only was there the whole breaking up thing, I got this horrible cold and ended up sleeping for like 16 hours in one day, then the next day I thought I bounced back from it, and then guess what..."ohhh i'm going to get back together with my ex girlfriend and not even mention it to you, but instead let you find out from facebook! Suprise! Happy Wednesday!!!". Haha. Go me. So then I clearly didn't sleep much that night, and woke up the next morning and was doing the whole puking repeatedly thing, so then I told myself that I was just upset and it was psychological. But an hour later, I decided that probably wasn't the case, so I wandered over to the health center with the lovely Jamie Pinkham '09 in tow, and oh guess what...Heather had a urinary tract infection. Just what I needed.
So a few hours later, I'm lying in my bed in the fetal position crying my eyes out, and I knew then that I had pretty much hit rock bottom and things really could only get better from there. So I took a mental/physical health day, and by Saturday I was on the mend, which was good, because Daddy came to visit me. It was really nice seeing him. He bought me new clothes and ate about 24oz. of steak. Oh, Dad. I love my dad. I really do. I know sometimes I act like I don't, but I love my dad and I'm even starting to like Sara, so things are looking up on that front. My urinary tract has recovered and my cold is gone.
As for my heart...it's doing okay. I'm not gonna lie, it still kind of hurts a little bit. I'm trying to act normal and not let it get me down. I hate being so replaceable and feeling used/led on/played. I need to stop letting my guard down though, because it never ends well for me, but I don't want to live my life that way. As my brother told me the other day, I tend to be a little too trusting, and that needs to stop I think. But we're doing the friends thing and I think we'll be okay. And if you for some strange reason happen to stumble over this...oh well. I don't hate you.
Going home tomorrow. Can't wait to see the boy. I can't really say baby anymore, because he really isn't much of a baby now. He's fucking adorable though. It will be nice to see Grandpa as well and hopefully get over to the beach. Maybe I'll try to do something with Jordan Sunday night. I love her, she's a good friend to me. I love all of my friends and I miss everyone from home, and I'm going to miss Nikki and Melanie a lot.
In conclusion...
Yeah.