what i want...
god...why do i do the things i do?? i dream of things, want things and when i can have them i dont take them. i know i shouldnt dwell on this but god, my oppurtunity was RIGHT THERE, like...god!! and then ofcourse i regretted it all night. i mean, i had fun (laughed ALOT) but i definetly missed something that i really wanted. i am sooo stupid. i am such a girl. i want what i passed up. i know i should move on but i've been waiting for this oppurtunity. why couldnt i just be the fucking 4th wheel???? i feel like someone needed to hit me in the head and be like this is it. i hate myself for this.
sometimes, i beleive that your decisions make up who you are and maybe that was a decision about who i was. some of the things ali said made me think twice, and maybe thats why i didnt go...i cant be that type of girl.
i just wanted a cut boy to keep me warm, all i wanted was for us to be walking back and for him give me his coat..but i think that might be asking a little too much from a kid that i barely know...i think that might just be what i want in general and he seems to be my obsession right now...i dont know what i want anymore....
...i think im just a lil overemotional right now so take this with a grain of salt...
sometimes, i beleive that your decisions make up who you are and maybe that was a decision about who i was. some of the things ali said made me think twice, and maybe thats why i didnt go...i cant be that type of girl.
i just wanted a cut boy to keep me warm, all i wanted was for us to be walking back and for him give me his coat..but i think that might be asking a little too much from a kid that i barely know...i think that might just be what i want in general and he seems to be my obsession right now...i dont know what i want anymore....
...i think im just a lil overemotional right now so take this with a grain of salt...