Maybe
It's the morning of my last day. My last day of life as I know it. I have already written something on the subject in my "real" journal, and I would post it here, but it is mostly incoherent ranting and I know most of you fuckers wouldn't read the entire thing or understand it.
Time's almost up, think of everything we've accomplished! I have systematically destroyed almost every friendship I've had in the past few months, whether it be from drugs, girls or just plain off being an ass. I can't remember most of what I have done, and I'm not sorry. I have not changed, for good nor worse, YOU changed. To that, I have something to say, I think.
I am experiencing so many different emotions all at once right now, from anger, jealousy, terror, happiness, numbness, confusion to exhaustion. I don't think I was really in love, I think I was just begging god for a reason to come back, and he didn't give me one. Jacob is the only person worth seeing anymore, since I severed my last ties to Moon and Tiff last night. I said something, I know I did, but I don't remember what it was. All I remember was walking down Tiff's street and getting picked up by Cody. That's not how it was suppose to happen, but I know why it did. Not the details, but the general picture.
"I'm sorry" is not the response anyone should get to the words "I love you", no matter how drunk you are. I have never been more dissapointed in my life, or angry, or jealous.
In a little over ten months, everything I liked about them will be gone anyway. There will no longer be two distinguishable people, a ying and a yang, one for me to love and one to hate. They will be one, and I shall dissapear as I always do.
This is it, ground zero. Why don't you all say a few words to mark the occasion?
I'm. . .fucking terrified. I'm angry about how this has to end.
Here we are
Same old fears
Wish you were here
Time's almost up, think of everything we've accomplished! I have systematically destroyed almost every friendship I've had in the past few months, whether it be from drugs, girls or just plain off being an ass. I can't remember most of what I have done, and I'm not sorry. I have not changed, for good nor worse, YOU changed. To that, I have something to say, I think.
I am experiencing so many different emotions all at once right now, from anger, jealousy, terror, happiness, numbness, confusion to exhaustion. I don't think I was really in love, I think I was just begging god for a reason to come back, and he didn't give me one. Jacob is the only person worth seeing anymore, since I severed my last ties to Moon and Tiff last night. I said something, I know I did, but I don't remember what it was. All I remember was walking down Tiff's street and getting picked up by Cody. That's not how it was suppose to happen, but I know why it did. Not the details, but the general picture.
"I'm sorry" is not the response anyone should get to the words "I love you", no matter how drunk you are. I have never been more dissapointed in my life, or angry, or jealous.
In a little over ten months, everything I liked about them will be gone anyway. There will no longer be two distinguishable people, a ying and a yang, one for me to love and one to hate. They will be one, and I shall dissapear as I always do.
This is it, ground zero. Why don't you all say a few words to mark the occasion?
I'm. . .fucking terrified. I'm angry about how this has to end.
Here we are
Same old fears
Wish you were here