machine created music [NARRATIVE]
Who: Soundwave | Starscream, Megatron, & Sari Sumdac [godmodded with permission]
What: Over the course of the journey, he defragments.
Where: Wherever they went, he goes. He observes. He collects data.
When: Somewhere, over the course of time.
Warnings: N/A
Notes: ...machine saw everything it had made and said, behold.
At first, he hears them. Distantly, muffled. As if his audial receptors were damaged and every bit of sound was covered in cloth, muddling the crispness of noise. Robbing him of his last enjoyment.
His other senses are all he really has left, and even as a tapedeck, it's hard to visualize where things all. Touch is all that is left, as he feels the warm hands of the little techno-organic holding him, sitting him on her lap. When she speaks, he cannot understand. He does not know why he abruptly cannot understand.
To begin with, he is in the way. Simply because it is true; he does not come out of his shell as they land somewhere. In a way, he can sense their work. First, Sari sets him down, and joins the others.
They work. To mend the damage left behind by a touch he does not know. It has a flavor he is familiar with unmaking and there are other. Things. He isn't quite so sure about.
When they are done, a pair of claws gingerly pick him up. Words cannot be defined, but he recognizes the screeches as Starscream.
No response. The Air Commander is silent, and gently places him back into the hands of Sari.
-=-=-
YOU WILL KNOW ME FIRST.
It's harsh and angry, the memories of this one. The anger of being forced into an organic body. The growing emotions that he could not swallow and wished he could delete. The enhanced senses of being utterly alone. No cassettes to fill the tray, no familiar hum of their young sparks. To grow close to humans was unspeakable, but done. To actually feel love he did not quite understand.
Those senses are also dull.
Pain in the end with an explosion, the fury in knowing he was parted with all that he had left. That the promise he intended to keep could not be done, because the promised did not know him.
And there is music.
I'll give you a solo.
A sense of determination and utter ego; the latter is so unfamiliar to him that he almost wonders if Starscream is in his processor sometimes. No, this one is stubborn and full of himself, but also filled with that sense of loneliness again. A planet gone and destroyed, with only a brother to cooperate with.
The beat of his world hums inside of his processor.
Hey dude, hang in there.
The utter opposite of everything that he is. Emotions, wild and rampant; thoughtless, impulsive actions. No secrets, no cares in the world. Although there is sorrow, there is also a great warmth with this one. Soundwave feels shame for leaning on it so much, to rely on the ember that embraces him instead of rejecting him. He has every reason to hate this one, but instead he's welcomed.
There's love and laughter, to sing with the rhythm of this one's universe.
-=-=-
Words are clearer. There is still a hum behind all sound, as if there's a white noise distracting him. But it is functional.
Sari finds out, when she hums and he tones along with her. Mechanical, but perfectly with harmony.
She is elated, and Soundwave does not comprehend why.
Still, he remains in his tapedeck form. The team splits up briefly; Starscream is with Megatron, and he is left with Sari. Even if he wished to harm the girl, he has no strength for it now. Sari can easily overpower him.
And he finds he has no reason to hurt her.
Tucked into a bag but peeking out from inside, he studies Sari as she approaches a violet, glass statue. It looks like a fountain, frozen.
It's this again.
"You weren't around for it before, so I guess you might not get why we're doing this," Sari explains, as she touches the glass lightly. "But awhile ago, someone named Isis showed up."
Soundwave listens.
"She... I guess she thought she could make everything better. But all she did was make everything in her image. It's like... well, it's kind of hard to explain if you weren't there." Sari frowns.
No. He supposes he understands. Visually, the glass is perhaps remarkable, but there is no. Music to it, nothing about it is very pleasant or has point.
-=-=-
When Sari finishes fixing the fountain, he remembers a recording. A piece of music. He does not know who the memory belongs to, but he plays it.
When she grins, Soundwave finally realizes they have something in common.
He isn't sure how he feels about it.
-=-=-
DO NOT TRUST THE TECHNO-ORGANIC.
Bitterness. It's faint, but there. The anger at being treated as nothing but a tool and a toy, determining that they deserved something better. Soundwave cannot say if that judgment is misplaced or not. He quickly is discovering that he has mixed feelings concerning Sari, and this one certainly does not help in that determining factor. True, he considers himself superior to many creatures, but it is simply true.
That has not changed. But as he lets the memories flit through his processor, he supposes that the methods were not... done well. Soundwave's actions, or this one's. Intentions, understandable. Actions...
The score is mostly destructive. There is little creative or inspiring about it.
QUERY: WHY TURN YOUR BACK ON A SUITABLE LEADER?
Why indeed. Soundwave has only seen an inactive Megatron, one in which he does not know. For reasons he does not understand, many of the other Decepticons respect him. What is it that he has missed that they approve of? It is not as if he is dumb to loyalty; Soundwave has always been a willing servant to his own Megatron. Why should he accept this one?
However, why refuse any Megatron? His own was no more capable; he perished because of Starscream and Unicron's meddling. Because he was weak. This one is simply more... subtle?
The mechanical hum is a comforting sound.
-=-=-
It became a comfort to him to listen to Sari, and grow used to every sound about her. Her programming, her heart beat, her voice. Even being held by her was something he grew used to.
Time passes too quickly. To a new world; here, they parted again, and Soundwave finds himself silently left with Megatron.
Pitifully, he finds himself missing Sari; her company is something he's accepted. This, he acknowledges. Megatron's presence -- at least this one's -- is not something he recognizes or knows what to do with. It's now that Soundwave realizes with all of his irritations with Megatron that he simply does not know what to expect of him.
It's either a mark of a great leader, or an absolutely horrid one.
Megatron has not moved, peering down at Soundwave's small tapedeck form.
"I am not carrying you," the leader of the Decepticons informs him, his voice cold and calm as ever.
Soundwave does not respond.
There is a faint glow to Megatron's optics. "You will bear your own weight, Soundwave. Transform."
...Transform? He hasn't done so for weeks. It's been quieter to be this way, he knows, but it's been. Safer, to be carried around by a child. As if he's protected from the spectres filling his processor.
This time, Megatron's tone becomes a growl, "Are you afraid? Pitiful. You have become so accustomed to being an entertainment device for humans. I have witnessed you being prideful, Soundwave. It remains to be seen if you are a worthy soldier, but I have seen you determined."
The words slowly sink in. Had that been him? Which Soundwave had been that mech? Which one is he?
But he is afraid. And that is disgusting.
"I command you to transform, Soundwave!"
There's something completely thrilling at being ordered to do something again. It's a sense of familiarity that he clings to mentally, and he accepts.
Fear. Yes, there is fear, but fear is not something that should make him curl up and desperately seek shelter. Soundwave is not certain he can conquer himself, but he will accept the order.
And begin confrontation.
With great strain and a static-filled groan, Soundwave finds himself transforming, slamming his feet onto the ground and stumbling.
"AS YOU COMMAND."
Megatron looks at him, satisfied.
-=-=-
I REMEMBER WHAT HE IS CAPABLE OF.
More memories of humanity, but this one is different. There is calculation, enjoyment. Indulgence, even; Soundwave is not certain he has ever relaxed enough to be able to indulge in anything. This one had, it seems. But it also planned, it was going to betray Starscream. An understandable motivation.
However, in the end, Starscream had come back for him. Had saved him. An action that has confused this one's memory ever since.
Perhaps. It was time to accept his help. That is the broadcast he downloads.
-=-=-
"So it's you and me today," Starscream says a bit stiffly.
Soundwave says nothing.
"Right, well. We'd better get started."
Still there is silence.
The pair travel quietly, which is unusual to think of when concerning the Air Commander. Yet, he too says nothing; the only noise are the clangs that ensue with every step that they take, unnoticed ironically by the locals.
An hour goes by. Starscream is focused on an item that is out of place, or so he says. The sensation of it ... does bother Soundwave in a way he cannot describe. To him, it's more as if something is missing. Like there is an absence of something. A Nothingness.
As he watches Starscream work, he speaks at last. "QUERY."
Starscream stops and glances to him. "What?" he answers, his tone indicating that he's forcing himself to be patient.
"HOW DID STARSCREAM RECOGNIZE HIS OWN IDENTITY AFTER THE LABYRINTH?"
There's a pause as Starscream considers.
"Several things. It isn't simple, I still have memories I shouldn't." Starscream scowls. "However, one thing helps. Recognizing a unique memory that is my own."
Something... unique? Soundwave emits a mechanical click, indicating he does not understand.
"Give it some thought, will you? Get creative or something."
-=-=-
Remember.
He remembers...
Something his own? Something that is not shared with others in his processor. It's hard, because something links all of them. Absolutely all of them. What is one that Soundwave has for himself?
He remembers. Edward Elric, picking him up and carrying him to a preferred location. And again, when the boy tried to stop him from getting to the Heart.
And a third, as they reunited in the Labyrinth.
That. Is Soundwave's memory. One he can call his own. It is somehow important.
-=-=-
As he passes by Starscream the following day, Soundwave pauses long enough to salute him.
He doesn't wait to hear what the Air Commander has to say as he leaves.
-=-=-
When it's time to finally return to Nautilus... he cannot say that he is fixed. He cannot say that he is healed. But Soundwave is confident enough that he can function, at least.
Function, and know his own identity.
His own metronome to tune out other sounds.
What: Over the course of the journey, he defragments.
Where: Wherever they went, he goes. He observes. He collects data.
When: Somewhere, over the course of time.
Warnings: N/A
Notes: ...machine saw everything it had made and said, behold.
At first, he hears them. Distantly, muffled. As if his audial receptors were damaged and every bit of sound was covered in cloth, muddling the crispness of noise. Robbing him of his last enjoyment.
His other senses are all he really has left, and even as a tapedeck, it's hard to visualize where things all. Touch is all that is left, as he feels the warm hands of the little techno-organic holding him, sitting him on her lap. When she speaks, he cannot understand. He does not know why he abruptly cannot understand.
To begin with, he is in the way. Simply because it is true; he does not come out of his shell as they land somewhere. In a way, he can sense their work. First, Sari sets him down, and joins the others.
They work. To mend the damage left behind by a touch he does not know. It has a flavor he is familiar with unmaking and there are other. Things. He isn't quite so sure about.
When they are done, a pair of claws gingerly pick him up. Words cannot be defined, but he recognizes the screeches as Starscream.
No response. The Air Commander is silent, and gently places him back into the hands of Sari.
-=-=-
YOU WILL KNOW ME FIRST.
It's harsh and angry, the memories of this one. The anger of being forced into an organic body. The growing emotions that he could not swallow and wished he could delete. The enhanced senses of being utterly alone. No cassettes to fill the tray, no familiar hum of their young sparks. To grow close to humans was unspeakable, but done. To actually feel love he did not quite understand.
Those senses are also dull.
Pain in the end with an explosion, the fury in knowing he was parted with all that he had left. That the promise he intended to keep could not be done, because the promised did not know him.
And there is music.
I'll give you a solo.
A sense of determination and utter ego; the latter is so unfamiliar to him that he almost wonders if Starscream is in his processor sometimes. No, this one is stubborn and full of himself, but also filled with that sense of loneliness again. A planet gone and destroyed, with only a brother to cooperate with.
The beat of his world hums inside of his processor.
Hey dude, hang in there.
The utter opposite of everything that he is. Emotions, wild and rampant; thoughtless, impulsive actions. No secrets, no cares in the world. Although there is sorrow, there is also a great warmth with this one. Soundwave feels shame for leaning on it so much, to rely on the ember that embraces him instead of rejecting him. He has every reason to hate this one, but instead he's welcomed.
There's love and laughter, to sing with the rhythm of this one's universe.
-=-=-
Words are clearer. There is still a hum behind all sound, as if there's a white noise distracting him. But it is functional.
Sari finds out, when she hums and he tones along with her. Mechanical, but perfectly with harmony.
She is elated, and Soundwave does not comprehend why.
Still, he remains in his tapedeck form. The team splits up briefly; Starscream is with Megatron, and he is left with Sari. Even if he wished to harm the girl, he has no strength for it now. Sari can easily overpower him.
And he finds he has no reason to hurt her.
Tucked into a bag but peeking out from inside, he studies Sari as she approaches a violet, glass statue. It looks like a fountain, frozen.
It's this again.
"You weren't around for it before, so I guess you might not get why we're doing this," Sari explains, as she touches the glass lightly. "But awhile ago, someone named Isis showed up."
Soundwave listens.
"She... I guess she thought she could make everything better. But all she did was make everything in her image. It's like... well, it's kind of hard to explain if you weren't there." Sari frowns.
No. He supposes he understands. Visually, the glass is perhaps remarkable, but there is no. Music to it, nothing about it is very pleasant or has point.
-=-=-
When Sari finishes fixing the fountain, he remembers a recording. A piece of music. He does not know who the memory belongs to, but he plays it.
When she grins, Soundwave finally realizes they have something in common.
He isn't sure how he feels about it.
-=-=-
DO NOT TRUST THE TECHNO-ORGANIC.
Bitterness. It's faint, but there. The anger at being treated as nothing but a tool and a toy, determining that they deserved something better. Soundwave cannot say if that judgment is misplaced or not. He quickly is discovering that he has mixed feelings concerning Sari, and this one certainly does not help in that determining factor. True, he considers himself superior to many creatures, but it is simply true.
That has not changed. But as he lets the memories flit through his processor, he supposes that the methods were not... done well. Soundwave's actions, or this one's. Intentions, understandable. Actions...
The score is mostly destructive. There is little creative or inspiring about it.
QUERY: WHY TURN YOUR BACK ON A SUITABLE LEADER?
Why indeed. Soundwave has only seen an inactive Megatron, one in which he does not know. For reasons he does not understand, many of the other Decepticons respect him. What is it that he has missed that they approve of? It is not as if he is dumb to loyalty; Soundwave has always been a willing servant to his own Megatron. Why should he accept this one?
However, why refuse any Megatron? His own was no more capable; he perished because of Starscream and Unicron's meddling. Because he was weak. This one is simply more... subtle?
The mechanical hum is a comforting sound.
-=-=-
It became a comfort to him to listen to Sari, and grow used to every sound about her. Her programming, her heart beat, her voice. Even being held by her was something he grew used to.
Time passes too quickly. To a new world; here, they parted again, and Soundwave finds himself silently left with Megatron.
Pitifully, he finds himself missing Sari; her company is something he's accepted. This, he acknowledges. Megatron's presence -- at least this one's -- is not something he recognizes or knows what to do with. It's now that Soundwave realizes with all of his irritations with Megatron that he simply does not know what to expect of him.
It's either a mark of a great leader, or an absolutely horrid one.
Megatron has not moved, peering down at Soundwave's small tapedeck form.
"I am not carrying you," the leader of the Decepticons informs him, his voice cold and calm as ever.
Soundwave does not respond.
There is a faint glow to Megatron's optics. "You will bear your own weight, Soundwave. Transform."
...Transform? He hasn't done so for weeks. It's been quieter to be this way, he knows, but it's been. Safer, to be carried around by a child. As if he's protected from the spectres filling his processor.
This time, Megatron's tone becomes a growl, "Are you afraid? Pitiful. You have become so accustomed to being an entertainment device for humans. I have witnessed you being prideful, Soundwave. It remains to be seen if you are a worthy soldier, but I have seen you determined."
The words slowly sink in. Had that been him? Which Soundwave had been that mech? Which one is he?
But he is afraid. And that is disgusting.
"I command you to transform, Soundwave!"
There's something completely thrilling at being ordered to do something again. It's a sense of familiarity that he clings to mentally, and he accepts.
Fear. Yes, there is fear, but fear is not something that should make him curl up and desperately seek shelter. Soundwave is not certain he can conquer himself, but he will accept the order.
And begin confrontation.
With great strain and a static-filled groan, Soundwave finds himself transforming, slamming his feet onto the ground and stumbling.
"AS YOU COMMAND."
Megatron looks at him, satisfied.
-=-=-
I REMEMBER WHAT HE IS CAPABLE OF.
More memories of humanity, but this one is different. There is calculation, enjoyment. Indulgence, even; Soundwave is not certain he has ever relaxed enough to be able to indulge in anything. This one had, it seems. But it also planned, it was going to betray Starscream. An understandable motivation.
However, in the end, Starscream had come back for him. Had saved him. An action that has confused this one's memory ever since.
Perhaps. It was time to accept his help. That is the broadcast he downloads.
-=-=-
"So it's you and me today," Starscream says a bit stiffly.
Soundwave says nothing.
"Right, well. We'd better get started."
Still there is silence.
The pair travel quietly, which is unusual to think of when concerning the Air Commander. Yet, he too says nothing; the only noise are the clangs that ensue with every step that they take, unnoticed ironically by the locals.
An hour goes by. Starscream is focused on an item that is out of place, or so he says. The sensation of it ... does bother Soundwave in a way he cannot describe. To him, it's more as if something is missing. Like there is an absence of something. A Nothingness.
As he watches Starscream work, he speaks at last. "QUERY."
Starscream stops and glances to him. "What?" he answers, his tone indicating that he's forcing himself to be patient.
"HOW DID STARSCREAM RECOGNIZE HIS OWN IDENTITY AFTER THE LABYRINTH?"
There's a pause as Starscream considers.
"Several things. It isn't simple, I still have memories I shouldn't." Starscream scowls. "However, one thing helps. Recognizing a unique memory that is my own."
Something... unique? Soundwave emits a mechanical click, indicating he does not understand.
"Give it some thought, will you? Get creative or something."
-=-=-
Remember.
He remembers...
Something his own? Something that is not shared with others in his processor. It's hard, because something links all of them. Absolutely all of them. What is one that Soundwave has for himself?
He remembers. Edward Elric, picking him up and carrying him to a preferred location. And again, when the boy tried to stop him from getting to the Heart.
And a third, as they reunited in the Labyrinth.
That. Is Soundwave's memory. One he can call his own. It is somehow important.
-=-=-
As he passes by Starscream the following day, Soundwave pauses long enough to salute him.
He doesn't wait to hear what the Air Commander has to say as he leaves.
-=-=-
When it's time to finally return to Nautilus... he cannot say that he is fixed. He cannot say that he is healed. But Soundwave is confident enough that he can function, at least.
Function, and know his own identity.
His own metronome to tune out other sounds.