Change your heart, Change your mind.
Characters:Mik trick_mikkie Alex frost_flame and Adam again.
Setting: The U and Adams Loft
Rating: R?
Summary: Mik tells the truth, Adam stops by and Alex is a hypocrite. (Or so she tells Mik)
Mik hasn’t seen Alex in a few days, there is a missing part to this… a few sentences before this is just Mik holding onto Alex and comforting her as Avery went off to do whatever she needed to do. Alex moves wrong and rubs that bruise that Adam left on her in Miks standalone… I hope you guys are in for the long ride.
TheMoonChildSai: *curls up more slightly doesn't understand why but feels uneasy... almost guily... but in the wirl of emotions doesn'treally examine it*
Elegant Silence: I'm sorry....
TheMoonChildSai: I... Il... i'll be alright... i just needsome time
Elegant Silence: O..okay. And just... sorry for other things too.
TheMoonChildSai: t...tell me?
TheMoonChildSai: i... doubt i can be... much more upset than... i am...
Elegant Silence: *Almost laughs outloud* I... I can't add to that. It has to wait.
TheMoonChildSai: wh..whats so bad?
Elegant Silence: *Loosens her grip on Alex for a minute. Siting back and straightens the large hoodie shes practically drowned in and slowly pulls the zipper down.* [The bruise IS visible]
TheMoonChildSai: you... who... who hurt you?
Elegant Silence: I... He... didn't hurt me... *Looks down, pulling the hoodie back around her tightly*
TheMoonChildSai: h..how? *feels something akin to suspicion siring and feels slightly nauseous*
Elegant Silence: He's... he... He slipped when I told him I was pregnant. *shaking*
TheMoonChildSai: wh...who?
Elegant Silence : His name... is Adam. *Takes deep breaths* He's... he's the babys father.
TheMoonChildSai: b...but... you.. *swallows pushing away from Mik* you... that’s new
Elegant Silence: *Pulls her knees up to her chest.* I'm sorry. *Doesn't say more, won't make excuses*
TheMoonChildSai: *eyes widen slightly shaking her head trying to deny it*
Elegant Silence: He... he... he knows about you. He knows how much I love you... he he was only just paying me... I...
TheMoonChildSai: *pulls away from mik compltly stumbling back* wh... why....
Elegant Silence: I'm sorry! I don't... I don't know what else to tell you!
TheMoonChildSai: I... You. You lied... You said you stopped... why... why did you ke...keep going... All... all uyou said ... about the... the monye... we... we don't need you... to...to that...
Elegant Silence: I did stop! It was... just Adam... and only twice after... after... *rubs a hand over her stomach* after we made her...
TheMoonChildSai: Wh...why?
Elegant Silence: *Looks down* I... I don't know.
TheMoonChildSai: *looks away stuned and not sure*...did...d i ... make you wai too long?
Elegant Silence: *Miks head snaps up to look straight at Alex* What? You... wait... no! It's not that.
TheMoonChildSai: *looking down shaking her head... was fate trying to make her kill herself. Isaac's words had been taken back but she couldn't forget the look on his face as he said thm. She had though Kurts death would finish her off but kitty had talked her back. Now this...*
Elegant Silence: I don't know why... Alex I love you... that will never go away... he... he... I think he loves me. *shakin harder now, has no idea what to say*
TheMoonChildSai: *one hand lhtly sqquezes her left arm. At this closenes Mik can see the new roghly done patch job of nearly a dozen long thin rips in te fabric*
\
Elegant Silence : Alex... *reaches out to touch her*
TheMoonChildSai: *tightens her grip slowly til the pain was nearly making her eyes water.*Why now?
TheMoonChildSai: '*proably ot directed at Mik*
Elegant Silence: *Reaches again for Alexs hand* Alex don't...
TheMoonChildSai: why... I... Isaac... Iaac wasn'... was right... was...wasn't here? You... You.,.. you all.. friggin... wi...wish ... i'd just fuckin... die... so... so i'd stop.. stop making... you... all deal with me. *she was crying again. betrayal and grief and other emotions mixing in her voice*
TheMoonChildSai: *Isaacs words coming back to haunt her*
Elegant Silence: *Feels her chest tighten* God no! Alex... I don't.. I don't want you to die.
TheMoonChildSai: *shakeing hre head crying harder* all... all my... my fault...
Elegant Silence: No no no no! Alex you didn't... this... this wasn't you.. It was me.. I'm... I'm sorry.
TheMoonChildSai: Why then god damit... WHY! I trusted you! I never asked where yolu'd been or with who... I never even shouted at you... when you told me what. You’d done... I... I just kept ... kept on... fucking... believing you ... you loved mot... to fucking much... to hurt me.. you... you always said... said you'd ne..nver hurt me...
Elegant Silence: *Flinches back. She knew this would come.* I used that trust and I hate myself for it! I never meant to hurt you! I didn't... I went back the second time because he said he'd give me money, he liked me so he'd give me money without anything in return... We actually talked.. he he's someone older than me and we talked and It... it happened... I should've made him stop... I'm sorry...
TheMoonChildSai: You never meant to fucking hurt me? FUCK THAT. Did you think... even... for a fucking moment... that ... fucking some guy... some guy while i'm looking foreword to the next friggen time i'd get to.. to see you wouldn't hurt me?
Elegant Silence: I KNOW okay?! You yell at me as if I don't realize these things! I fucked up. Bad... worse than any other time... and I don't expect you to forgive me... but what Alex, would you have wanted me not to tell you!? Because I wasn't... It was Adam who told me to tell you.
TheMoonChildSai: so... so you tell me cause you boyfriend made you is that it? *the hurt in her voice became even more clear* Whatever happened to fucking honesty? to fucking telling each other everything? *Anger and betrayal and hurt mixing to make her... very upset. She had thought mik had finally just decided to tell her. the fact she wasn't doing it by choice making the whole conversation that much worse*
Elegant Silence: He's not my fucking boyfriend! I don't love him! I didn't want to tell you because I love you... I went to end it with him.. everything and then... then he said he wanted you to know about him. I was thinking about telling you but It would've been easier if he didn't want you to know him.
TheMoonChildSai (3:04:26 PM): then... WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO KNOW THAT BASTARD!
Elegant Silence: He wants to know why I cried after every time we fucked or why I wouldn't let him kiss me... or why there were new scars on my body....
TheMoonChildSai:*stops... looking down goes silent her rage not stopped but simply paused bottled. Hateing it almost now but Mik in need meaning more to her than her anger no matter how much she wanted to hate mik now she couldn't*
Elegant Silence: I know how angry you must be... and I... I expect nothing less... I love you Alex.... truly and compleatly... you know that, deep down you know that... I hate myself... I hate me... I can't expalin my action and I have no right to make any excuses...
TheMoonChildSai: *still looking down* ju...just... promise me... you... you won't lie to me... anymore...
Elegant Silence: I won't... ever... again. This time... I mean it. *Wants to reach out to hold Alex, but doesn't know if that's okay. As shes debating whether or not to make a move she hears a voice yelling in The U.* CRISS!?
TheMoonChildSai: *doesn't look up.* I.. I hope you do... Mik...I'll be honest with you... I wasn't "cutting" when i ripped up my glove. If Isaac had run any slower after me i would be dead. If kitty hdn't tbeen the way i found out about Kurt *swallows the greif still there* I would be dead. If you lie to me again Mik... You've kept me alive so long... If i can't trust you who can i trust... if i can't trus anyone... whats the pint of staying?
Elegant Silence: I... I will never hurt you...agian. *hopes her words sounds as true as she believes them. She looks up when she hears the yelling.* Oh god...
TheMoonChildSai (3:19:18 PM): what...?
Elegant Silence: Criss. Seriously... I know you're in here. People are staring. *Mik stands suddenly. Looks almost afraid. Looks over at Alex* Its... it's Adam...
TheMoonChildSai: criss? Isee we have boy names in common then. *despite teh dry joke there was no humor in her voce*
Elegant Silence: The name I used on the street... *Mik says by way of explination. She moves a little until she can see the tall boy close by.* A... Adam... I'm.. here... *Shes shaking again. Doesn't know how Alex will react*
TheMoonChildSai: *stands next to her looking down at herself. She was dressed in a corset and black jeans that would have fit her better if e weighed a bit more. the small removed part of her mind dryly thanked Avery for making her clean up. She looked half decent at least and at lest without the hoodie she wasn’t' easily mistaken for a ten year old*
Elegant Silence: *Adam comes into full view. He is at least a foot taller than Mik. He doesn't seemed fazed atall at the two girls staring at him.* Mikkie. *He nods to Alex* You must be the girlfriend. I well, I'm sorry for any hurt I may have put you through inadvertently.
TheMoonChildSai: *raises an eyebrow at him. Close up he can see the scars the pepper her body and steely blue eyes.* hello... *even a greeting sounds cold, maybe remidning Mik of frost*
Elegant Silence: *Adam looks like he wants to make a comment. Instead he walks to stand closely infront of Mik.* I came to get my hoodie. *He whispers.* *Mik seems to tense up but when he doesn't touch her she slumps a little. She reaches up and unzips the jacket.*
TheMoonChildSai: what did you say?
Elegant Silence: *Both Mik and Adam look over.* Alex he... *Adam cuts her off.* I just came to get my jacket Alex. I apoligise.
TheMoonChildSai: Eponine... to you... i'm Eponine... *glares at the use of her name.*
Elegant Silence: *Mik looks at the floor and Adam stands up a bit straighter* I apoligise then Eponine. I lent Mikkie my jacket and I just want it back.
TheMoonChildSai: Pretty much only the Montys and people in the U are alowed to call her Alex. Most others either don't know er names Alex or know better You have it then why don't you take your leave of our home you so rudely barged into. *smiles thinly* Would you like me to show you the door or do you think you might find it yourself
Elegant Silence : *Mik looks up wideeyed.* Alex... you... *Adam puts his hand on Miks now exposed shoulder and absently rubs his thumb over her collar bone.* Worry not Criss. I can see why she's upset. I'll take my leave. *He leans into her body and whispers into her ear.* I'll be waiting. *Alex can see Mik shiver.* *Adam stand up staright again.* I know you hate me Miss Eponine, but you will see me again... she is carrying my child. *He turns and walks away*
TheMoonChildSai: *sighs to mik* I'll be back soon. *fallows him. stoopingafter a few steps looking back* don't worry. I won't kill him unless you want me to.
Elegant Silence: *Mik looks ready to follow aswell but doesn't.* I'd.. rather you not... kill him...
TheMoonChildSai: *pauses then smiles* mind telling me here he lives? The conversation i want to have with him would be easer if i didn't have o fallow him. *there was a slightly flinty look in her eyes*
Elegant Silence: I... um... 3 blocks south and 2 blocks east... The Alcraft Lofts... Hes on the top floor... Number... number 339... Alex don't.. hurt him... He really can be nice...
TheMoonChildSai: i won't hurt him... If I do have to see him again and deal with him as he said that wold most likely complicate things. *turns away uttering more to herself than MIk* Putting the fear of god into him however is likely to simplify matters
Elegant Silence: *Mik stares at the floor, leaning against the nearest wall.. Whispers.* He's not like the rest Alex... he won't be to easy to scare...
///
Elegant Silence: *Adam took the short way back to his home. Throwing the hoodie onto the couch and goes straight to the kitchen.*
TheMoonChildSai: *a voice from the living room* hm.... nice place
Elegant Silence : *Adam leans his head out of the kitchen door to look out. He looks mildly startled then raises an eyebrow* Had to follow me Miss Eponine? Make yourself at home.
TheMoonChildSai: *shes not in plain sight* I belive you'll recal the door locks itself. So i did not fallow you home good sir.
Elegant Silence: So why have you come to grace me with your undoubtly wonderful presence.
TheMoonChildSai: *somone taps his shoulder* oh... just to get a few things worked out between us good sir.
Elegant Silence: *Adam stands up straight and look twards the girl* Fine by me. Would you like something to drink?
TheMoonChildSai: no thanks. *smiles pleasantly* nice of you to ask though.
Elegant Silence: I have to keep my guests happy.
TheMoonChildSai: *sits down on the couch*so... your intrested in your kid
Elegant Silence: *Adam leans against the doorframe* I am. Who wouldn't be. That kid is half of me.
TheMoonChildSai: so does this caring go far enough to give money towards the care and keeping of the kid. As you can probably guess we don't have much to spare even now, *standing up, she was almost sickly she was so thin and she knew it showed.*
Elegant Silence: I was giving Criss money everytime she came here. She told me about your wedding and how she wanted to make it beautiful for you. And we slept together only 3 times... so when I say "everytime" it's not as if it was a constant thing. I'm not a bastard Eponine... I would support your child any way I could.
TheMoonChildSai: *blinks lightly* How much about me has she told you?
Elegant Silence:Well, you're Alex... but aparently not to me. You plan to get married. She has a best friend Alta... I just know about her life, not yours.
TheMoonChildSai: *stiffens when he uses her name* I'm Eponine to outsiders. My real names Alexandria Epoinine Frost, well at least as real as your probably concerned with. You might say in the opion of the germent i died over a month agi
Elegant Silence: I don't want you to hate me Eponine. Although I'm sure you already do. And as long as you're standing in my livingroom, you are real.
TheMoonChildSai: *turns on a light and sits back down* Hate is like most things a relative term.
Elegant Silence: Either way, I'm sure I'm not your favorite person.
TheMoonChildSai: very true. I'll be honest with you since it seems to be the word of the week. I don't particularly like you right nw. I may not ever like you. But i can be civil if you are. *looks out the window* and heck. eighteen and a half years is a long time to know someone you don't particularly like. I have bigger fish to hate than you, ad hates relly is relative. Perhaps one day will be on a first name basis. *looks back smiling thinly* of course you understand if you o anything... questionable, i know where you live, where you sleep, and by the nd of next week i'll likely know most everything else, i like being thorough. I also have as you probably guess a good ability to get into where i want to get.
Elegant Silence: I have no reason to not be civil to you. I'd rather appreciate if you did call me Adam though. I don't plan to do anything to make you think that you could feel the need to hurt me in anyway.
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles* good. I really don't enjoy brutally mrdering people, it really is diffucult to get out of the carpet.
Elegant Silence: I'd rather not like blood on my white carpet. Not that it would matter if you killed me... *Shrugs*
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs smiling inocently loking at the ceiling akeing her lookalot younger than she apeared when glareing*
Elegant Silence: I'm not sure what else you would like me to say Miss Eponine.
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs* nothing much good sir. I will take my leave of you if you wish. Though i suppose as a gesture of good will i'll allow a question should you have one.
Elegant Silence: I will not impose. Since you got in, I'm sure you know your way out. Tell Criss I meant what I said.
TheMoonChildSai: and may i ask what you said?
Elegant Silence: Nothing important.
TheMoonChildSai: *rasised a eyebrow*
Elegant Silence: Eponine. Listen. I mean not to come off as rude, but Criss and I did do more than fuck. I consider her a friend... since I will no longer impose as a "lover" so to speak.
TheMoonChildSai: I can see that... which is practically why i'm standing here in a strange place with a strange man trying to figure out weather or not a miracle has actually occured or if your just like ever other fucking guy i've ever met outside the U and not at home trying to figure out how the fuck i'm gonna be able to go to my adoptive brothers funeral without being noticed by the... oh i'd say good dozen people who would enjoy nothing more than to murder me with there bare hands.
Elegant Silence: Like all the others? I am just a guy who happened to stumble across Criss one night. *Adam pauses.* Funeral? I'm sorry for your loss.
TheMoonChildSai: Your timings just wonderful you know. I found out my brother died, last night. As for like the others *turns away to leave her hair was cut short enough he could easily see the dozens of scars on her back* Lets just say i meant the world in general.
Elegant Silence: I apologize again. I did not know of all your troubles.
TheMoonChildSai: *turns back to look at him* I don;t know what to make of you good sir. I'll give you this much. Your not like the guys i'm used to dealing with.
Elegant Silence: I'm not like many Miss Epoinine.
TheMoonChildSai: I see why Mik likes you, as a friend at least, you remind me of somone i know. Your a hard nut to crack. *turns to go pauseing at the door* I'll be seeing ya Adam *leaves*
Elegant Silence: *Leans back against the wall where she was standing. He smiles.* Well I can see why she likes you...
///
Elegant Silence:*Mik is still sitting in the same place Alex left her. She'd seen Alta for a bit but she's alone now.*
TheMoonChildSai: *goes over to her sitting down* he's unharmed and strangly i maged to only startled him… I really was looking forward to putting the fear of god into him
Elegant Silence: *Looks up, her face is tear stained.* I knew he'd be a tough one to break. He's not afraid of much...
TheMoonChildSai: *sits down aross from her.* are you okay?
Elegant Silence: Yes? No... I don't know...
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles slightly* I... If it's y consolation i feel a little better... a battle of wits always does a soul good. *looks down* And this whole things helped me clear my head... I... Kurt... woulwant me to go on as best I could...
Elegant Silence: I don't deserve you.
TheMoonChildSai: *sighs* nor... nor do i... *looks down* I... I've been a hypocrite
Elegant Silence: What?
TheMoonChildSai: I... I'm still working at the Dove... *looks down touching her neck absently*
Elegant Silence: Oh.
TheMoonChildSai: Th,,..there were... some prblems... when i tried to quit,..
Elegant Silence: *Shrug* I no longer have the right to ask things of you.
TheMoonChildSai: *blinks then looks down* Mik... your suposed to be upset... I lied to you to... Then i acted like a hypocrite...
Elegant Silence: Doesn't matter. I hurt you.
TheMoonChildSai: *Sighs still looking down*
Elegant Silence: It really doesn't matter... What I did with Adam is... is not excuseable.
TheMoonChildSai : niether iswhat... what i tried to do... and what i would have done if Isaac kitty and Avery hadn't stopped me
Elegant Silence: It's all my fault... If I was here... If I hadn't...
TheMoonChildSai: It would have just been you tryin to figure out weather or not i was bleeding to death
Elegant Silence: *Stares at the floor, shivering at the loss of the the warm hoodie that had been with her for three days.*
TheMoonChildSai: cold?
Elegant Silence: Kinda... I was used to the jacket... Doesn't matter.
TheMoonChildSai: *reaches over to where her hoody lay on the other side of the mattress* here... it's big on me so it should fit
Elegant Silence: You... You don't have... to... I'm okay...
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs* I can just get another one... afterall... i have money right now
Elegant Silence: I... *reaches for the jacket and slips it on.*
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles thinly* better?
Elegant Silence: Yeah... thanks.
TheMoonChildSai: *drops her gaze to the round* are...are w okay?
Elegant Silence: That's... up to you.
TheMoonChildSai: I... I want us to be... cause... If... if... where not... i ... don't know if i'll be...
Elegant Silence: I... I'm not sure I deserve to be forgiven...
TheMoonChildSai: you may not deserve it... but sometimes... we have to realize whats more important... and... I think this is more important than my hurt feelings... If you want shower me with gifts and promises and what not... but mik... I love you... and you've stuck by me through so much... you stayed with me when most would have run for cover... you would have sacrificed yourself for me... I... We've been through to much together to end like this.
Elegant Silence: I don't... know what I'd do with out you... You were the first... the only after...after Alta... and I can't see me without you... I just can't.
TheMoonChildSai: You... You've kept me alive... in more ways than one... I love you MIk...
Elegant Silence: Forever and a day love. I love you.
TheMoonChildSai: past my dieing day...
Elegant Silence: And then some.
TheMoonChildSai: *looks down hugging her knees* I... I'm tired mik
Elegant Silence: *Looks up.* Huh? *Seems like she's kinda out of it.*
TheMoonChildSai: I'm tired...
Elegant Silence: Then sleep love.... I want to sit up and think...
TheMoonChildSai: *shakes her head* i don't want to sleep...
Elegant Silence: Oh. Okay.
TheMoonChildSai: *moves close to mik hoering inside her reach but not ouching her.*
Elegant Silence: *Looks over before practically flinging herself at Alex and wrapping around her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles closing hereyes and relaxing back into Miks embrace*...this... this is where we belong
Elegant Silence : I don't ever want to leave...
TheMoonChildSai: *shivering slightly curling closerfor warmth* Winters coming again soon
Elegant Silence: *Snuggles closer to her* Yeah... we could try to steal some blankets and stuf from Adam....
TheMoonChildSai: or we could ask
Elegant Silence: What fun would that be.
TheMoonChildSai: but it would mean when we really needed somthing i could steal it easier
Elegant Silence: Adam won't let us need things anymore. You saw where he lives... he'll take care of us and we don't need much Alta and Avery and Isaac and the others can share.
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles* yeah...
Elegant Silence: He's not... so bad right? *Her voice is a little timid again*
TheMoonChildSai: not... not the worst guy i've ver met.
Elegant Silence: Well he isn't Isaac, but he's the first guy I've met that didn't rape or TRY to rape me...
TheMoonChildSai: well i've met Kurt and Rick... I supose Xander counts but i think he would rape me if he asn't terified of me.
Elegant Silence: *Laughs out loud then covers her mouth quickly* God...
TheMoonChildSai: what?
Elegant Silence: We talk about rape like it's a fucking everyday thing...
TheMoonChildSai: sadly... i... i can't say i'm used to it... but the last time it happened i was like "Shit... not the fuck again... *mocks crying for ten second* Kittys gona throw a fit."… you... you get jaded
Elegant Silence: It does seem to happen that way... A year ago... I would've never thought that I'd be here...
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs* a year ago almost exactly i made my first attempt at escape. The beating that got me had be out cold more than a day
Elegant Silence: I wasn't supposed to be here... I wouldn't change it though... maybe for what I could help you with but not myself.
TheMoonChildSai: I wouldn't be anywhere but here...
Elegant Silence: Me either. I have you and I have Alta and Avery.. and We have baby Isaac. *She smiles and runs a hand over her stomach.*
TheMoonChildSai: or Jaden
Elegant Silence: I have a feeling it's gonna be a boy... I can just... feel it.
TheMoonChildSai: but i don't understand little boys... I prefer little girls... lord knows i'cve already done a decent jo of raising one
Elegant Silence: Too many girls in this place. I could be wrong... *shrug*
TheMoonChildSai: *her smile fades thoughts turing back to the one boy whos no longer helping to even it out*
Elegant Silence: I'm sorry Alex...
TheMoonChildSai: I... I just ... can't believe he's gone...
Elegant Silence: It's not right.
TheMoonChildSai: *hums a moment then sings* melodies in the air, singing lil just aint fair sometimes i just can't believe your gone
and i'm sure the viw from heaven
beats the hell outa mine here
if we all believe in heaven maybe we'll make it through one more year
down here. *sighs looks down* he used to say he was going to hell, and as ong as he took Ray with him he didn't care.
Elegant Silence: He didn't deserve to die. I know it... but he's away from this now... he doesn't have to deal with this shit... He'll watch over you.
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles* J..just like Peirce... Maybe they'll even meet that way. Peirce woulda liked Kurt.
Elegant Silence: Maybe Bryson is there too... I know he's always with me... and so he has to know Pierce and Kurt.
TheMoonChildSai: *looks up* hey brothers, blood, adopted and soon to be in-laws. I hope all is well up there. Its rather shot to hell down here but... maybe it'll get better.
Elegant Silence: *Looks up as well but doesn't say anything.*
TheMoonChildSai: ...if we al believe in heaven... maybe we can make it through one more year
Elegant Silence: I won't let you go until I absolutely have to…
TheMoonChildSai: and... i'll not let go again...
Elegant Silence : I'll be here to catch you. Always
TheMoonChildSai: …and i you
Elegant Silence (9:49:39 PM): I'm still sorry..
TheMoonChildSai: I'm stull hurt.. but remember... more important things
Elegant Silence: I just... I can't let it go...
TheMoonChildSai: then learn from it...
Elegant Silence: Why don't you hate me.
TheMoonChildSai: ...because if i hated you then i wouldn't love you... If i didn't love you i'd lose the only thing that makes me get up and face the world most days
Elegant Silence: I don't deserve you... and I know...I know I sound like a broken rechord but I just don't understand it
TheMoonChildSai: *curls up in Miks lap*...I... *chuckles bitterly.* good thing... we had this talk... I... I remember why i feel crappy...
Elegant Silence: *Doesn't say anything just hold on tighter to Alex*
TheMoonChildSai: i... skipped my meds today... forgot... or maybe... lingering wants... ever since ... the doc started giving me all those pills to take the withdrawal takes longer to kick in
Elegant Silence: We need to get you to my doctor... she'll... she'll help us.
TheMoonChildSai: I don't wanna get my meds... but i i don't... well... withdrawl will start soon....
Elegant Silence: I'll get them for you if you want…
TheMoonChildSai: *reluctantly breaks away from Mik* there where they always are... just bring the bag. don't bother trying to figure out which bottle i need
Elegant Silence: Alright. *stand reluctantly and makes her way to their bed.*
TheMoonChildSai: *lies down on Averys mattrss staring at the ceiling. The eason she'd brought them up in the first place was because the normal nausia and lightheadeness was starting again. She knew even caught this early the more painful syntoms ere bound to start before the drugs kicked in,*
Elegant Silence: *Mik gets back as quickly as possible. sits down next to Alex and hands over the bag*
TheMoonChildSai: *sits up sorting through the bag puling out three perscription bottles and getting out the pills she needed. her hands were lightly clumsy nausia makeing the room decidedly against staying put*
Elegant Silence : *Puts and arm around the smaller girl* It'll be okay.
TheMoonChildSai: *takes the meds then leans against Mik closing her eyes* and to think only a few hours ago i wanted this...
Elegant Silence: *Holds onto her tightly* You wanted this?
TheMoonChildSai: this pain... not....not eactly cutting but... same effect i uess. *closes her eyes flinching pain flaring up again as the old meds finish pettering out and the new ones havn't kked in yet.*
Elegant Silence: How... how long for them to kick in?
TheMoonChildSai: ...don't know... I... i've gottne better abot taking them... I... I havn't missed them since the *flinches slightly forcing hersel to continue breathing steadily* ... i was a... with sir... and... and i had n..no way o telling time then...
Elegant Silence:*Rubs her back* It'll be okay. I'm here...
TheMoonChildSai: n...no matter.. what happens... we...we always end... likethis...
Elegant Silence: Like... this.
TheMoonChildSai: l...like this... together... in love.. getting through... rough things... shit... toet- *stops talking closing her mouth just trying to keep her bretahing stady her entire body gone rigid*
Elegant Silence: *Holds on tightly still* I don't think this is the greatest time but... but I'm here with you and and I love you...
TheMoonChildSai : *a long moment later she relaxes opening her eyes shyly* a...at least the rooms stopped spinning anyway
Elegant Silence: There you go quoting Rent again. *grins*
TheMoonChildSai: Like this better? *smiles* live in my house... i'll be your shelter.
Elegant Silence : I do like that. Maybe I like using our own words better...
TheMoonChildSai: *closes her eyes and sighs* tomorrow maybe? I'm tired.
Elegant Silence : Then sleep.
TheMoonChildSai : I'll have to get up and walk back to our mattress won't i?
Elegant Silence: No. I can take ya there. *grins* I like to carry you.
TheMoonChildSai: *wraps her arms around Miks neck*
Elegant Silence: *Stands up slowly, bringing Alex up with her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *lets Mik pick her up as usual not protesting anymore* glad you got a compact girlfriend?
Elegant Silence: Easy carry on access. *Grins* I love you.
TheMoonChildSai: Me *yawns* to... And now we're just being mushy
Elegant Silence: It's fun. *sets her down on their own mattress and sits down next to her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *pulls the blankets on and curls up* I'm glad to be back here... when your not here I just can't fall asleep here...
Elegant Silence: I'm glad were'... gonna be okay. I'm glad to be here to hold you.
TheMoonChildSai : *can barely keep her eyes open* m...me to
Elegant Silence: Sleep love. *wraps an arm around her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *closes her eyes and drifts off to sleep a smile on her face*
Elegant Silence: *Stays up and just watches over Alex.*
Setting: The U and Adams Loft
Rating: R?
Summary: Mik tells the truth, Adam stops by and Alex is a hypocrite. (Or so she tells Mik)
Mik hasn’t seen Alex in a few days, there is a missing part to this… a few sentences before this is just Mik holding onto Alex and comforting her as Avery went off to do whatever she needed to do. Alex moves wrong and rubs that bruise that Adam left on her in Miks standalone… I hope you guys are in for the long ride.
TheMoonChildSai: *curls up more slightly doesn't understand why but feels uneasy... almost guily... but in the wirl of emotions doesn'treally examine it*
Elegant Silence: I'm sorry....
TheMoonChildSai: I... Il... i'll be alright... i just needsome time
Elegant Silence: O..okay. And just... sorry for other things too.
TheMoonChildSai: t...tell me?
TheMoonChildSai: i... doubt i can be... much more upset than... i am...
Elegant Silence: *Almost laughs outloud* I... I can't add to that. It has to wait.
TheMoonChildSai: wh..whats so bad?
Elegant Silence: *Loosens her grip on Alex for a minute. Siting back and straightens the large hoodie shes practically drowned in and slowly pulls the zipper down.* [The bruise IS visible]
TheMoonChildSai: you... who... who hurt you?
Elegant Silence: I... He... didn't hurt me... *Looks down, pulling the hoodie back around her tightly*
TheMoonChildSai: h..how? *feels something akin to suspicion siring and feels slightly nauseous*
Elegant Silence: He's... he... He slipped when I told him I was pregnant. *shaking*
TheMoonChildSai: wh...who?
Elegant Silence : His name... is Adam. *Takes deep breaths* He's... he's the babys father.
TheMoonChildSai: b...but... you.. *swallows pushing away from Mik* you... that’s new
Elegant Silence: *Pulls her knees up to her chest.* I'm sorry. *Doesn't say more, won't make excuses*
TheMoonChildSai: *eyes widen slightly shaking her head trying to deny it*
Elegant Silence: He... he... he knows about you. He knows how much I love you... he he was only just paying me... I...
TheMoonChildSai: *pulls away from mik compltly stumbling back* wh... why....
Elegant Silence: I'm sorry! I don't... I don't know what else to tell you!
TheMoonChildSai: I... You. You lied... You said you stopped... why... why did you ke...keep going... All... all uyou said ... about the... the monye... we... we don't need you... to...to that...
Elegant Silence: I did stop! It was... just Adam... and only twice after... after... *rubs a hand over her stomach* after we made her...
TheMoonChildSai: Wh...why?
Elegant Silence: *Looks down* I... I don't know.
TheMoonChildSai: *looks away stuned and not sure*...did...d i ... make you wai too long?
Elegant Silence: *Miks head snaps up to look straight at Alex* What? You... wait... no! It's not that.
TheMoonChildSai: *looking down shaking her head... was fate trying to make her kill herself. Isaac's words had been taken back but she couldn't forget the look on his face as he said thm. She had though Kurts death would finish her off but kitty had talked her back. Now this...*
Elegant Silence: I don't know why... Alex I love you... that will never go away... he... he... I think he loves me. *shakin harder now, has no idea what to say*
TheMoonChildSai: *one hand lhtly sqquezes her left arm. At this closenes Mik can see the new roghly done patch job of nearly a dozen long thin rips in te fabric*
\
Elegant Silence : Alex... *reaches out to touch her*
TheMoonChildSai: *tightens her grip slowly til the pain was nearly making her eyes water.*Why now?
TheMoonChildSai: '*proably ot directed at Mik*
Elegant Silence: *Reaches again for Alexs hand* Alex don't...
TheMoonChildSai: why... I... Isaac... Iaac wasn'... was right... was...wasn't here? You... You.,.. you all.. friggin... wi...wish ... i'd just fuckin... die... so... so i'd stop.. stop making... you... all deal with me. *she was crying again. betrayal and grief and other emotions mixing in her voice*
TheMoonChildSai: *Isaacs words coming back to haunt her*
Elegant Silence: *Feels her chest tighten* God no! Alex... I don't.. I don't want you to die.
TheMoonChildSai: *shakeing hre head crying harder* all... all my... my fault...
Elegant Silence: No no no no! Alex you didn't... this... this wasn't you.. It was me.. I'm... I'm sorry.
TheMoonChildSai: Why then god damit... WHY! I trusted you! I never asked where yolu'd been or with who... I never even shouted at you... when you told me what. You’d done... I... I just kept ... kept on... fucking... believing you ... you loved mot... to fucking much... to hurt me.. you... you always said... said you'd ne..nver hurt me...
Elegant Silence: *Flinches back. She knew this would come.* I used that trust and I hate myself for it! I never meant to hurt you! I didn't... I went back the second time because he said he'd give me money, he liked me so he'd give me money without anything in return... We actually talked.. he he's someone older than me and we talked and It... it happened... I should've made him stop... I'm sorry...
TheMoonChildSai: You never meant to fucking hurt me? FUCK THAT. Did you think... even... for a fucking moment... that ... fucking some guy... some guy while i'm looking foreword to the next friggen time i'd get to.. to see you wouldn't hurt me?
Elegant Silence: I KNOW okay?! You yell at me as if I don't realize these things! I fucked up. Bad... worse than any other time... and I don't expect you to forgive me... but what Alex, would you have wanted me not to tell you!? Because I wasn't... It was Adam who told me to tell you.
TheMoonChildSai: so... so you tell me cause you boyfriend made you is that it? *the hurt in her voice became even more clear* Whatever happened to fucking honesty? to fucking telling each other everything? *Anger and betrayal and hurt mixing to make her... very upset. She had thought mik had finally just decided to tell her. the fact she wasn't doing it by choice making the whole conversation that much worse*
Elegant Silence: He's not my fucking boyfriend! I don't love him! I didn't want to tell you because I love you... I went to end it with him.. everything and then... then he said he wanted you to know about him. I was thinking about telling you but It would've been easier if he didn't want you to know him.
TheMoonChildSai (3:04:26 PM): then... WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO KNOW THAT BASTARD!
Elegant Silence: He wants to know why I cried after every time we fucked or why I wouldn't let him kiss me... or why there were new scars on my body....
TheMoonChildSai:*stops... looking down goes silent her rage not stopped but simply paused bottled. Hateing it almost now but Mik in need meaning more to her than her anger no matter how much she wanted to hate mik now she couldn't*
Elegant Silence: I know how angry you must be... and I... I expect nothing less... I love you Alex.... truly and compleatly... you know that, deep down you know that... I hate myself... I hate me... I can't expalin my action and I have no right to make any excuses...
TheMoonChildSai: *still looking down* ju...just... promise me... you... you won't lie to me... anymore...
Elegant Silence: I won't... ever... again. This time... I mean it. *Wants to reach out to hold Alex, but doesn't know if that's okay. As shes debating whether or not to make a move she hears a voice yelling in The U.* CRISS!?
TheMoonChildSai: *doesn't look up.* I.. I hope you do... Mik...I'll be honest with you... I wasn't "cutting" when i ripped up my glove. If Isaac had run any slower after me i would be dead. If kitty hdn't tbeen the way i found out about Kurt *swallows the greif still there* I would be dead. If you lie to me again Mik... You've kept me alive so long... If i can't trust you who can i trust... if i can't trus anyone... whats the pint of staying?
Elegant Silence: I... I will never hurt you...agian. *hopes her words sounds as true as she believes them. She looks up when she hears the yelling.* Oh god...
TheMoonChildSai (3:19:18 PM): what...?
Elegant Silence: Criss. Seriously... I know you're in here. People are staring. *Mik stands suddenly. Looks almost afraid. Looks over at Alex* Its... it's Adam...
TheMoonChildSai: criss? Isee we have boy names in common then. *despite teh dry joke there was no humor in her voce*
Elegant Silence: The name I used on the street... *Mik says by way of explination. She moves a little until she can see the tall boy close by.* A... Adam... I'm.. here... *Shes shaking again. Doesn't know how Alex will react*
TheMoonChildSai: *stands next to her looking down at herself. She was dressed in a corset and black jeans that would have fit her better if e weighed a bit more. the small removed part of her mind dryly thanked Avery for making her clean up. She looked half decent at least and at lest without the hoodie she wasn’t' easily mistaken for a ten year old*
Elegant Silence: *Adam comes into full view. He is at least a foot taller than Mik. He doesn't seemed fazed atall at the two girls staring at him.* Mikkie. *He nods to Alex* You must be the girlfriend. I well, I'm sorry for any hurt I may have put you through inadvertently.
TheMoonChildSai: *raises an eyebrow at him. Close up he can see the scars the pepper her body and steely blue eyes.* hello... *even a greeting sounds cold, maybe remidning Mik of frost*
Elegant Silence: *Adam looks like he wants to make a comment. Instead he walks to stand closely infront of Mik.* I came to get my hoodie. *He whispers.* *Mik seems to tense up but when he doesn't touch her she slumps a little. She reaches up and unzips the jacket.*
TheMoonChildSai: what did you say?
Elegant Silence: *Both Mik and Adam look over.* Alex he... *Adam cuts her off.* I just came to get my jacket Alex. I apoligise.
TheMoonChildSai: Eponine... to you... i'm Eponine... *glares at the use of her name.*
Elegant Silence: *Mik looks at the floor and Adam stands up a bit straighter* I apoligise then Eponine. I lent Mikkie my jacket and I just want it back.
TheMoonChildSai: Pretty much only the Montys and people in the U are alowed to call her Alex. Most others either don't know er names Alex or know better You have it then why don't you take your leave of our home you so rudely barged into. *smiles thinly* Would you like me to show you the door or do you think you might find it yourself
Elegant Silence : *Mik looks up wideeyed.* Alex... you... *Adam puts his hand on Miks now exposed shoulder and absently rubs his thumb over her collar bone.* Worry not Criss. I can see why she's upset. I'll take my leave. *He leans into her body and whispers into her ear.* I'll be waiting. *Alex can see Mik shiver.* *Adam stand up staright again.* I know you hate me Miss Eponine, but you will see me again... she is carrying my child. *He turns and walks away*
TheMoonChildSai: *sighs to mik* I'll be back soon. *fallows him. stoopingafter a few steps looking back* don't worry. I won't kill him unless you want me to.
Elegant Silence: *Mik looks ready to follow aswell but doesn't.* I'd.. rather you not... kill him...
TheMoonChildSai: *pauses then smiles* mind telling me here he lives? The conversation i want to have with him would be easer if i didn't have o fallow him. *there was a slightly flinty look in her eyes*
Elegant Silence: I... um... 3 blocks south and 2 blocks east... The Alcraft Lofts... Hes on the top floor... Number... number 339... Alex don't.. hurt him... He really can be nice...
TheMoonChildSai: i won't hurt him... If I do have to see him again and deal with him as he said that wold most likely complicate things. *turns away uttering more to herself than MIk* Putting the fear of god into him however is likely to simplify matters
Elegant Silence: *Mik stares at the floor, leaning against the nearest wall.. Whispers.* He's not like the rest Alex... he won't be to easy to scare...
///
Elegant Silence: *Adam took the short way back to his home. Throwing the hoodie onto the couch and goes straight to the kitchen.*
TheMoonChildSai: *a voice from the living room* hm.... nice place
Elegant Silence : *Adam leans his head out of the kitchen door to look out. He looks mildly startled then raises an eyebrow* Had to follow me Miss Eponine? Make yourself at home.
TheMoonChildSai: *shes not in plain sight* I belive you'll recal the door locks itself. So i did not fallow you home good sir.
Elegant Silence: So why have you come to grace me with your undoubtly wonderful presence.
TheMoonChildSai: *somone taps his shoulder* oh... just to get a few things worked out between us good sir.
Elegant Silence: *Adam stands up straight and look twards the girl* Fine by me. Would you like something to drink?
TheMoonChildSai: no thanks. *smiles pleasantly* nice of you to ask though.
Elegant Silence: I have to keep my guests happy.
TheMoonChildSai: *sits down on the couch*so... your intrested in your kid
Elegant Silence: *Adam leans against the doorframe* I am. Who wouldn't be. That kid is half of me.
TheMoonChildSai: so does this caring go far enough to give money towards the care and keeping of the kid. As you can probably guess we don't have much to spare even now, *standing up, she was almost sickly she was so thin and she knew it showed.*
Elegant Silence: I was giving Criss money everytime she came here. She told me about your wedding and how she wanted to make it beautiful for you. And we slept together only 3 times... so when I say "everytime" it's not as if it was a constant thing. I'm not a bastard Eponine... I would support your child any way I could.
TheMoonChildSai: *blinks lightly* How much about me has she told you?
Elegant Silence:Well, you're Alex... but aparently not to me. You plan to get married. She has a best friend Alta... I just know about her life, not yours.
TheMoonChildSai: *stiffens when he uses her name* I'm Eponine to outsiders. My real names Alexandria Epoinine Frost, well at least as real as your probably concerned with. You might say in the opion of the germent i died over a month agi
Elegant Silence: I don't want you to hate me Eponine. Although I'm sure you already do. And as long as you're standing in my livingroom, you are real.
TheMoonChildSai: *turns on a light and sits back down* Hate is like most things a relative term.
Elegant Silence: Either way, I'm sure I'm not your favorite person.
TheMoonChildSai: very true. I'll be honest with you since it seems to be the word of the week. I don't particularly like you right nw. I may not ever like you. But i can be civil if you are. *looks out the window* and heck. eighteen and a half years is a long time to know someone you don't particularly like. I have bigger fish to hate than you, ad hates relly is relative. Perhaps one day will be on a first name basis. *looks back smiling thinly* of course you understand if you o anything... questionable, i know where you live, where you sleep, and by the nd of next week i'll likely know most everything else, i like being thorough. I also have as you probably guess a good ability to get into where i want to get.
Elegant Silence: I have no reason to not be civil to you. I'd rather appreciate if you did call me Adam though. I don't plan to do anything to make you think that you could feel the need to hurt me in anyway.
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles* good. I really don't enjoy brutally mrdering people, it really is diffucult to get out of the carpet.
Elegant Silence: I'd rather not like blood on my white carpet. Not that it would matter if you killed me... *Shrugs*
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs smiling inocently loking at the ceiling akeing her lookalot younger than she apeared when glareing*
Elegant Silence: I'm not sure what else you would like me to say Miss Eponine.
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs* nothing much good sir. I will take my leave of you if you wish. Though i suppose as a gesture of good will i'll allow a question should you have one.
Elegant Silence: I will not impose. Since you got in, I'm sure you know your way out. Tell Criss I meant what I said.
TheMoonChildSai: and may i ask what you said?
Elegant Silence: Nothing important.
TheMoonChildSai: *rasised a eyebrow*
Elegant Silence: Eponine. Listen. I mean not to come off as rude, but Criss and I did do more than fuck. I consider her a friend... since I will no longer impose as a "lover" so to speak.
TheMoonChildSai: I can see that... which is practically why i'm standing here in a strange place with a strange man trying to figure out weather or not a miracle has actually occured or if your just like ever other fucking guy i've ever met outside the U and not at home trying to figure out how the fuck i'm gonna be able to go to my adoptive brothers funeral without being noticed by the... oh i'd say good dozen people who would enjoy nothing more than to murder me with there bare hands.
Elegant Silence: Like all the others? I am just a guy who happened to stumble across Criss one night. *Adam pauses.* Funeral? I'm sorry for your loss.
TheMoonChildSai: Your timings just wonderful you know. I found out my brother died, last night. As for like the others *turns away to leave her hair was cut short enough he could easily see the dozens of scars on her back* Lets just say i meant the world in general.
Elegant Silence: I apologize again. I did not know of all your troubles.
TheMoonChildSai: *turns back to look at him* I don;t know what to make of you good sir. I'll give you this much. Your not like the guys i'm used to dealing with.
Elegant Silence: I'm not like many Miss Epoinine.
TheMoonChildSai: I see why Mik likes you, as a friend at least, you remind me of somone i know. Your a hard nut to crack. *turns to go pauseing at the door* I'll be seeing ya Adam *leaves*
Elegant Silence: *Leans back against the wall where she was standing. He smiles.* Well I can see why she likes you...
///
Elegant Silence:*Mik is still sitting in the same place Alex left her. She'd seen Alta for a bit but she's alone now.*
TheMoonChildSai: *goes over to her sitting down* he's unharmed and strangly i maged to only startled him… I really was looking forward to putting the fear of god into him
Elegant Silence: *Looks up, her face is tear stained.* I knew he'd be a tough one to break. He's not afraid of much...
TheMoonChildSai: *sits down aross from her.* are you okay?
Elegant Silence: Yes? No... I don't know...
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles slightly* I... If it's y consolation i feel a little better... a battle of wits always does a soul good. *looks down* And this whole things helped me clear my head... I... Kurt... woulwant me to go on as best I could...
Elegant Silence: I don't deserve you.
TheMoonChildSai: *sighs* nor... nor do i... *looks down* I... I've been a hypocrite
Elegant Silence: What?
TheMoonChildSai: I... I'm still working at the Dove... *looks down touching her neck absently*
Elegant Silence: Oh.
TheMoonChildSai: Th,,..there were... some prblems... when i tried to quit,..
Elegant Silence: *Shrug* I no longer have the right to ask things of you.
TheMoonChildSai: *blinks then looks down* Mik... your suposed to be upset... I lied to you to... Then i acted like a hypocrite...
Elegant Silence: Doesn't matter. I hurt you.
TheMoonChildSai: *Sighs still looking down*
Elegant Silence: It really doesn't matter... What I did with Adam is... is not excuseable.
TheMoonChildSai : niether iswhat... what i tried to do... and what i would have done if Isaac kitty and Avery hadn't stopped me
Elegant Silence: It's all my fault... If I was here... If I hadn't...
TheMoonChildSai: It would have just been you tryin to figure out weather or not i was bleeding to death
Elegant Silence: *Stares at the floor, shivering at the loss of the the warm hoodie that had been with her for three days.*
TheMoonChildSai: cold?
Elegant Silence: Kinda... I was used to the jacket... Doesn't matter.
TheMoonChildSai: *reaches over to where her hoody lay on the other side of the mattress* here... it's big on me so it should fit
Elegant Silence: You... You don't have... to... I'm okay...
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs* I can just get another one... afterall... i have money right now
Elegant Silence: I... *reaches for the jacket and slips it on.*
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles thinly* better?
Elegant Silence: Yeah... thanks.
TheMoonChildSai: *drops her gaze to the round* are...are w okay?
Elegant Silence: That's... up to you.
TheMoonChildSai: I... I want us to be... cause... If... if... where not... i ... don't know if i'll be...
Elegant Silence: I... I'm not sure I deserve to be forgiven...
TheMoonChildSai: you may not deserve it... but sometimes... we have to realize whats more important... and... I think this is more important than my hurt feelings... If you want shower me with gifts and promises and what not... but mik... I love you... and you've stuck by me through so much... you stayed with me when most would have run for cover... you would have sacrificed yourself for me... I... We've been through to much together to end like this.
Elegant Silence: I don't... know what I'd do with out you... You were the first... the only after...after Alta... and I can't see me without you... I just can't.
TheMoonChildSai: You... You've kept me alive... in more ways than one... I love you MIk...
Elegant Silence: Forever and a day love. I love you.
TheMoonChildSai: past my dieing day...
Elegant Silence: And then some.
TheMoonChildSai: *looks down hugging her knees* I... I'm tired mik
Elegant Silence: *Looks up.* Huh? *Seems like she's kinda out of it.*
TheMoonChildSai: I'm tired...
Elegant Silence: Then sleep love.... I want to sit up and think...
TheMoonChildSai: *shakes her head* i don't want to sleep...
Elegant Silence: Oh. Okay.
TheMoonChildSai: *moves close to mik hoering inside her reach but not ouching her.*
Elegant Silence: *Looks over before practically flinging herself at Alex and wrapping around her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles closing hereyes and relaxing back into Miks embrace*...this... this is where we belong
Elegant Silence : I don't ever want to leave...
TheMoonChildSai: *shivering slightly curling closerfor warmth* Winters coming again soon
Elegant Silence: *Snuggles closer to her* Yeah... we could try to steal some blankets and stuf from Adam....
TheMoonChildSai: or we could ask
Elegant Silence: What fun would that be.
TheMoonChildSai: but it would mean when we really needed somthing i could steal it easier
Elegant Silence: Adam won't let us need things anymore. You saw where he lives... he'll take care of us and we don't need much Alta and Avery and Isaac and the others can share.
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles* yeah...
Elegant Silence: He's not... so bad right? *Her voice is a little timid again*
TheMoonChildSai: not... not the worst guy i've ver met.
Elegant Silence: Well he isn't Isaac, but he's the first guy I've met that didn't rape or TRY to rape me...
TheMoonChildSai: well i've met Kurt and Rick... I supose Xander counts but i think he would rape me if he asn't terified of me.
Elegant Silence: *Laughs out loud then covers her mouth quickly* God...
TheMoonChildSai: what?
Elegant Silence: We talk about rape like it's a fucking everyday thing...
TheMoonChildSai: sadly... i... i can't say i'm used to it... but the last time it happened i was like "Shit... not the fuck again... *mocks crying for ten second* Kittys gona throw a fit."… you... you get jaded
Elegant Silence: It does seem to happen that way... A year ago... I would've never thought that I'd be here...
TheMoonChildSai: *shrugs* a year ago almost exactly i made my first attempt at escape. The beating that got me had be out cold more than a day
Elegant Silence: I wasn't supposed to be here... I wouldn't change it though... maybe for what I could help you with but not myself.
TheMoonChildSai: I wouldn't be anywhere but here...
Elegant Silence: Me either. I have you and I have Alta and Avery.. and We have baby Isaac. *She smiles and runs a hand over her stomach.*
TheMoonChildSai: or Jaden
Elegant Silence: I have a feeling it's gonna be a boy... I can just... feel it.
TheMoonChildSai: but i don't understand little boys... I prefer little girls... lord knows i'cve already done a decent jo of raising one
Elegant Silence: Too many girls in this place. I could be wrong... *shrug*
TheMoonChildSai: *her smile fades thoughts turing back to the one boy whos no longer helping to even it out*
Elegant Silence: I'm sorry Alex...
TheMoonChildSai: I... I just ... can't believe he's gone...
Elegant Silence: It's not right.
TheMoonChildSai: *hums a moment then sings* melodies in the air, singing lil just aint fair sometimes i just can't believe your gone
and i'm sure the viw from heaven
beats the hell outa mine here
if we all believe in heaven maybe we'll make it through one more year
down here. *sighs looks down* he used to say he was going to hell, and as ong as he took Ray with him he didn't care.
Elegant Silence: He didn't deserve to die. I know it... but he's away from this now... he doesn't have to deal with this shit... He'll watch over you.
TheMoonChildSai: *smiles* J..just like Peirce... Maybe they'll even meet that way. Peirce woulda liked Kurt.
Elegant Silence: Maybe Bryson is there too... I know he's always with me... and so he has to know Pierce and Kurt.
TheMoonChildSai: *looks up* hey brothers, blood, adopted and soon to be in-laws. I hope all is well up there. Its rather shot to hell down here but... maybe it'll get better.
Elegant Silence: *Looks up as well but doesn't say anything.*
TheMoonChildSai: ...if we al believe in heaven... maybe we can make it through one more year
Elegant Silence: I won't let you go until I absolutely have to…
TheMoonChildSai: and... i'll not let go again...
Elegant Silence : I'll be here to catch you. Always
TheMoonChildSai: …and i you
Elegant Silence (9:49:39 PM): I'm still sorry..
TheMoonChildSai: I'm stull hurt.. but remember... more important things
Elegant Silence: I just... I can't let it go...
TheMoonChildSai: then learn from it...
Elegant Silence: Why don't you hate me.
TheMoonChildSai: ...because if i hated you then i wouldn't love you... If i didn't love you i'd lose the only thing that makes me get up and face the world most days
Elegant Silence: I don't deserve you... and I know...I know I sound like a broken rechord but I just don't understand it
TheMoonChildSai: *curls up in Miks lap*...I... *chuckles bitterly.* good thing... we had this talk... I... I remember why i feel crappy...
Elegant Silence: *Doesn't say anything just hold on tighter to Alex*
TheMoonChildSai: i... skipped my meds today... forgot... or maybe... lingering wants... ever since ... the doc started giving me all those pills to take the withdrawal takes longer to kick in
Elegant Silence: We need to get you to my doctor... she'll... she'll help us.
TheMoonChildSai: I don't wanna get my meds... but i i don't... well... withdrawl will start soon....
Elegant Silence: I'll get them for you if you want…
TheMoonChildSai: *reluctantly breaks away from Mik* there where they always are... just bring the bag. don't bother trying to figure out which bottle i need
Elegant Silence: Alright. *stand reluctantly and makes her way to their bed.*
TheMoonChildSai: *lies down on Averys mattrss staring at the ceiling. The eason she'd brought them up in the first place was because the normal nausia and lightheadeness was starting again. She knew even caught this early the more painful syntoms ere bound to start before the drugs kicked in,*
Elegant Silence: *Mik gets back as quickly as possible. sits down next to Alex and hands over the bag*
TheMoonChildSai: *sits up sorting through the bag puling out three perscription bottles and getting out the pills she needed. her hands were lightly clumsy nausia makeing the room decidedly against staying put*
Elegant Silence : *Puts and arm around the smaller girl* It'll be okay.
TheMoonChildSai: *takes the meds then leans against Mik closing her eyes* and to think only a few hours ago i wanted this...
Elegant Silence: *Holds onto her tightly* You wanted this?
TheMoonChildSai: this pain... not....not eactly cutting but... same effect i uess. *closes her eyes flinching pain flaring up again as the old meds finish pettering out and the new ones havn't kked in yet.*
Elegant Silence: How... how long for them to kick in?
TheMoonChildSai: ...don't know... I... i've gottne better abot taking them... I... I havn't missed them since the *flinches slightly forcing hersel to continue breathing steadily* ... i was a... with sir... and... and i had n..no way o telling time then...
Elegant Silence:*Rubs her back* It'll be okay. I'm here...
TheMoonChildSai: n...no matter.. what happens... we...we always end... likethis...
Elegant Silence: Like... this.
TheMoonChildSai: l...like this... together... in love.. getting through... rough things... shit... toet- *stops talking closing her mouth just trying to keep her bretahing stady her entire body gone rigid*
Elegant Silence: *Holds on tightly still* I don't think this is the greatest time but... but I'm here with you and and I love you...
TheMoonChildSai : *a long moment later she relaxes opening her eyes shyly* a...at least the rooms stopped spinning anyway
Elegant Silence: There you go quoting Rent again. *grins*
TheMoonChildSai: Like this better? *smiles* live in my house... i'll be your shelter.
Elegant Silence : I do like that. Maybe I like using our own words better...
TheMoonChildSai: *closes her eyes and sighs* tomorrow maybe? I'm tired.
Elegant Silence : Then sleep.
TheMoonChildSai : I'll have to get up and walk back to our mattress won't i?
Elegant Silence: No. I can take ya there. *grins* I like to carry you.
TheMoonChildSai: *wraps her arms around Miks neck*
Elegant Silence: *Stands up slowly, bringing Alex up with her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *lets Mik pick her up as usual not protesting anymore* glad you got a compact girlfriend?
Elegant Silence: Easy carry on access. *Grins* I love you.
TheMoonChildSai: Me *yawns* to... And now we're just being mushy
Elegant Silence: It's fun. *sets her down on their own mattress and sits down next to her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *pulls the blankets on and curls up* I'm glad to be back here... when your not here I just can't fall asleep here...
Elegant Silence: I'm glad were'... gonna be okay. I'm glad to be here to hold you.
TheMoonChildSai : *can barely keep her eyes open* m...me to
Elegant Silence: Sleep love. *wraps an arm around her.*
TheMoonChildSai: *closes her eyes and drifts off to sleep a smile on her face*
Elegant Silence: *Stays up and just watches over Alex.*