I dont even know...
Well this has been the absolute worst weekend of my LIFE....
Kevin was in a horrible car accident.. Oh my God i have never been so upset in my life! I dont really wanna explain again what all happend.. most of Pinecrest knows. But i am soo drained.. and i have nobody to talk to.. my "best friend" told me that she would be there.. but i havent heard from her since yesterday. Oh well.. life goes on right?
My main concern right now is Kevin.. he is home and doin much better but when we found him Sunday night.. i swear i thought he was dead.. and I lost it! He is my everything! I love him more than life itself.. thats why i feel sooo guilty! See i was supossed to go to that party and ride to church with him.. but i didnt want to go to that party b/c i didnt know the girl who was having it and it was a wedding shower so i didnt think it would be a good idea ya know! Well the car that hit Kevin hit him at about 70 mph on the passenger side... MY SIDE.. if i had of been in that jeep then i would be DEAD right now!! It is soooo hard to say that because, i sometimes wish it would have been me because then he wouldnt be hurting right now.. it would be me in the pain and i would rather be killed than to see him in pain! But i told him that and he told me that if i had of been there then he wouldnt be holding me right now.. and thats worse than a few bruises and cuts!! Which i can see where he is coming from.. but i went to school today and everyone could see the pain and strees on my face! I havent eatin really good in like 3 days.. I lost 6 lbs in a 24 hrs (not safe) I just couldnt imagine my life without him!! He is my BEST FRIEND..
you know whats really funny tho about this whole thing!! I found out who MY friends really were.. everyone told me, " ohh if you need me for anything at all let me know and ill be there!" BULL CRAP!!! Not a single person was there for me!! The only thing i wanted was to talk and CRY but.. NO thats toooo much to ask from my "FRIENDS".. so thats fine.. i just know who i can really turn to in my time of need!! w/e who needs friends like that anyway.. when i have my BEST FRIEND.. Kevin.. although Ill never stress him with all this cuz he needs to rest and get better so hopefully we can go to Prom saturday!! Kevin has the most amazing friends and family i have ever seen in my life!! there was like 30 of us at the hospital and at least 60 phone calls just makin sure he was okay! So to all of you who called and Prayed for him and all of us.. THANK YOU!! Your prayers made the difference.. thats why he is alive right now!! all my family did was give me crap about not goin to school or work on Monday!! sorry my priorties are different than most ppls!
I've been playin the blame game on myself and so has his mom.. she was soo torn.. I love that family more than anything in this world! but i told myself that if i wasnt onthe phone with him than he coulda paid more attention to the road.. but then if i wasnt on the phone than we wouldnt have know right away! so its kinda like what if.. but all i know is i am glad he is alive and well!!
GOD, i know that i have talked to you like a millin times in the past few days! but I know that this happened for a reason and i want to say thank you one more time for keepin all of us safe.. ESPECIALLY Kevin!! You know what your doin.. You know how much i love him and I want to spend FOREVER with him! After two months i know this is what is supossed to be and I thank You again for sending him to me!!
Kevin, Like I said before baby.. I was soo scared when i thought i lost you forever.. but your here and well thats all that matters!! I love you more than life itself and I will do everything i can to make sure that you get better and goin again!! I LOVE YOU KAKEE.. (tator) lol.. You mean everything to me and I cant wait till we make all our dreams come true!! You are truly the best boyfriend that i ahve ever had and I cant believe that you are ALL MINE!! Ill never take a day that we have together for granted!! this has really tought me a few things about life and what really matters the most! And you'll always be my number 1....
Kevin was in a horrible car accident.. Oh my God i have never been so upset in my life! I dont really wanna explain again what all happend.. most of Pinecrest knows. But i am soo drained.. and i have nobody to talk to.. my "best friend" told me that she would be there.. but i havent heard from her since yesterday. Oh well.. life goes on right?
My main concern right now is Kevin.. he is home and doin much better but when we found him Sunday night.. i swear i thought he was dead.. and I lost it! He is my everything! I love him more than life itself.. thats why i feel sooo guilty! See i was supossed to go to that party and ride to church with him.. but i didnt want to go to that party b/c i didnt know the girl who was having it and it was a wedding shower so i didnt think it would be a good idea ya know! Well the car that hit Kevin hit him at about 70 mph on the passenger side... MY SIDE.. if i had of been in that jeep then i would be DEAD right now!! It is soooo hard to say that because, i sometimes wish it would have been me because then he wouldnt be hurting right now.. it would be me in the pain and i would rather be killed than to see him in pain! But i told him that and he told me that if i had of been there then he wouldnt be holding me right now.. and thats worse than a few bruises and cuts!! Which i can see where he is coming from.. but i went to school today and everyone could see the pain and strees on my face! I havent eatin really good in like 3 days.. I lost 6 lbs in a 24 hrs (not safe) I just couldnt imagine my life without him!! He is my BEST FRIEND..
you know whats really funny tho about this whole thing!! I found out who MY friends really were.. everyone told me, " ohh if you need me for anything at all let me know and ill be there!" BULL CRAP!!! Not a single person was there for me!! The only thing i wanted was to talk and CRY but.. NO thats toooo much to ask from my "FRIENDS".. so thats fine.. i just know who i can really turn to in my time of need!! w/e who needs friends like that anyway.. when i have my BEST FRIEND.. Kevin.. although Ill never stress him with all this cuz he needs to rest and get better so hopefully we can go to Prom saturday!! Kevin has the most amazing friends and family i have ever seen in my life!! there was like 30 of us at the hospital and at least 60 phone calls just makin sure he was okay! So to all of you who called and Prayed for him and all of us.. THANK YOU!! Your prayers made the difference.. thats why he is alive right now!! all my family did was give me crap about not goin to school or work on Monday!! sorry my priorties are different than most ppls!
I've been playin the blame game on myself and so has his mom.. she was soo torn.. I love that family more than anything in this world! but i told myself that if i wasnt onthe phone with him than he coulda paid more attention to the road.. but then if i wasnt on the phone than we wouldnt have know right away! so its kinda like what if.. but all i know is i am glad he is alive and well!!
GOD, i know that i have talked to you like a millin times in the past few days! but I know that this happened for a reason and i want to say thank you one more time for keepin all of us safe.. ESPECIALLY Kevin!! You know what your doin.. You know how much i love him and I want to spend FOREVER with him! After two months i know this is what is supossed to be and I thank You again for sending him to me!!
Kevin, Like I said before baby.. I was soo scared when i thought i lost you forever.. but your here and well thats all that matters!! I love you more than life itself and I will do everything i can to make sure that you get better and goin again!! I LOVE YOU KAKEE.. (tator) lol.. You mean everything to me and I cant wait till we make all our dreams come true!! You are truly the best boyfriend that i ahve ever had and I cant believe that you are ALL MINE!! Ill never take a day that we have together for granted!! this has really tought me a few things about life and what really matters the most! And you'll always be my number 1....