(no subject)
I feel the need to update, though I don't know what all to say.
I just ate some texmex eggrolls from work, along with a couple of Jumping Cow amber ales. Way to go, packing in the calories before bed.
So yeah, school has been eating away at my social life and my confidence at the same time. This one seminar I am in kicks my ass. First of all drama isn't my forte, secondly it is a small class so even when I don't really have much to say on a play or I didn't quite understand some parts, I am expected to jump in the discussion with my opinions. I get called on at the worst times and end up sounding like a bumbling idiot. The professor is pretty harsh too. And my classmates, well, a lot of them are brilliant, which adds to the intimidation I already feel and makes me even more afraid to open my mouth. I sit there paralyzed with fear for 3 hours every Tuesday night. Add to that the fact that many of said classmates live with their parents still, and work very little if at all, and live in the area. I am sure if I didn't have to stress about the rent or car payments or groceries or a 45 minute commute I could do better in the class. Still, I honestly lose sleep worrying about this class and thinking everyone laughs at what an idiot I am.
So I am not going tomorrow. Stupid professor assigning obscure plays that are no longer in print. I couldn't find them, so, there is no point in going to class tomorrow. I will look like even more of a fool.
On a more positive note, I am doing pretty well in my Fitzgerald/Hemingway seminar. That is cause Dr. Ruiz-Velasco is rad and my classmates are good people. Fitzgerald and Hemingway, I GET them. Hemingway even more so. He just makes sense to me probably more than any other author I can think of right now.
This is a boring entry. I guess I needed to vent this sort of stuff. In 14 months I will have paid off my car and most if not all of my credit cards. Maybe then this grad school stuff will be easier.
Eh I will post a more insightful entry some other time.
I just ate some texmex eggrolls from work, along with a couple of Jumping Cow amber ales. Way to go, packing in the calories before bed.
So yeah, school has been eating away at my social life and my confidence at the same time. This one seminar I am in kicks my ass. First of all drama isn't my forte, secondly it is a small class so even when I don't really have much to say on a play or I didn't quite understand some parts, I am expected to jump in the discussion with my opinions. I get called on at the worst times and end up sounding like a bumbling idiot. The professor is pretty harsh too. And my classmates, well, a lot of them are brilliant, which adds to the intimidation I already feel and makes me even more afraid to open my mouth. I sit there paralyzed with fear for 3 hours every Tuesday night. Add to that the fact that many of said classmates live with their parents still, and work very little if at all, and live in the area. I am sure if I didn't have to stress about the rent or car payments or groceries or a 45 minute commute I could do better in the class. Still, I honestly lose sleep worrying about this class and thinking everyone laughs at what an idiot I am.
So I am not going tomorrow. Stupid professor assigning obscure plays that are no longer in print. I couldn't find them, so, there is no point in going to class tomorrow. I will look like even more of a fool.
On a more positive note, I am doing pretty well in my Fitzgerald/Hemingway seminar. That is cause Dr. Ruiz-Velasco is rad and my classmates are good people. Fitzgerald and Hemingway, I GET them. Hemingway even more so. He just makes sense to me probably more than any other author I can think of right now.
This is a boring entry. I guess I needed to vent this sort of stuff. In 14 months I will have paid off my car and most if not all of my credit cards. Maybe then this grad school stuff will be easier.
Eh I will post a more insightful entry some other time.