Taking charge
I actually heard about it a very long time ago (at an LLL meeting in Idaho, so not pre-Ben, unfortionately) but hadn't managed to get around to reading "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" because I didn't really see any pressing need for it at the time. Well, the book came up again at my most recent LLL meeting, and then sugabeats mentioned that she had used
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the significance in not telling names is a jewish superstition (yes, its weird. i've even asked this before. "grandma, if we believe that everything is up to hashem then why do we worry about the evil eye" and trust me the answer was not satisfactory in the least)
you don't tell that you're pregnant until you are 12 weeks along and past the risk of miscarriage (my aunt waited until 20 weeks, though almost everyone KNEW BY LOOKING AT HER by that point, so it kinda stole some of the thunder, you know?)
if you have a miscarriage, you don't tell that you did, or that you were ever pregnant in the first place.
you don't tell the name until the baby is born and OK. orthodox wait to name the child until the bris (8th day of life) for a boy, and until a baby-naming ceremony can be held for a girl (that one is newer and less common though ...)
you don't have any baby stuff in the house until after the baby is born and is OK. a friend usually holds it for you. its so that if your baby dies, you don't come home empty-handed to a whole crap load of baby stuff that makes you sadder.
i didnt' do all of these things with ben, and don't really know what i will/won't do with future children. but seriously, before he was born, no one knew his name. not our best friends, not our parents, NO ONE. so don't feel too bad. :-)
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