Correct me if you're wrong,
* Today I got to thinking about wisdom. Sorry, last word aside that sounds like Carrie Bradshaw. I hate the phrase 'got to thinkin' 'bout'.
* So, who is the wisest of the following? Think you know already? Wait! See if you can identify those responsible for the following quotations - answers on a postcard!
Aristotle, Spiderman, Sigmund Freud, Leonardo Da Vinci, Charles Darwin, Oscar Wilde, Confucius, Albert Einstein, Mahatma Gandhi, Jesus Christ, George W Bush.
a) "We cannot learn without pain."
This is probably the ideal quotation for someone in my profession, although it completely goes against what we were taught in my TEFL course. Who said it? Was it someone in Oliver Twist, was it George Bush? Jesus perhaps - he was big on pain wasn't he?
b) "Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change."
I don't find this wise. It's the type of thing I would say if I was drunk, in an argument, without thinking about it first. Maybe that just means I am super wise. But In my opinion it's the type of thing where you could take out the word 'never' and people would consider it just as wise. Who knows who said it?
c) "Whenever you are confronted with an opponent, conquer him with love"
This reminds me of the 'when they want something in Taiwan they give something away' 'oh do they? That must be why they're such a dominant world power' routine. Probably not Spiderman or George Bush.
d) "The great question that has never been answered and which I have not been able to answer....is, What does a woman want?"
In my experience, nothing I have to offer! Hah! As all the wise people I chose were MEN it could be any of them couldn't it? The only ones that I know have stable relationships are Spiderman and George Bush.
e) "With great power comes great responsibility"
My students today assumed this was George Bush. It could be Jesus though, right? Or Arsistotle? Are any of these people really different in any way or does it jsut depend on who is choosing to write down select snippets of their conversation? Have I addressed the fundamental issue here too early? Is anybody reading this? Lubor very neatly pointed out that Gandhi was very much about marketing. Jesus was too, without question, he even gave free samples of miracles and suchlike. We don't even have HIS word about any of it! Anyway, carry on...
f) "I think that when God created man, he somewhat overestimated his ability."
So, presumably not a Christian, but that only rules out about three. Could it be Darwin? Surely Da Vinci would not be so cynical? Surely most people who aren't me are familiar enough with these quotations to not enjoy this game?
g) "The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing."
That's a good one isn't it. Must be Spiderman, right? Or George Bush? I swear, almost all of these sound like Spiderman and George Bush to me, am I just not well read enough? Not widely read enough certainly. Hah!
h) "Obstacles cannot crush me."
Bush, Schwarzenegger, The Incredible Hulk? I think this is the worst of them all. Of COURSE obstacles can crush you, if not Obstacle 1, what about Obstacle 2. What about A PIANO or AN ANVIL? Maybe it's einstein, he thwarted Newton right? Falling objects mean nothing to him.
i) "A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that doesn't exist."
This sounds like a lateral thinking puzzle in the making. Who is a lateral thinker? must be one of the clever ones surely?
j) "Why do you call me good ? No one is good but God alone."
Definitely George Bush.
k) "I have opinions of my own. Strong opinions. But I don’t always agree with them."
Definitely Oscar Wilde.
* Sorry, don't mean to answer them for you, just trying to toy with your minds.
* Milhouse was down lask weekend and we danced mediaevaly and he missed his plane home. Yikes.
* Tomash had a new baby! And he said he'd email me a picture but he hasn't! Tomash also said that after every lesson with me he has a good sensation/feeling, depending on the meaning of the translation. How nice! This was a rare moment of job satisfaction, a term I thought was certainly an oxymoron. However, teaching as a whole unless one makes the goal to entertain one's self is bound to be quite low in that area overall. If I wash a pot, I can see whether it's clean or not. I am constantly concerned about whether or not my students have ever learnt anything from/by/with me. The Caledonian School is a business though. Not a school. They call the students clients. As long as they are satisfied customers, technically, nobody cares what they learn. Yikes!
* Lubor pointed out today how India's economy could only have improved from further extension of Britain's rule, therefore technically, Gandhi did more harm than good. He just threw that out there, I'm never sure whether Lubor likes playing devil's advocate or the pantomime villain, but he has a knack of being right about stuff. I never realised Albert Einstein was (like Lubor) in favour of Hiroshima and Nagasaki being blown up, aparently it's a scale thing. You put the millions of dead bodies on one side of the scale, and calculate/guesstimate how many would be on the other side, had said blowing up not ocurred. I'm no mathematician. No black cats in my dark rooms, if there were, I'd stay the hell away.
* Apparently being stupid is a very important part of George Bush's marketing, and playing up his misquotes and blunders is part of that.
* Yesterday I was reminded of the lovely way Tom Petty pronounces 'mediocrity' on The Last DJ as I watched American Grafitti. So I wonder if that song was written about the wolf man or John Peel or perhaps even one of the other DJs who ever existed, none of whom I've heard of. I could be a DJ. I'd be great. I'd be the best DJ in the world. These are the songs I'd play:
* I'm reading White Oleander, which is as good as the film, better in that it has more in it, but the writing isn't particularly amazing. Particularly amazing writing, for those who care, can be found in a couple of TS Eliot poems (Lovesong, hollow men), a couple of Alkaline Trio songs(mr chainsaw, emma), and not many other places.
* Happy birthday mum last week, happy birthday both Sheila and Maurice (I think) this week, or at least this month, actually I think I missed Sheila's... and ben, who certainly doesn't read this, and maybe some other poeple, not that sure.
* Hang on a minute I just remembered Shakespeare, he was occasionally pretty good too. I saw Polanski's Macbeth on Sunday.
* In non-news, I was far too drunk to be around people I would see again on Friday. There was some sort of free drink barbeque end of season at the school. I met a guy called Colin from San Francisco who looked like a guy called Colin from Canada. I bought the football crowd drinks and went on about how much better at football they were than me and how that's why I've missed the last 3 weeks. This is a lie. I was simply lazy. At some point a bit later I recall wandering the courtyard complaining loudly about how all my friends had left me and what bastards they were and eventually I eneded up going to some bar with Wes, who I dont really know but is nice, and drinking Becherovka and dribbling and dancing on my own to the Killers amongst a herd of very uninteresting looking people.
* I stole five bolts from the table and stuck them in my jeans.