(no subject)
Summer is coming to a close. Just as well I guess, it hasn't been anything real special. I've been going through something this whole summer, yet I don't know what. I'm sure people have noticed some strange moods and attitudes from me. It's weird, I kinda feel like I wanna be aloof and kind of stay away from everything and not have anything to do with anybody. Life is just so blah, there is nothind to get excited about anymore and it all just seems like a hopeless dream. I just ordered a custom Music Man guitar for $1,700 the other day, and somehow that doesn't even excite me. I yearn for college, just to have a chance to escape and start anew. A clean slate is just about what I need right now. My current life has become to clustered and heavy and just not exciting. My friends are collapsing around me, each having their own set of issues to deal with. I'm just not feeling very fufilled I guess. It doesn't help either that I'm always lonely and I'm just desperate for that contact my life is so lacking right now. Don't get me wrong, I'm not horribly depressed or anything, actually I'm not in the least bit, its just I feel blah. I wish I could meet a girl. I love meeting new people, but I just wanna meet and get to know a girl, and feel important again. I miss being cared about, I miss having someone to call and just talk to. I miss caring about someone.
I just basically kinda feel sick. I don't know how to explain it but kinda like something hanging over me. Even when I'm out having fun or I'm happy, something seems to be missing, and lurking in the possible future. I need a change.
I just basically kinda feel sick. I don't know how to explain it but kinda like something hanging over me. Even when I'm out having fun or I'm happy, something seems to be missing, and lurking in the possible future. I need a change.