Mamma Mia OMIGODMYEYESANDEARS
Last night, Glenn decided we needed a cuddle-and-watch a movie night.
So popped in Mamma Mia, which he bought for mindless costume shop watching when it came out on DVD this Tuesday.
Jesus God, there has never been a greater affront to the movie musical genre ever made. Ever. Seriously.
Now, I know it's fluff. I know there's no plot, and the songs are just stuck in. I knew that going in. I'm okay with that.
But what I didn't know was that, rather than rescoring and rearranging the songs so that they would make sense being sung by different voices, multiple voices, a chorus of voices, that they'd just cue up the karaoke tracks and dub in the actors - a beat to a beat and a half out of sync with the video - and just let it go at that.
Also, if you're going to set a film in a hotel on a Greek island, LET US SEE THE GODDAMN HOTEL. Jesus. The DP should've been shot for how shitty he made paradise look.
Thank you, though, for having Dakin from History Boys shirtless 9/10ths of the movie, and Colin Firth wearing just enough that he remained sexily middle-aged. Without that eye-candy, all I would have to distract me from the hideous travesty that Mamma Mia became on screen would have been the embroidered duvet on Donna's bed, which I COVET.
Blech. Blech. Blech.
So popped in Mamma Mia, which he bought for mindless costume shop watching when it came out on DVD this Tuesday.
Jesus God, there has never been a greater affront to the movie musical genre ever made. Ever. Seriously.
Now, I know it's fluff. I know there's no plot, and the songs are just stuck in. I knew that going in. I'm okay with that.
But what I didn't know was that, rather than rescoring and rearranging the songs so that they would make sense being sung by different voices, multiple voices, a chorus of voices, that they'd just cue up the karaoke tracks and dub in the actors - a beat to a beat and a half out of sync with the video - and just let it go at that.
Also, if you're going to set a film in a hotel on a Greek island, LET US SEE THE GODDAMN HOTEL. Jesus. The DP should've been shot for how shitty he made paradise look.
Thank you, though, for having Dakin from History Boys shirtless 9/10ths of the movie, and Colin Firth wearing just enough that he remained sexily middle-aged. Without that eye-candy, all I would have to distract me from the hideous travesty that Mamma Mia became on screen would have been the embroidered duvet on Donna's bed, which I COVET.
Blech. Blech. Blech.