(no subject)
Best intro to a song?
Either Islands's, "Rough Gem" or Of Montreal's "So Begins Our Alabee"
All that I ever listen to lately is shit like that. I can't get enough of the indie pop blah blah stuff. Or just Indie in general
I can't believe all of my compadres are basically done with school.
The jealousy is seeping from me. Oozing out of my aching pores.
BLECH
I can't wait until a year from now. When I finally know where I'm going for the next 4 years of my life, and I have everything in front of me
I desire that so much right now.
More than I would even believe a month ago. I just need to leave. But at the same time, I guess I don't have a choice so this whole way of thinking is in vain. What can I really do about it? Have fun so that the next year of my life moves quickly. I'm dreading autumn. Because it means an end. To summer and being carefree, to a mental break, to essentially my friends (until I visit them or they visit me of course!).
It's just a little disheartening.
At least I have a relationship I suppose. I mean that makes things a bit better. I feel so giddy with Chad, and he really makes me happy. I would never have thought him capable of that when I first met him in like 9th grade. He's so quiet. And that's usually such a turn-off to me. But he has really shown me that quiet people are really just like everybody else once you get to know them. God, I sound like I'm prejudiced against quiet people. I guess that I was.
I kinda feel/hope that I actually have and am making Chad come out of his shell a little. Not that he'll ever be even as outspoken as me (as if I'm soooo outspoken), but it's some step forward.
I hate going to dance lately.
I am not really sure. I just never feel like going, and when I'm there, I just want to go home. I haven't been a HUGE fan of dance for the past few years, but this year, and lately especially, it's been so much worse. I just feel like fucking around and dance doesn't really open any doors for having fun or being playful. Was dance some opportunity for me to be playful before? Or am I imagining things and suddenly desire dance to be this random new way of achieving this outlet. I don't know. I just want to dance around my room, or in the grass in a huge field with flowers and sunshine.
Dance is still fun sometimes. I just want something new. It's so scheduled. Over and over and over again. Barre, and more barre, and it's just so boring. And I'm babbling.
I just want something new. In dance, in school, in experience, in encounters, in life.
But it's not my time yet I suppose.
And so, I must get ready and go to dance (hah).
Why must I babble so. Really
Either Islands's, "Rough Gem" or Of Montreal's "So Begins Our Alabee"
All that I ever listen to lately is shit like that. I can't get enough of the indie pop blah blah stuff. Or just Indie in general
I can't believe all of my compadres are basically done with school.
The jealousy is seeping from me. Oozing out of my aching pores.
BLECH
I can't wait until a year from now. When I finally know where I'm going for the next 4 years of my life, and I have everything in front of me
I desire that so much right now.
More than I would even believe a month ago. I just need to leave. But at the same time, I guess I don't have a choice so this whole way of thinking is in vain. What can I really do about it? Have fun so that the next year of my life moves quickly. I'm dreading autumn. Because it means an end. To summer and being carefree, to a mental break, to essentially my friends (until I visit them or they visit me of course!).
It's just a little disheartening.
At least I have a relationship I suppose. I mean that makes things a bit better. I feel so giddy with Chad, and he really makes me happy. I would never have thought him capable of that when I first met him in like 9th grade. He's so quiet. And that's usually such a turn-off to me. But he has really shown me that quiet people are really just like everybody else once you get to know them. God, I sound like I'm prejudiced against quiet people. I guess that I was.
I kinda feel/hope that I actually have and am making Chad come out of his shell a little. Not that he'll ever be even as outspoken as me (as if I'm soooo outspoken), but it's some step forward.
I hate going to dance lately.
I am not really sure. I just never feel like going, and when I'm there, I just want to go home. I haven't been a HUGE fan of dance for the past few years, but this year, and lately especially, it's been so much worse. I just feel like fucking around and dance doesn't really open any doors for having fun or being playful. Was dance some opportunity for me to be playful before? Or am I imagining things and suddenly desire dance to be this random new way of achieving this outlet. I don't know. I just want to dance around my room, or in the grass in a huge field with flowers and sunshine.
Dance is still fun sometimes. I just want something new. It's so scheduled. Over and over and over again. Barre, and more barre, and it's just so boring. And I'm babbling.
I just want something new. In dance, in school, in experience, in encounters, in life.
But it's not my time yet I suppose.
And so, I must get ready and go to dance (hah).
Why must I babble so. Really