[Fic] Resurgence

[thesockmonster]

Title: Resurgence
Pairing: Joonmyun/Kris
Rating: NC-17
Length: 8400w
Author's Note: originally written for exolliarmus. ^^
Summary: HP!AU - Joonmyun isn't prepared for the feelings that come hand-in-hand with his first love coming back to teach at Hogwarts alongside him.



Joonmyun has just taken a bite of his warm apple-buttered toast when he sees the approaching owl veering toward his open bay windows. He doesn’t think anything of it, sighing in bliss at the taste of his breakfast while the steam curls from his freshly steeped tea. Outside his home is the chaos of the world rushing to work before they’re late - horns honking, people cursing out their windows, pedestrians too busy texting to look up and notice they’ve walked into traffic. But Joonmyun hears none of it.

There’s a charm around his home that keeps that infernal racket out and lends credence to the calm, peaceful morning Joonmyun craves. Living in the muggle world isn’t so bad when he can pick and choose what he lets seep into his life. He even partakes of the muggle way of life when the mood suits him. A mix of both muggle and wizard has always been the easiest for Joonmyun.

Although sometimes he does prefer the muggle post system to having an owl nearly take his head off. He has to duck, nearly tipping his tea on its side as a letter flutters from the owl’s claws. It lands atop Joonmyun’s toast, butter soaking into the envelope. The owl flies off with a screech, snagging one of the treats that Joonmyun always leaves on his window sill.

A simple charm and a flourish of his wand levitates the letter and cleans the butter away. The letter appears very official with its sprawling cursive in green ink over the front. Of course, all letters that Joonmyun receives from Hogwarts, whether they’re official or not, appear important. This particular letter, he knows, is official. The new school year is starting soon and he’s been awaiting the information that comes before every term.

It’s business as usual it seems as Joonmyun busies himself with scanning the contents. The common rooms have gone through some upkeep. The Bloody Baron has made it known that he’s sanctioned off one of the second floor corridors so they need to be on the lookout for him attempting to frighten any of the students. The only thing remotely interesting to Joonmyun is the change of staff. Madam Hooch has been the flying instructor and Quidditch coach at Hogwarts since Joonmyun was attending, but she’s stepping down to enjoy a quiet retirement in the Galapagos.

Joonmyun takes a swallow of his tea only to spit it back out, littering the letter in front of him with droplets that smudge the ink. Some of it goes down his throat the wrong way and he pats his chest, eyes watering during a brief coughing fit.

He must have read that wrong. He returns the letter to its original state with another spell, wand set aside as Joonmyun’s eyes focus on a name he hasn’t seen in a long time.

Kris Wu, the Keeper for the Stonewall Stormers, has announced his retirement from professional quidditch and is now taking up a post at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. As Madam Hooch’s replacement.

Joonmyun sits back in his chair, the letter fluttering to the floor to land at his feet, unnoticed. His heart has leapt into his throat, making it hard to breathe. Joonmyun hasn’t thought about Kris in a long time. They’d gone to Hogwarts together, been sorted during the same ceremony. And while they were in two different houses, it didn’t stop them from sparking an inter-house friendship - a friendship that by fifth year, had turned into something more.

Joonmyun remembers every stomach swooping kiss, every stolen moment between classes and during vacation, every promise they made to each other like the outside world didn’t matter. Things that perfect never last. Even if they were drunk off the feeling of first love and all the dreams they had of being together, it didn’t stop the inevitable.

They were on two different paths. It was nearing the end of their seventh year when Joonmyun and Kris sat down for The Talk. They’d commandeered the Room of Requirement to ensure they were alone before amicably coming to the conclusion that it would be better to end things the way they were. Kris was heading for a promising career in Quidditch - after all, he’d been the best Keeper Hufflepuff House had ever seen - and Joonmyun had his own plans to join the Ministry.

Joonmyun can still remember how it hurt to leave each other outside the door, knowing they wouldn’t be making plans to meet at the Three Broomsticks to sip butterbeer in the corner or sneak down to the pitch before curfew to steal a few last moments together. Sitting in the present, Joonmyun realizes the pain has eased, but not lessened. No one ever truly gets over their first love.

Joonmyun’s had relationships since then, but none that were as everlasting as Kris. It feels like a punch in the gut to think about Kris walking the same halls with him again. Since he’d taken up the post of Charms Professor a few years ago, the halls of Hogwarts have been a safe haven. And now . . . he sighs and slumps in his chair as his tea grows cold.

How is he supposed to act as an authority figure when he suddenly feels seventeen years old again?

True to form, the flames in Joonmyun’s fireplace crackle to life, orange popping to green and the one person who could make any of this worse other than Kris himself steps out. Baekhyun is wiping at the soot on his robe with a scowl as if he couldn’t just magic it away. He seems not to have a care for the mess he’s leaving on Joonmyun’s carpet. As per usual.

He traipses right over to Joonmyun’s breakfast and steals his toast, fingers nicking the cup of forgotten tea to sip on as well. Joonmyun wonders if relocating his home to a dragon preserve would deter Baekhyun from barging in without an invitation.

“So your hot ex is our new coach,” Baekhyun rudely begins, crumbs from Joonmyun’s toast still lingering on the corners of his mouth. “This year is going to be great. You think he’d sign my-”

“No.”

Joonmyun doesn’t have the luxury of marinating in his emotional turmoil for long before he’s thrust into preparations for the upcoming year. As the Charms Professor, he is responsible for students of all years - first through seventh - and that can be tiresome, but worth it. He’s one of the first classes a first year will take and that leaves an impression on their young minds. Joonmyun takes pride in his teaching, in instructing the future of the wizarding world and muggle alike. There’s no time for distraction when his primary concern is giving his absolute best.

Of course, all such thoughts take flight, abandoning Joonmyun in his time of need when he steps into the Great Hall - empty save for where the faculty is gathering along one of the tables in a clump - and sees one head standing tall above the rest.

“Kris,” he breathes, stomach clenching and mouth thick. He swallows, straightening his hands over his clothing - a tshirt displaying a muggle band and a pair of comfortable jeans. When he’d dressed for traveling, he hadn’t anticipated on a run-in so soon and now he thinks he should have at least slipped on his robes over his clothes before making an appearance.

As luck would have it, Baekhyun walks in right behind Joonmyun, quite literally running into his back and sending Joonmyun stumbling forward. Joonmyun also makes this horrible noise when he tries to keep from falling on his face and it draws everyone’s attention. He spins around to pin Baekhyun with a well earned glare, mouth opening to give his friend a stern lecture on manners, when another voice breaks through his thoughts.

“Joonmyun,” Kris greets from behind him. The very sound has a shiver running down Joonmyun’s spine and he suddenly stands taller, eyes wide as he plasters on a fake, trying too hard smile when he turns to see him up close for the first time since their schooldays. “It’s good to see you.”

“Wow,” Joonmyun replies, eyes dragging down and then up Kris’ body. “You look great.” Great might be an understatement. Kris had always been the gangly sort, with his arms and legs too long for his body. Not to mention his huge hands that were good for a lot of things, except for wand waving. It seems Kris has finally settled into his longness, his jeans and white button-up showcasing how well he’s taken care of himself. And his once black hair is now blond, longer than he usually kept it and it only makes his mouth look that much more pink.

“Kris!” Baekhyun suddenly chimes in, stepping around Joonmyun and hip-checking him out of the way. “It’s wonderful to finally meet someone who knew Joonmyun when he was younger.” Oh this conversation can’t be headed anywhere good. Baekhyun has that smile on his face that always leads to trouble. “Tell me,” he starts, eyes sliding over to linger on Joonmyun for a moment, “did Joonmyun have a stick up his ass back when he was in school too or is it a more recent addition to his personality?”

Joonmyun is going to kill Baekhyun. It’s not as if Hogwarts can’t find a replacement Potions Professor on short notice. They’ve done it before.

Joonmyun elbows Baekhyun in the ribs, delighting in the wheeze his former friend lets out. Kris, however, is chuckling. It’s been a long time since Joonmyun’s heard his laugh and it brings back all these memories that crash straight through him. The ache settles in his chest because there was a time when he was used to that sound, when he took it for granted. It’s hits harder than he anticipated and Joonmyun grimaces.

As if no time at all has passed, Kris reaches out and smooths his thumb between Joonmyun’s eyebrows. “I’m sure he’s not that bad,” Kris answers Baekhyun, all while his eyes stay trained on Joonmyun’s face. “You just have to know how to handle him.”

Baekhyun makes this delighted noise even as Joonmyun’s heart races and his mouth goes dry. “And how does one handle Joonmyun?”

Joonmyun whips his head in Baekhyun’s direction, letting out a warning hiss.

Baekhyun hops a step back, hands raised defensively. “And I’m the Slytherin,” Baekhyun teases, finally walking away.

“You’ll get used to him,” Joonmyun sighs.

Kris just seems amused, still smiling at Joonmyun in that same fond way he used to years ago. “I’m sure.”

There are old photographs Joonmyun has from when he was a student at Hogwarts; he spares them a glance sometimes when he’s feeling nostalgic. He hasn’t done it as often over the last few years because he’s drifting away. He’s not that kid who used to strive for perfection, punishing himself with more time spent in the library and away from Hogsmeade when he didn’t get perfect marks on every assignment.

He pulls them out now. The photo album is dusty, having been kept in a small box underneath Joonmyun’s bed. He’s been teaching at Hogwarts long enough that he doesn’t clean out his quarters every summer anymore, preferring to travel light. He brushes his fingers over the edges of yellowing paper. It was nothing more than a stack parchment that he’d magicked together with a binding spell when he’d first made it. He hadn’t thought much of keeping memories alive this way when he’d first started school, but the years proved to be different.

The first few pictures are nothing special - snapshots of Joonmyun and his small, but dedicated, group of friends. There’s one of them at the lake, sitting with their feet in the water as they laugh about some joke that Joonmyun’s forgotten. Another picture shows them down at Hogsmeade, butterbeer in hand and scarves wrapped so high around their faces all you can see is their eyes. There’s flurries of movement behind them, but they’re content with an arm around each other, butterbeer sloshing over cold fingers.

The more Joonmyun flips through, the more Kris appears. He starts off as the odd addition to their group every few photos, but then Joonmyun sees the progression of Kris shifting nearer to Joonmyun, his eyes always on Joonmyun even when everyone else’s are on the camera. Joonmyun hadn’t even realized.

The evidence is here now, with every captured memory of their romance spilled onto the pages hastily put together by a third year who had no idea what the future held for him. A longing aches through Joonmyun’s chest when he gets to the final pictures. There’s a lot with just him and Kris now, the two of them always touching, always smiling, sometimes stealing kisses. They move around, carefree and lost in a bubble of time that makes Joonmyun envious.

What he wouldn’t give to relive that. Time has made Joonmyun realize that nothing tastes as sweet or burns as hot as a first love and he’s still trapped in the embers, choking on all the decisions he made that took him from Kris’ side. It’s not that Joonmyun hasn’t had a pleasing life. He has. It certainly isn’t what he’d been planning; he hadn’t anticipated getting pigeonholed as a parchment pusher in a low-level ministry job. He’d wanted to do great things with his education. Filing isn’t great.

He’d never given a thought to teaching, but stuck in a dead end job with no hope for his future, Joonmyun jumped at the opportunity when it presented itself. And he’s never regretted that choice. Now it just stirs up old, fond memories that have him aching, wishing he could go back to then just for a little while. No one’s ever made him feel as comfortable with himself as Kris. No one usually gave a thought to Joonmyun until Kris wedged himself into his life and brightened it with his smile.

It’s been so long since Joonmyun thought about Kris and now it’s all coming at once. His eyes sting with tears, but he blinks them back. He’s a grown man now. He’s a Professor at Hogwarts and he can control his emotional whims. As much as he’d like to head down to where Kris is settling in just to see him, touch him, ask him if there’s hope of rekindling their spark., he’s not bold enough for something like that. And he’s also not ignorant enough to think that Kris wouldn’t have moved on long ago. As a successful professional quidditch player, Kris would have had tons of witches and wizards just clamoring for his attention. To think that he’d still hold on to something for plain, unimpressive Joonmyun would only give way to false hope.

No, it’s better for Joonmyun to keep his feelings tucked away with the memories, closing the lid over the box and sliding it back underneath the bed to be forgotten again. He has more important things to worry about - like getting his pre-term checklist for each year marked off.

Sorting ceremonies are always a highlight of the year. Joonmyun looks on fondly as the first years stumble forward, some of them in robes they still need to grow into, and with trepidation on their little faces. Baekhyun is sitting on one side of him, leaning close to Joonmyun because it wouldn’t be a day at Hogwarts without Baekhyun trying to distract him. Usually, he’s attempting to draw Joonmyun into one of his schemes. He never lets a year go by without slipping a potion to someone. It’s always harmless and it’s always a member of the staff.

Last year, he’d slipped a Babbling Brew to Jongin, the Professor for Care of Magical Creatures. Joonmyun’s never known anyone to coddle and coo over the most horrific of animals the way Jongin does save for their previous Gamekeeper, Hagrid. Only Jongin doesn’t have the giant blood in his veins and he’s positively dwarfed by his pets. Joonmyun uses that term loosely.

Baekhyun leans close, nearly tipping himself right over into Joonmyun’s lap, to make sure Joonmyun can hear him. He’s done a fantastic job of ignoring Baekhyun so far; he’s still embarrassed by that whole thing in front of Kris.

“What if I accidentally spilled a little veritaserum into Kris’ pumpkin juice over breakfast?” Baekhyun schemes.

Joonmyun’s stomach lurches dangerously.

“Then we can see if he’s still carrying a torch for you.”

“Don’t you dare,” Joonmyun hisses through his teeth, eyes darting around to make sure no one is paying them any attention. It’s just Joonmyun’s luck that Kris is the only one staring right at him. He has this pensive look on his face, eyebrows drawn before he’s turning away to pay attention to the last of the sorting.

Baekhyun rests his hand in the crook of Joonmyun’s elbow to get his attention, tipping just far enough to have him sliding right out of his seat. He hits the floor and Joonmyun wishes he was the one down there to hide his shame. Why is he so unfortunate when it comes to friends?

The beginning of the year is always swamped with getting everyone settled in and started on their first assignments. Joonmyun’s job is fulfilling, but undeniably tiring, and he retires to his quarters at the end of all classes. His students seem to be settling in nicely, which leaves Joonmyun with more planning time. He doesn’t like to prepare his curriculums fully until he assesses the potential of each class and then he creates a curriculum for each one based on their skill level. It’s hard work, and it keeps him cooped up. He only spares time to drag himself out for meals - something Baekhyun has managed to take personal offense to.

The colder weather sneaks up on Joonmyun, keeping indoors until he’s finally free to head down to Hogsmeade for a bit of a breather. Everyone’s in their scarves already, the leaves on the trees turning orange and yellow as he makes his way down. It’s no surprise that Joonmyun’s worked himself into October without a break. But now he’s refreshed, lighter since he’s finished all his schedules for the year.

It also helpfully eliminated pesky thoughts about Kris and the heartache that would follow. Joonmyun is a grown man; he simply must get over trivial things like school aged romances.

Joonmyun finds himself sitting at a table for two in Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop. He’s sipping on rosemary tea, alone with his thoughts until he’s rudely interrupted.

“I knew I’d find you here,” Baekhyun quips, taking the seat opposite Joonmyun. There’s a cup of tea in his hand - peppermint by the smell of it. “Hiding away and pining for your lost love.”

“What are you on about?” Joonmyun asks, not entirely investing his attention to the conversation.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but all the patrons in this fine establishment are couples and you, my friend, are dreadfully single.”

“I wouldn’t use the word dreadfully,” Joonmyun responds. “If it was such a bother, I’d remedy it.”

Baekhyun scoffs, rolling his eyes as he reaches out and pats Joonmyun’s hand sympathetically. “Sure you would. Because you’re not socially inept or anything.”

“It’s a life choice,” Joonmyun scowls. “Dating would be difficult when I’m tucked away at Hogwarts for most of the year. That doesn’t exactly scream availability.”

“No, which is why you should date someone who is also at Hogwarts.”

Joonmyun pulls a face, nose scrunched and lip curled.

“I don’t mean a student,” Baekhyun quickly clarifies. “But there’s a certain able-bodied Quidditch Coach who would make the perfect candidate.”

Joonmyun’s heart lurches at the name, but he pushes it down. “Convenience isn’t a reason for dating.”

“Attraction is,” Baekhyun states. “Did you know your ears turn red and you nervously lick your lips whenever he’s around?” Baekhyun teases. “Attraction.”

Joonmyun sits there, refusing to argue away Baekhyun’s accusation. His silence is confirmation enough for a delighted Baekhyun. He appears very satisfied with himself as he sips his tea, the subject of Joonmyun’s personal life - or lack thereof - dropped. The silence settles in around them, a calming peace falling over the pair of them as they finish their tea. Joonmyun’s isn’t hot anymore, but it’s warm enough.

“I bet you didn’t even know it was quidditch tryouts today,” Baekhyun comments minutes later. His finger circles the rim of his cup and he dips it into his tea to flick the droplets at Joonmyun.

“Since when have I cared about quidditch?” Joonmyun answers with a sigh, wiping at the tea beaded on his hand.

“Since a tall, handsome and built new coach is going to be down there, possibly showing off some of those professional skills.” Baekhyun pauses, shivering. “I’d love to take him on a test ride.”

“Baekhyun!” Joonmyun shouts, drawing the attention of the nearby patrons. Baekhyun snickers and sits up straighter to finish his tea with a smug smile on his stupid face.

As it happens, Joonmyun finds himself a spectator in the stands during the first day of quidditch tryouts. Hufflepuff has the pitch to themselves, a number of them clustered down in the grass, wearing the standard uniform. Kris is down with them, standing tall and proud as the team captain sorts through the hopefuls. Joonmyun has a stack of homework parchment in his lap to grade, with an excuse ready just in case someone notices him.

He doesn’t give the assignments any of his attention, his fingers curled around the edges of the parchment to make sure they don’t fly away in the autumn winds. No, his attention lies with Kris and how effortlessly he pushes himself off the ground, the broom between his legs an extension of himself instead of an addition. Joonmyun had forgotten how much at home Kris was in the air and it takes his breath away watching him circle the pitch to keep an eye out on the students flying beneath him.

Kris keeps high, a small dot in the sky and Joonmyun sighs, still unable to pull his eyes away. He remembers when Kris would pull Joonmyun onto his broomstick with him, sitting Joonmyun in front of him before kicking off. Joonmyun had been a decent flyer, but it was always something special when he had Kris pressed to his back, a long arm wound around Joonmyun’s middle just in case. The two of them would spend so much time in the air, just escaping everything. He misses that.

Kris has to go into a dive, his wand out and words too low to carry on the wind when he keeps a beater hopeful who’d gotten knocked off his broom from hitting the ground. A bubble of pride expands in Joonmyun’s chest, smiling as Kris lands neatly beside the student now safely on the ground to make sure she’s unharmed. A minute later, Kris blows his whistle again and the tryouts resume.

Joonmyun’s fingers are cold, his nose starting to run from the chill in the air. He’d left his scarf back in his office, draped on the charmed coat rack that likes to try and undress Joonmyun entirely if he gets too close. Perhaps his charm had worked a little too enthusiastically. He’d stick his hands in his robes if he didn’t have to hold onto the homework. He silently curses himself because it’s either brave the weather and wake up with a cold, or miss out on the way Kris glides through the air.

Sensibility eventually wins out and Joonmyun sighs as he flexes his red fingers; they’re stiff and sore and he frowns as he stands, parchments clutched close to his chest. He doesn’t know what he was thinking coming out here on such a whim. Reliving painful memories isn’t the way to move on. He’d been an idiot to let Baekhyun’s words have any pull over his decisions.

Joonmyun is about to leave when he spies movement from the corner of his eye. He pauses, turning his head and nearly startling. Kris lands gracefully on the bleacher just below Joonmyun’s and still manages to stand taller than Joonmyun. “I didn’t think I’d see you out here,” Kris greets. His hair is windblown, his cheeks a healthy pink and Joonmyun wishes he could push his face into the warm looking scarf that’s casually draped around Kris’ neck.

“I needed the fresh air,” Joonmyun answers, using the excuse he’d come up with earlier.

“I was beginning to think you’d pulled a Professor Binns and died behind your desk, carrying on as a ghost without realizing,” Kris jests.

Joonmyun puffs out his cheeks in defiance - an old habit from when he was a kid. Kris laughs, reaching out to poke Joonmyun’s cheek until it deflates.

“I’m not that bad,” Joonmyun argues weakly.

Kris’ eyes are shining and his smile has Joonmyun’s heart beating double time. “You are. Baekhyun said you always hole yourself away at the beginning of the year, so I shouldn’t take it personally.”

Joonmyun tilts his head. “Did you think I was avoiding you?” he questions.

“A little,” Kris admits, licking over his lips. It makes them glisten and Joonmyun swallows. “This isn’t awkward for you, is it? I don’t want for this to be awkward.”

“Of course it’s not,” Joonmyun half-laughs even as anxiety wraps around his chest. “It’s not like we hated each other after . . . you know. We just lost contact.”

“I still feel bad about that,” Kris says. “I feel like I should have made more of an effort, but I was always training or practicing or traveling for games and -”

“You don’t need to feel guilty for that. We were on different paths and we knew we’d be apart,” Joonmyun explains away with a shrug.

“I could have tried more, though,” Kris says. “I missed you.”

Joonmyun feels like someone is squeezing him too tight and he knows it sounds strained when he speaks. “I missed you too.”

There’s yelling down on the pitch, breaking through the atmosphere. Kris needs to go be a coach and Joonmyun ushers him off with a small smile and a wave before turning and leaving. He feels odd, like he can’t pull in enough air and he resolutely doesn’t look back. It wouldn’t do him or his heart any good.

Joonmyun is distracted. It irks him because he’s always so dedicated to his job, to the students that anything less than his complete focus is unacceptable. He reasoned he could push away the wistful tone that had invaded Kris’ voice when he’d said he missed him, but it haunts Joonmyun. It replays itself in his head and it always pulls his thoughts away from what he should be doing.

For the third time this week, Joonmyun looks up to see that he’s allowed the staircase to move him to the wrong floor. He huffs out a sigh, lips thinning and his foot tapping in irritation. This has to stop.

The only way Joonmyun is going to finally put his feelings to rest is to talk to Kris. It’s not a conversation he’s particularly looking forward to, but he can’t keep doing this. He can’t stare at Kris during meals and wish it was him Kris was talking to. He can’t sneak down to the quidditch pitch while the teams practice just to relive his memories as Kris flies through the sky - rain or shine - like he was meant to do nothing else.

He can’t keep trying to rationalize his behavior when he knows he’s acting like a kid with a crush. Only it’s more than a crush; it’s a resurgence of affection and longing and the still burning embers of a first love that are taking residence in his heart. Every moment he has with Kris only stokes the flames and Joonmyun is turning to ash from the inside out.

What he needs is closure. They hadn’t had a proper end; they’d had an agreement for a full stop. In retrospect, it was a bad idea, but they hadn’t known that. It’s not easy to move on when there was never anything wrong with their relationship to begin with. But if he confronts Kris now, clearing the air between them, Joonmyun knows he can get over it. He has to.

A part of Joonmyun reminds him that it’s a Friday evening, which means that he has stacks of essays left in his office, waiting to be graded. But a larger part knows that he’ll spend more time than necessary trying to get through them if he doesn’t get this off his chest first. And Joonmyun isn’t one for wasting time. He’s already irritated enough that Kris’ presence has thrown off his schedule.

He knows that Kris is on detention duty tonight - something Baekhyun was sure would be of use to Joonmyun; he’d wiggled his fingers and did this up and down with his eyebrows that Joonmyun had rolled his eyes at. Honestly, Baekhyun is a teenage boy trapped in a man’s body. Joonmyun will not be thanking him for the information. He’d never hear the end of it.

Joonmyun takes a detour, hopping staircases carefully until he’s down in the staff quarters. He assumes Kris has taken up residence in Madam Hooch’s old room and that’s where he heads, nerves already set aflutter in his stomach. It’s still early; Kris will still have his hands full with the detention students, but Joonmyun knows it’s better to wait here and get it over with sooner rather than waiting. He’s always been straightforward with his intentions and feelings. This is no different even if he’s terrified that Kris is going to think of him differently after.

He waits for an hour. Joonmyun is pacing up and down the corridor in front of Kris’ door, muttering under his breath, trying to organize his thoughts. He’s in the midst of trying to come up with a word that means love without actually saying love when Kris appears, looking rather frazzled.

“Joonmyun?” he questions and Joonmyun startles. “What are you doing here?” Kris looks slightly worried, face pinched and hair out of place. Detentions can sometimes get adventurous. “Not that I don’t mind seeing you, but you only get that look on your face when you’re about to tell me something I don’t want to hear.”

“That’s not true!” Joonmyun blabs, stomping a foot to prove his point. Then he realizes the absurdity of his claim and he slumps, nose wrinkled. Kris has always known him so well. It’s so easy to keep this torch lit when Kris gives him no reason to douse it.

“If you say so,” Kris teases. He turns to his room, unlocking the door and holding it open for Joonmyun to enter.

Joonmyun hesitates only a moment before scurrying inside. If Baekhyun happened down and spotted him, he’d be insufferable for the next, well, ever. Kris’ room is cozy, comfortable. Kris has always been a lover of the softer things in life - stuffed toys and fuzzy sweaters and low lighting that helps him relax at the end of the day. Joonmyun’s mouth drops open when he sees the plush dragon that’s flying in a circle along the ceiling, skirting around the walls without ever hitting. It’s purple with spots of shimmering fabric that glint in the candlelight. It’s a little worn, but clearly taken care of.

“You still have it,” Joonmyun says in awe. He’d charmed that stuffed dragon toy for Kris during their seventh year. It had been a gift for their anniversary and Kris had adored it. Joonmyun’s throat closes at the thought of Kris keeping it for so long. “I can’t believe that charm is still going,” he adds, just to lighten the mood.

“You were always the best at charms,” Kris shrugs. “Don’t sound so surprised.” Kris is pulling off his robes, hair sticking up further and a sliver of skin flashing Joonmyun before his shirt falls back into place. “Plus, you know I’m the sentimental sort. I don’t get rid of anything with good memories attached to it.”

Joonmyun smiles weakly at that, shuffling his feet nervously. This is probably a bad idea. He shouldn’t have come down here. He’s not ready to break whatever awkward friendship there is between the two of them. Maybe he just needs more time.

“Whatever you’re trying to talk yourself out of doing, stop it,” Kris intrudes, stepping over to tip Joonmyun’s chin up. His other hand reaches out, thumb rubbing between his eyebrows to smooth the wrinkles. “You’re so stubborn. This is me, remember? You can talk to me about anything.”

“Even if it’s about you?” Joonmyun asks.

Kris doesn’t looks so confident anymore, the sides of his smile drooping a little. “Of course.” Kris takes a step back, his arms dropping to his sides. Joonmyun immediately regrets the lack of his touch. “If this is about me taking up a post here, I didn’t think it would bother you. If I had -”

“No,” Joonmyun is quick to correct. “No, it’s been great having you around again.”

Kris tilts his head to the side a little. “But?”

Joonmyun swallows down a thousand insecurities and fears, taking in a deep breath to steady himself. “But I didn’t expect to still have all these . . . feelings for you that never went away.”

Kris’ eyes narrow. “What kind of feelings?”

“The kind that have me laying in bed at night, wondering what it would be like to pick up where we left off.” Joonmyun takes a tentative step toward Kris. “I never moved on, never got over you,” he confesses. “I know it’s unfair to put this on you, but I can’t keep pretending I don’t want to press you to the nearest wall and kiss you senseless every time I see you.”

Kris closes the distance between them in one long stride, his arms wrapping around Joonmyun to pull him into a hug. Joonmyun doesn’t fight the urge to bury his face in Kris’ chest, clutching tight to him to breathe him in. He’s so warm, so comfortable and familiar even if he’s not quite as soft as he used to be. The way Kris holds him, face in Joonmyun’s hair and palms spread wide on his back, has Joonmyun aching.

“I thought I was the only one,” Kris rumbles.

Joonmyun’s heart skips a beat at that. “What?” He tips his head back enough to stare up at Kris.

“I was going to tell you that I wanted to try again, but I thought you and Baekhyun . . . “ Kris trails off and Joonmyun’s eyes widen.

“Baekhyun?!” he exclaims in horror. “You didn’t confess because of Baekhyun?”

Kris laughs, releasing Joonmyun so he can cup his face. His hands are so big and Joonmyun swallows thickly. “Let’s not talk about Baekhyun anymore,” Kris murmurs. His thumb caresses underneath Joonmyun’s lip, distracting him in the most pleasant way.

“Yeah,” Joonmyun readily agrees, hands circling Kris’ wrists. He stands on his toes, just like he’s done thousands of times, face tilting to the side instinctively.

They kiss for the first time in nearly a decade and Joonmyun could take flight from his emotions alone. Kris' mouth is just as plush and warm as ever, pushing insistently against Joonmyun's as Joonmyun makes a soft noise of encouragement. It's like coming home, tasting what he's been missing for all these years. Joonmyun slides his hands through the blond strands of Kris' hair, fingers curling until Kris lets out a pleased moan.

It's been so long. It's been too long, but Joonmyun's body responds to Kris as if there was never any time apart. Every touch sets off sparks, leaving Joonmyun breathless and still chasing for more. Kris doesn't seem to mind when Joonmyun pushes closer, standing as tall as he can on his toes while bringing Kris down further by his hair.

"Missed you," Joonmyun breathes when their mouths part.

"Less talking," Kris mumbles before he's kissing Joonmyun again.

His hands are everywhere, hot and demanding even if Joonmyun's still wearing his robes and his clothes underneath. It was too cold outside to forego the extra layers. Now he wishes he'd suffered through the cold just to have less between him and Kris.

Kris appears to be on the same wavelength, eagerly pulling at Joonmyun's robes to get them off over his head. Joonmyun's vision spins for a moment, focusing on Kris' mouth. His lips are unfairly pink, but now they're shining and puffier from Joonmyun's kisses. Heat sinks into Joonmyun's gut, bursting hot and demanding as Kris fits his palms on Joonmyun's waist.

Stuffed toys of all manner spill off the side of Kris' bed and to the floor when Kris sets Joonmyun on top of it, head cushioned on a stack of pillows. Joonmyun would laugh that Kris still has the Hufflepuff house colors on his blankets, but he's too distracted with the way Kris is climbing up between his legs. Joonmyun would be nervous, but he knows Kris and he knows this. No one's ever made him feel as comfortable in his own skin than Kris.

Joonmyun's still out of practice; it's been awhile since he's been with anyone and even if being with Kris is mostly learned behavior, neither of them are quite the same as they were when they were seventeen. The most physical proof is the hard muscle that shapes Kris' chest. Joonmyun can see how it's starting to melt off when he peels away Kris' shirt, but it's definitely there. And he can't stop touching it.

He trails downward, enjoying the noises he can pull from Kris when his nails scrape over Kris' skin. He finally gets to the waistband of Kris' jeans and his fingers pluck along the edge, teasing as Kris rolls his hips forward. Joonmyun groans, flooded with a rush of pleasure and he wants more. This he definitely remembers. Everything’s hot, feverish as Kris rocks against him and Joonmyun’s legs close around him. It’s addicting, this euphoria that flows through his veins like magic.

It’s definitely not magic that has Joonmyun letting out a deep groan when Kris slides his hands underneath the back of Joonmyun’s slacks to cup his ass, using the grip to pull his hips upward. Joonmyun scrambles to find a hold - one arm around Kris’ broad shoulders and his hand pushed against the headboard to brace himself. There’s a fire that rages through him, leaving nothing untouched and Joonmyun willingly lets it sweep him along.

“Kris,” he moans, head tipping back.

Kris uses his position to get Joonmyun’s pants down over his hips before he sits up. They both go for Kris’ jeans next, getting the button undone and zipper down. As soon as both articles, along with all the other annoying bits of fabric between them, are tossed aside, Kris fits himself between Joonmyun’s legs again - right where he belongs. Kris’ hips are still sharp, his thighs thick from constant training and Joonmyun wants to leave his mark on them, but Kris is the one with all the control right now.

Kris’ mouth is hot on Joonmyun’s neck, lips and teeth trailing down to Joonmyun’s chest, teasing over his nipples until Joonmyun is gasping, his thighs falling open further. He’s been hard since Kris laid him down, and he’s starting to throb, a fist in Kris’ hair to tug every time the tip of Joonmyun’s cock hits against Kris’ chest as he continues downward. There’s a smirk on Kris’ pink mouth, his eyes dark and hooded when he bites softly along the skin of Joonmyun’s stomach.

Joonmyun nearly laughs when Kris gets to his side. He’s ticklish there and Kris knows it. He goes to push Kris away, but he’s distracted by the fingers now wrapping around the base of his cock. Joonmyun moans, loud and uninhibited, unable to focus on anything other than how perfect Kris’ lips look wrapped around the head of his cock, torturously slow as they move down. Kris has always been so enthusiastic about sucking Joonmyun off and he’s no different this time. He’s sloppy, wetting Joonmyun’s cock thoroughly before bobbing his head up and down, pausing only to suck hard around the crown. His tongue dips into the slit and Joonmyun’s hips lift off the bed, a whine spilling from the back of his throat.

Joonmyun’s memories don’t do the actual feeling of Kris’ mouth on him any justice. His toes curl, his breathing labored and Joonmyun could come so easily from just this. But he wants more still. Somehow, he needs to feel Kris inside him, feel them connected to believe this is really happening. He’s been longing and aching and desiring for this and he won’t accept anything less than all of Kris.

It’s almost too much when he takes notice of Kris’ hand between his own legs, long fingers around his cock to jerk himself off as he sucks down Joonmyun’s cock. “Kris,” he calls, hissing when Kris’ teeth graze along the length of his cock. “Kris, need you in me.”

Kris groans, the vibrations running straight through Joonmyun’s cock before he’s pulling off with a smack of his lips. Joonmyun reaches down to pull Kris up, kissing him thoroughly. Kris tastes like him and his chin is wet and it’s so perfect. Kris rocks his hips between Joonmyun’s again and now it’s skin to skin, their bodies rubbing together without a barrier. Kris leans over, his arm off the side of the bed, while trying not to break away from Joonmyun. Joonmyun is about to ask, but then Kris is holding up his wand triumphantly.

“Accio lube!” Kris announces, flourishing his wand and Joonmyun falls back on the pillows with a laugh.

“Why don’t you keep your lube by the bed like a normal person?” Joonmyun asks even as he spreads his legs. The bottle zooms into Kris’ hand from across the room and he drops his wand back to the floor with their clothes. Joonmyun’s is down there too, forgotten for now.

Kris kisses Joonmyun quiet, which Joonmyun is content with allowing. He loops his arms around Kris’ neck, heart thundering in his chest and every nerve alive as they kiss slow and unhurried. Kris smiles at Joonmyun, fond and gummy, and it’s been so long since Joonmyun’s felt so happy. Kris bumps their noses together and Joonmyun nearly teases him for being dopey, but he stiffens, gasping, words stolen when Kris’ slick fingers slip between his legs.

Joonmyun may have spent the last few years single, but that doesn’t mean his sex drive went unsated. Still, Kris’ fingers inside him is vastly different than when he uses his own; Kris’ fingers are longer, thicker, and he’s a lot more careful than Joonmyun is with himself. The lube has a faint mango scent, which is just so Kris that Joonmyun wants to laugh.

It chokes in his throat, let out as a long groan instead. Kris stretches him open gently, even if he knows exactly how much Joonmyun can take. Joonmyun pushes down, shuddering out a deep breath as he tries to make Kris go faster. Kris leans over him, kissing him over and over, occasionally pulling his fingers out completely to stroke Joonmyun's cock a few times before slipping them inside him again.

Joonmyun is sweating, trembling, his nails leaving trails of red along Kris' back. There's a brief moment to breathe, one that Joonmyun uses to wet his dry lips before he feels the tip of Kris' cock nudging into him. Kris is slow, careful, letting his cock open Joonmyun wider as he finally slides all the way in.

Kris hikes Joonmyun's thighs up and Joonmyun locks his ankles behind Kris' back, lifting into it with practiced ease. This is something Joonmyun can do without thinking, letting the moment sink into his bones and ease the desperation that's been clawing at him. Kris has him now, completely, and Joonmyun can relax.

Kris always eases into it with slow movements and gentle touches. Joonmyun appreciates it, but more so when Kris speeds, his fingers gripping tight enough on his thighs to leave bruises. Kris' thrusts are hard enough for Joonmyun to feel the way his hips smack against his ass and he knows there will be bruises there too.

Joonmyun keeps his legs locked around Kris even when Kris dips over him to kiss him. He can't pull out as far, but he slides deeper into Joonmyun's body with every snap of his hips. It makes Joonmyun dizzy, delirious, riding on a high that he can never hope to catch. Kris leaves burning kisses over his face, along his jaw and sucks a mark into the skin of Joonmyun's neck, teeth sinking in enough to have Joonmyun going tense.

He wants this to last forever, but Joonmyun’s too far gone. He can feel it coming, rushing at that end with nothing to catch him from going over. With Kris' cock buried deep inside him and Kris there to ground him, Joonmyun comes with a moan of Kris' name. It takes him stronger than he'd anticipated and he's shaking, muscles locked and Kris thrusting through it until he stills. Joonmyun can feel him pulsing, hear the low whispers of his name that Kris leaves scattered over his skin.

"Was it always this amazing?" Kris laughs after a minute. His face is still buried in Joonmyun's neck and neither of them have moved.

"Yes," Joonmyun answers without hesitation. "It's just been so long."

"Too long," Kris sighs, leaving a kiss just beneath Joonmyun's ear. "I won't be going that long again."

Joonmyun grins at that, biting at his lower lip. Kris has sweaty hair stuck in clumps on his forehead and his face is flushed pink, and he's still everything Joonmyun's always wanted. Kris is dead weight when he drops on Joonmyun, but Joonmyun just holds him, knowing he can clean them up with a simple charm if he wants. Or, they can shuffle off to the baths together to relive Joonmyun's prefect days.

"So is this going to be a normal thing now?" Baekhyun inquires as he gestures to where Kris has a scarf wrapped around both him and Joonmyun as they stand on the quidditch pitch. The second game of the season - Hufflepuff vs Ravenclaw - is starting soon and the stands are filling with students decked out in their favorite house's colors. Even Kris, a dedicated Hufflepuff through and through, indulged Joonmyun by wearing a Ravenclaw scarf.

"Because you know he has to go out there and actually referee the match," Baekhyun finishes.

"Not yet," Joonmyun says, enjoying the feel of Kris' warm fingers threaded with his, their linked hands swinging lightly between them.

"I don't think this is the type of inter-house cooperation they're always teaching," Baekhyun quips.

Joonmyun only just refrains from taking out his wand to send a hex at his friend. "Wasn't it you who was trying to get us back together?" Joonmyun asks, exasperated.

Baekhyun has a curl to his upper lip, eyes raking over the two of them standing by him. "I only did that to see you being all awkward and fumbling around with your dumb crush. I didn't think you'd actually channel your inner Gryffindor and do something about it. You ruined the fun."

It's only been a week since Joonmyun and Kris rolled themselves out of Kris' bed and snuck through the castle halls like teenagers, enjoying the generosity of the house elves before heading to the baths. It's been an entire week of catching up, of telling Kris all about how the Ministry of Magic was all talk and no action - and smacking Kris lightheartedly on the shoulder when he'd snickered about Joonmyun always wanting action.

Kris admits that while he enjoyed quidditch, playing professionally quickly took everything fun he loved about the game and made it a chore. He didn't want to play until that love was stomped into the dirt and twisted into something he hated. So he got out while he could, deciding he'd much rather teach a new generation of potential players, show them all the reasons to love the game.

Joonmyun knows this lovey-dovey cloud that follows them everywhere is going to wear off, but he also knows that underneath it is still love and dedication and a willingness to work together. It might not be the picture perfect love, but they're going to work on it.

"I see now that the stick up Joonmyun’s ass was just a placeholder for your dick," Baekhyun huffs with a roll of his eyes. "This isn't interesting anymore." He turns and flounces off only the way Baekhyun can and Joonmyun laughs.

"Is he always . . ?" Kris inquires.

"Yes. At least until he finds someone else to torment. My galleons are on Lu Han."

"Professor Han? Divination?"

"The very same. He's been nursing a raging crush on one of the bartenders down at the Three Broomsticks - Minseok - for years now."

Kris makes a soft noise, only to be interrupted when the commentator for today's match - a Slytherin by the name of Jongdae who has more sass than Joonmyun can handle on a good day - calls everyone to attention. Kris turns to Joonmyun, leaving a warm, lingering kiss on Joonmyun's cold lips before he's unwrapping the scarf.

"Have a great game," he calls after Kris who is heading over to the two teams about to face off. Joonmyun wraps his comfy Ravenclaw scarf around his neck and glances at the stands to find himself a spot. He spies Baekhyun sitting dangerously close to Lu Han and smiles at himself. Some things never change.