The fall of an angel...
If it wasn't bad enough that my grandmother passed away...now I am currently dealing with yet another loss this year.
The kids were sleeping on the livingroom floor, so Brian and I went an got ready to go to sleep cause we have to drive up to my grandmother's trailer with my grandpa, to help my mother cope with my grandmother's passing. Well....it seems David and Aiden snuck out of the house....as I started to fall asleep I heard David run in and yell "Aiden's in the water!" Brian and I jumped out of bed and ran out to the backyard. Sure enough...my poor baby was in the pool. Brian jumped in and pulled him out, he gasped for air and I began CPR, nothing but, a few gasps, vomit and water came from my poor baby as I tried to clean his airway. Then the renters ran up after calling 911 and took over CPR as Danette is mroe trained than I am...the ambulance came, took my baby and some information. I shortly joined them there. They did everything they could to revive my baby....I stood there in horror as I watched them shoot medication after medication into my little Aiden. All I could do was repeat "breathe, please breathe Aiden..." The had continued CPR as well, trying their damndest to bring my angel back to me. After I had been there for a good 30 minutes...there was no response from my angel. They told me any further attempts fer futile...and ceased their attempts. They cleaned him up, sat me in a chair and for the next hour and a half I sat there...holding then lifeless body of my beautiful 2 year old....all I could do was stroke his hair, kiss his forehead and tell him I loved him and that I was sorry I wasn't able to save him...and that my recently deceased grandmother, my grandfather who passed away in 1993, and my recently deceased step father would take good care of him now, as his mommy had done when he still breathed...
I have yet to tell my mother...I will tell her when I see her today...I don't know what to do..Brian is here and will be for a few days at least...then he has to go back to work...they took David and Spencer into protective custody for a few days, as I am not mentally capable right now of even caring for myself let alone my other two precious angels...right now I need to finish getting dressed and dry the endless tears...almost time to get my grandfather...and then explain it all to him...
IF YOU TELL ME TO PUT THIS IMAGE BEHIND A CUT, I'LL DO NOTHING BUT TELL YOU TO FUCK THE HELL OFF!!!!! I REFUSE TO PUT IT BEHIND A CUT SO DON'T EVEN PONDER ASKING!
My beloved angel Aiden, may you rest safely in the arms of the angels that now guard you...
UPDATE: I have read the coroner's report. Ainde did NOT drown. He was remotely alright until they got him into the e.r. After everything was over that night, they explained to me that they couldn't get the tube down his throat to pump more oxygen into him because his airway was still blocked by vomit. HE ASPIRATED NOT DROWNED!!!! THE NEWSPAPER IS WRONG! They will be sued for slander and emotional distress, not by me, but by my mother and the California National Guard and JAG office. Anyone who feels the need to continue to bash me and cause me more grief by posting nasty little lies about me, do so if you must, but keep in mind your IP number is being logged and you will be sued for slander by the same people who are now suing the newspaper. This is not a threat but a promise...continue to cause me more grief by commenting on my ways of raising my children when you don't know what you're talking about, and you WILL indeed be sued.
I will tollerate no more of this. Had that rat bastard built the fence around the pool 3 weeks ago that he was already paid for....my angel would still be here today. Yes I do blame the man for it. He was paid, he measured the backyard, and never came back. My mom searched every damn day for that bastard. If he doesn't have that damn fence built by the time my mother gets back from my nana's trailer....he's being sued as well for the wrongful death of my precious angel.
Many thanks to all who have left kind words, and who are currently aiding me in my grief. If it weren't for you...I wouldn't know what to do. For that I thank you all. I especially want to thank...
Brian for being here with me through it all, and pulling our baby from that pool.
Ger for being a crutch so to speak, and for all his kind words and prayers.
My brothers Mike and Randal for his love, support and ability to keep me together when I am falling apart.
My mother for her love and support.
My grandfather for his love and support.
The Atascadero National Guard for all their love, support and for raising the funds to help pay for the expenses for the services for my Nana and my angel. In return I will continue to donate my time and 50% or more of the proceeds from my jewelry and cloak sales.
The North County Humane Society for giving me a chance at a new start with my babies, and for their love and support in these dark times.
Elle for the kind words she left for me in the comments (which I have disabled because this post is in rememberance of my angel, not for those who know nothing about it to bash his mother.)
Mellie for the kid words and prayers.
EarthRain for the kid words and support.
Lindsey for her kind words, love and support.
Dan for his prayers, love and support.
Mindy for her love and support.
kaorinishidake for the love, prayers and support.
SnotBag for her love and support.
Leeeezaaaard for her love and support.
Childe my Guardian Angel....for the love and support over the years.
The kids were sleeping on the livingroom floor, so Brian and I went an got ready to go to sleep cause we have to drive up to my grandmother's trailer with my grandpa, to help my mother cope with my grandmother's passing. Well....it seems David and Aiden snuck out of the house....as I started to fall asleep I heard David run in and yell "Aiden's in the water!" Brian and I jumped out of bed and ran out to the backyard. Sure enough...my poor baby was in the pool. Brian jumped in and pulled him out, he gasped for air and I began CPR, nothing but, a few gasps, vomit and water came from my poor baby as I tried to clean his airway. Then the renters ran up after calling 911 and took over CPR as Danette is mroe trained than I am...the ambulance came, took my baby and some information. I shortly joined them there. They did everything they could to revive my baby....I stood there in horror as I watched them shoot medication after medication into my little Aiden. All I could do was repeat "breathe, please breathe Aiden..." The had continued CPR as well, trying their damndest to bring my angel back to me. After I had been there for a good 30 minutes...there was no response from my angel. They told me any further attempts fer futile...and ceased their attempts. They cleaned him up, sat me in a chair and for the next hour and a half I sat there...holding then lifeless body of my beautiful 2 year old....all I could do was stroke his hair, kiss his forehead and tell him I loved him and that I was sorry I wasn't able to save him...and that my recently deceased grandmother, my grandfather who passed away in 1993, and my recently deceased step father would take good care of him now, as his mommy had done when he still breathed...
I have yet to tell my mother...I will tell her when I see her today...I don't know what to do..Brian is here and will be for a few days at least...then he has to go back to work...they took David and Spencer into protective custody for a few days, as I am not mentally capable right now of even caring for myself let alone my other two precious angels...right now I need to finish getting dressed and dry the endless tears...almost time to get my grandfather...and then explain it all to him...
IF YOU TELL ME TO PUT THIS IMAGE BEHIND A CUT, I'LL DO NOTHING BUT TELL YOU TO FUCK THE HELL OFF!!!!! I REFUSE TO PUT IT BEHIND A CUT SO DON'T EVEN PONDER ASKING!
My beloved angel Aiden, may you rest safely in the arms of the angels that now guard you...
UPDATE: I have read the coroner's report. Ainde did NOT drown. He was remotely alright until they got him into the e.r. After everything was over that night, they explained to me that they couldn't get the tube down his throat to pump more oxygen into him because his airway was still blocked by vomit. HE ASPIRATED NOT DROWNED!!!! THE NEWSPAPER IS WRONG! They will be sued for slander and emotional distress, not by me, but by my mother and the California National Guard and JAG office. Anyone who feels the need to continue to bash me and cause me more grief by posting nasty little lies about me, do so if you must, but keep in mind your IP number is being logged and you will be sued for slander by the same people who are now suing the newspaper. This is not a threat but a promise...continue to cause me more grief by commenting on my ways of raising my children when you don't know what you're talking about, and you WILL indeed be sued.
I will tollerate no more of this. Had that rat bastard built the fence around the pool 3 weeks ago that he was already paid for....my angel would still be here today. Yes I do blame the man for it. He was paid, he measured the backyard, and never came back. My mom searched every damn day for that bastard. If he doesn't have that damn fence built by the time my mother gets back from my nana's trailer....he's being sued as well for the wrongful death of my precious angel.
Many thanks to all who have left kind words, and who are currently aiding me in my grief. If it weren't for you...I wouldn't know what to do. For that I thank you all. I especially want to thank...
Brian for being here with me through it all, and pulling our baby from that pool.
Ger for being a crutch so to speak, and for all his kind words and prayers.
My brothers Mike and Randal for his love, support and ability to keep me together when I am falling apart.
My mother for her love and support.
My grandfather for his love and support.
The Atascadero National Guard for all their love, support and for raising the funds to help pay for the expenses for the services for my Nana and my angel. In return I will continue to donate my time and 50% or more of the proceeds from my jewelry and cloak sales.
The North County Humane Society for giving me a chance at a new start with my babies, and for their love and support in these dark times.
Elle for the kind words she left for me in the comments (which I have disabled because this post is in rememberance of my angel, not for those who know nothing about it to bash his mother.)
Mellie for the kid words and prayers.
EarthRain for the kid words and support.
Lindsey for her kind words, love and support.
Dan for his prayers, love and support.
Mindy for her love and support.
kaorinishidake for the love, prayers and support.
SnotBag for her love and support.
Leeeezaaaard for her love and support.
Childe my Guardian Angel....for the love and support over the years.