i am bored and going through absolute nostalgia
this year has been so...
this is a fuckload of pictures, oh well.
I just went through my photobucket. This year (since last summer) has been so awfulamazing
there was thailand
and there was going to a new school and meeting new people
i wish i had a picture of jenna and joe and so many other people i met this year.
keeping my old friends and taking my little sister EVERYWHERE
gaining confidence enough to put my picture up
alye
creation of ligers
im switching schools again next year. Three schools, three years. Ill be attending santa barbara high next year.
I really dont want to go. for the first time i feel in place. I dont feel out of place, or like a loner, or any of that anymore. I have found my friends, finally, and know exactly who i love. And i hate the feeling that it took me 16 years to find friends, and i can only keep the feeling for two more months or so. I dont want to leave the relationships i have just built, i dont want to leave the stability i have just found.
Although everyone in our little tight group is going seperate ways at the moment, and although i am constantly under surveilance and never alowed to leave my house hold, i still feel so much comfort knowing that everyone is so close.
i hate pali, i loooathe pali, but some of the people i met at pali are the most beautiful people on the planet. Id be a homicidal bipolar maniac without the people i met this year.
And the people who i loved from last year.
And the people i will always love all my life, even though it was bittersweet.
So basically i feel like being very emo, the last week was...well...the best way to describe it was...fuck, nevermind. It was just ridiculously awful and intense.
Life is too fucking short, and peoples priorities are so farfetched.
anyway, ill stop being cliche now.
to add to my emo-ness, ive been listening to blink. Adam's song to be precise, because a very knowledgable guy once told me a story that directly related to that song. And although it doesnt make the song itself any better, i associate it with certain things and stories and people. Therefore ive been listening to it alot.
Im sick of music pretension, because who is to judge what music is good or bad. It all acts as some means of escape, how can one escape route be better then another? as long as we all get out of what ever situation we are trying to transcend or take our minds off of at the time.
I always felt that a good or atleast similar music taste to mine was a turn on, or almost a necessity in many relationships. I guess i felt that who ever listens to what i listen to, well, i felt that at one point we would feel the same exact emotions. That since we listened to the same song the emotions we felt during the song were the same, thus creating some weird connection or something. Creating discussion topics, and sparking existentialism conversation because we listened to the same music, the same base, the same sound, the same thoughts etc.
i realize that is complete bullshit.
today i was genuinely happy.
this is a fuckload of pictures, oh well.
I just went through my photobucket. This year (since last summer) has been so awfulamazing
there was thailand
and there was going to a new school and meeting new people
i wish i had a picture of jenna and joe and so many other people i met this year.
keeping my old friends and taking my little sister EVERYWHERE
gaining confidence enough to put my picture up
alye
creation of ligers
im switching schools again next year. Three schools, three years. Ill be attending santa barbara high next year.
I really dont want to go. for the first time i feel in place. I dont feel out of place, or like a loner, or any of that anymore. I have found my friends, finally, and know exactly who i love. And i hate the feeling that it took me 16 years to find friends, and i can only keep the feeling for two more months or so. I dont want to leave the relationships i have just built, i dont want to leave the stability i have just found.
Although everyone in our little tight group is going seperate ways at the moment, and although i am constantly under surveilance and never alowed to leave my house hold, i still feel so much comfort knowing that everyone is so close.
i hate pali, i loooathe pali, but some of the people i met at pali are the most beautiful people on the planet. Id be a homicidal bipolar maniac without the people i met this year.
And the people who i loved from last year.
And the people i will always love all my life, even though it was bittersweet.
So basically i feel like being very emo, the last week was...well...the best way to describe it was...fuck, nevermind. It was just ridiculously awful and intense.
Life is too fucking short, and peoples priorities are so farfetched.
anyway, ill stop being cliche now.
to add to my emo-ness, ive been listening to blink. Adam's song to be precise, because a very knowledgable guy once told me a story that directly related to that song. And although it doesnt make the song itself any better, i associate it with certain things and stories and people. Therefore ive been listening to it alot.
Im sick of music pretension, because who is to judge what music is good or bad. It all acts as some means of escape, how can one escape route be better then another? as long as we all get out of what ever situation we are trying to transcend or take our minds off of at the time.
I always felt that a good or atleast similar music taste to mine was a turn on, or almost a necessity in many relationships. I guess i felt that who ever listens to what i listen to, well, i felt that at one point we would feel the same exact emotions. That since we listened to the same song the emotions we felt during the song were the same, thus creating some weird connection or something. Creating discussion topics, and sparking existentialism conversation because we listened to the same music, the same base, the same sound, the same thoughts etc.
i realize that is complete bullshit.
today i was genuinely happy.