What is going on?
Through out my life I have learned one simple rule. The fall has a larger impact then the climb. Anytime I seem to get things going, and am happy with mylife, I have a day like today. It is really getting tough to pick myself up time and time again. And what is worse, days like today, just end up making me think...and we all know that is not a good thing.
The major question is....yes I left for a really shitty reason...but what did I come back to? I thought it was because this is where I belong, here I was doing all sorts of bowling, was doing LWF and had great friends. Now that Im back, yes Im back to bowling but with a different team....LWF is going to shit fast, and Im finding myself more frustrated then enjoying it...and friends? what are they? Other then the one or two times I see some, the only people i have hung out with is the Stooges. But even tho I know that I had basically lost everybody I was close to, I had gotten myself in a happy state...and was enjoying life. A good friend of mine from Australia is planning on visiting sometime after June. And I was getting close to an old friend who had been going thru some tough times, big problem was, I started falling for her.
Now for the fall....I decide Im going to tell her how I feel....so I call her up...and she is at her ex/new boyfriends house, as they have gotten back together...awkward. So, of course, i dont tell her. And I tell my friend from Australia that I was worried about some of her life choices lately, cause she has been looking pretty run down...and she took it in a different way then I was trying to say. And now isnt talking to me.
So here I am, back in a town that I thought I belonged in....confused and alone.
And people wonder why I didnt try to change things before. Cause when I do...it all falls to shit. And the fall has a larger impact then the climb.
The major question is....yes I left for a really shitty reason...but what did I come back to? I thought it was because this is where I belong, here I was doing all sorts of bowling, was doing LWF and had great friends. Now that Im back, yes Im back to bowling but with a different team....LWF is going to shit fast, and Im finding myself more frustrated then enjoying it...and friends? what are they? Other then the one or two times I see some, the only people i have hung out with is the Stooges. But even tho I know that I had basically lost everybody I was close to, I had gotten myself in a happy state...and was enjoying life. A good friend of mine from Australia is planning on visiting sometime after June. And I was getting close to an old friend who had been going thru some tough times, big problem was, I started falling for her.
Now for the fall....I decide Im going to tell her how I feel....so I call her up...and she is at her ex/new boyfriends house, as they have gotten back together...awkward. So, of course, i dont tell her. And I tell my friend from Australia that I was worried about some of her life choices lately, cause she has been looking pretty run down...and she took it in a different way then I was trying to say. And now isnt talking to me.
So here I am, back in a town that I thought I belonged in....confused and alone.
And people wonder why I didnt try to change things before. Cause when I do...it all falls to shit. And the fall has a larger impact then the climb.