The music plays and everyone must dance.
Startings is never where I like to begin because.. really where do you begin? There's so many power hungry thoughts vying for attention that regardless of importance or priority they've become the faded democracy of nothing . No one can agree. A standstill. No progress. Nothing. So you stare at me with disbelief when I have nothing to say. There's just too much to say and I feel like I'd be stealing if I told you one and not the other so nothing it is. I mean I'm happy... most of the time. I think? I'm not bipolar or anything I just kinda have me and how I am and emotions are just these little practical jokes I play on people and when I get bored I pick a random emotion and a random person and it gives me something to do I guess. Lets be mad at this person... so I have something to distract me from things I have a reason to be mad about. Lets love this person so I don't have to think about this "lonliness" I keep hearing about. I mean I just don't care about things. There's a few things I can't help but care about. There's a few things I think I care about... till they stop making me happy or they leave and I don't realize their gone till I need them for something or their name flashes on my caller ID. Like I have all these great ideas but nothing that makes decisions so I live on a whim. I don't know what I'm trying to explain here. Or Why... but... where was I... oh yea. I love myself. I really do... I think I'm gonna do great things for the world. But if I don't... I don't really care. The worse that can happen is I'll die. *glances at the clock* Sorry I got sidetracked. Me, my brother and a bottle of gin had a little talk about life, love and how it's all bullshit and whether i'm playing with barbies or having an orgy as long as i'm happy throughout... then it's time well spent. I'll raise my glass to that. You know I'm so discontent being so content all the time. It doesn't matter whether you threw $20 at me or spit in my face I'd prolly still sit there with the same dumbass grin on. Where the hell was I going with this entry... I think I just wanted to update... cause it's been awhile. I've been working a lot, I'm sick, I got bit by a dog, I moved... man I got sidetracked again. Was a good distraction though hehe. Sorry to everyone if I havn't been online much, my computer is still here in St.Pete. I'm a beautiful mess and I'm accepting donations... food, money, time, a dresser, paint, band-aids, clothes, love... ya know... the neccesseties. Oh yea... I need conditioner too. Alright I started this entry at 7pm and it's now 2am and it prolly doesn't make any sense but I never promised ya an answer to the question.
Don't worry... I'll write something poetic as soon as I get some inspiration.... donations?
Save me from all the trouble and the pain. I know I’m weak, but I can’t face that girl again. Tell her the reasons why I can’t remain, perhaps she’ll understand if you tell it to her plain. And if she asks you why, you can tell her that I told you that I'm tired of castles in the air. I've got a dream I want the world to share and castle walls just lead me to despair.
Don't worry... I'll write something poetic as soon as I get some inspiration.... donations?
Save me from all the trouble and the pain. I know I’m weak, but I can’t face that girl again. Tell her the reasons why I can’t remain, perhaps she’ll understand if you tell it to her plain. And if she asks you why, you can tell her that I told you that I'm tired of castles in the air. I've got a dream I want the world to share and castle walls just lead me to despair.