(no subject)
I'm starting to lose feeling in my legs. Walking without falling down is difficult. The pain has gotten to the point that I cannot go a day without taking at least three doses of Endocet. I'm trying to remain hopeful that I may someday recover, but it is getting hard. Every treatment I've ever tried has failed, which doesn't exactly inspire confidence in my current treatment.
My life is a testament to the fact that life is sometimes indiscriminantly and arbitrarily cruel. Living happily ever after is a myth. Not everyone gets to live out a full lifespan, and those who do should consider themselves lucky. The saddest part is that if I'd gone to the doctor immediately after I found out about the mole on my back, I might not be in this situation. Procrastination really will be the end of me. Oh well, no point in dwelling on what could have been.
The greatest joy of my life has always been making people laugh. Every time someone laughs at one of my jokes it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. Humor is a potent force, which can be used as a weapon, and as a shield. So if you've ever laughed at anything I've said, thanks. It means a lot to me.
My biggest fear is that my life has been too short to have an impact on the world. I've made no great contributions to society. I have no children. When I die, the only permanent thing I will have contributed to the earth is my tombstone. I feel cheated of what I could have accomplished if given a full life span. I fear that in ten years no one will remember my passing.
I hope that my country recovers from the tail spin it is currently heading in. It gives me no joy to see the U.S. moving closer and closer to a theocracy. The U.S. is currently heading down a path that I think will lead to its ruin. This country was founded on a wonderful set of ideals, and it pains me to see it unravel like this. I think the worst thing about 9/11 was not the 3000 or so people killed, but rather the effect it had on our country.
I don't know if there is an afterlife. I'd like to think there is, though. It's a bit disconcerting to think that everything just ends when you die. I'm conceited enough that I think that I'd go to heaven if there was one. I once had a nightmare that the Fundamentalist Christians had it right about everything. It was almost enough to convert me. Then I remembered that I fundamentally disagree with everything they stand for.
My life is a testament to the fact that life is sometimes indiscriminantly and arbitrarily cruel. Living happily ever after is a myth. Not everyone gets to live out a full lifespan, and those who do should consider themselves lucky. The saddest part is that if I'd gone to the doctor immediately after I found out about the mole on my back, I might not be in this situation. Procrastination really will be the end of me. Oh well, no point in dwelling on what could have been.
The greatest joy of my life has always been making people laugh. Every time someone laughs at one of my jokes it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. Humor is a potent force, which can be used as a weapon, and as a shield. So if you've ever laughed at anything I've said, thanks. It means a lot to me.
My biggest fear is that my life has been too short to have an impact on the world. I've made no great contributions to society. I have no children. When I die, the only permanent thing I will have contributed to the earth is my tombstone. I feel cheated of what I could have accomplished if given a full life span. I fear that in ten years no one will remember my passing.
I hope that my country recovers from the tail spin it is currently heading in. It gives me no joy to see the U.S. moving closer and closer to a theocracy. The U.S. is currently heading down a path that I think will lead to its ruin. This country was founded on a wonderful set of ideals, and it pains me to see it unravel like this. I think the worst thing about 9/11 was not the 3000 or so people killed, but rather the effect it had on our country.
I don't know if there is an afterlife. I'd like to think there is, though. It's a bit disconcerting to think that everything just ends when you die. I'm conceited enough that I think that I'd go to heaven if there was one. I once had a nightmare that the Fundamentalist Christians had it right about everything. It was almost enough to convert me. Then I remembered that I fundamentally disagree with everything they stand for.