I am fuming and silently screaming..
You know what I just realized? Talking about sexism and other things that make me feel "unwanted, worthless, second class, not worth an iota of existence" with men in general has got to be one of the most trying experiences I've ever been through.
Take the instance of tonight, with my supposed true friend, who is male. I understand I may have come out of the blue but I'm really tired of being told that I should just "ignore things" or that it's "pointless" to get upset at these things. Which I understand in part, you gotta step away sometimes to avoid getting pulled into that toxic mess. But I get really pissed off when he pretty much blanket statements to ignore this stuff. Like I can press a shinny button in my head where it won't effect me.
He says it's "detached" as is, on the internet. Bullshit. Sexism - along with a lot of other shit that pisses me off but is not the point of this post - is everywhere. Let me list the places it is:
a) on the television
b) in books
c) in magazines
d) advertising
e) at home
f) at school
g) from all genders
h) from all sexualities
and so on and so forth
And am I supposed to what? Ignore the whole damn world? I can't get away from it all the time and you know, not saying anything about it isn't going to make it go away. No. That's called silencing me. So while I get his concern - mostly about me pissing off the wrong person - stop patronizing me and in a way, silencing me too. Because all he'd do when I mentioned this? Is go "nevermind". Is it so damned wrong to not want to have to sit there and put up with shit against your very existence?
And then the part that pissed me the F right off. He just had to go and say "bet 'em up sure, but no killing" AS IF I AM A FUCKING MURDERER. He wouldn't admit it was even a joke. I mean. Really. Wouldn't even say "just joking you know, I know you'd never kill anyone" because apparently he doesn't think I'd kill anyone he's just "covering his bases". WTF? That's a nice way of being vague and implying "well, you know, if you got angry enough you would kill someone but I don't want you getting hysterical at me so I'll say this all vague like, yeah". You know, lots of people can get very angry and never kill someone. It happens all the time. Really it does.
So when I ask you to please stop telling me "no killing" as it sounds accusing, judgmental and patronizing as fuck? DO IT. FUCKING DO IT ALREADY.
Because next time you bring it up I will blow a fucking gasket at you and then ignore you for a damn week. GET THE PICTURE.
Take the instance of tonight, with my supposed true friend, who is male. I understand I may have come out of the blue but I'm really tired of being told that I should just "ignore things" or that it's "pointless" to get upset at these things. Which I understand in part, you gotta step away sometimes to avoid getting pulled into that toxic mess. But I get really pissed off when he pretty much blanket statements to ignore this stuff. Like I can press a shinny button in my head where it won't effect me.
He says it's "detached" as is, on the internet. Bullshit. Sexism - along with a lot of other shit that pisses me off but is not the point of this post - is everywhere. Let me list the places it is:
a) on the television
b) in books
c) in magazines
d) advertising
e) at home
f) at school
g) from all genders
h) from all sexualities
and so on and so forth
And am I supposed to what? Ignore the whole damn world? I can't get away from it all the time and you know, not saying anything about it isn't going to make it go away. No. That's called silencing me. So while I get his concern - mostly about me pissing off the wrong person - stop patronizing me and in a way, silencing me too. Because all he'd do when I mentioned this? Is go "nevermind". Is it so damned wrong to not want to have to sit there and put up with shit against your very existence?
And then the part that pissed me the F right off. He just had to go and say "bet 'em up sure, but no killing" AS IF I AM A FUCKING MURDERER. He wouldn't admit it was even a joke. I mean. Really. Wouldn't even say "just joking you know, I know you'd never kill anyone" because apparently he doesn't think I'd kill anyone he's just "covering his bases". WTF? That's a nice way of being vague and implying "well, you know, if you got angry enough you would kill someone but I don't want you getting hysterical at me so I'll say this all vague like, yeah". You know, lots of people can get very angry and never kill someone. It happens all the time. Really it does.
So when I ask you to please stop telling me "no killing" as it sounds accusing, judgmental and patronizing as fuck? DO IT. FUCKING DO IT ALREADY.
Because next time you bring it up I will blow a fucking gasket at you and then ignore you for a damn week. GET THE PICTURE.