Installing a keylogger is a serious breech of privacy for anyone, including and especially intimate partners. I would be furious.
If there is suspicion of wrongdoing then the solution is not creepy control tactics but approaching the person, discussing the problem, and counseling. Looking for a "gotcha" is not helpful and is signs of serious trust issues that are pretty much grounds for breakup/divorce, really. If my partner installed a keylogger without my knowledge and I found out about it, I would immediately suggest we separate and go to counseling. But that's just me. The bulk of my communication is online, and to think that my partner would be doggedly monitoring every word looking for some suspicious activity is just too creepy and scary for words. It shows a total absence of trust and a need for total control.
My husband and I know each other's passwords just because we've had to ask each other to log into email to check something or whatever, but we would never log into each other's private email to snoop. There is no reason for it. If I suspected anything, I would talk to him first and get counseling. Fortunately, that is not an issue for us. And my husband is kind of a luddite, so I doubt I have to worry about things like keyloggers in any case. :)
I would also like to add that I think it's necessary and good for spouses/partners to have private parts of their lives that their partners/spouses are not privy to. Not like hoarding secrets, but just having one's own space and one's own life. It's healthy. Which is why invasion of that is so wrong - it's claiming ownership over someone else's autonomous space.
If you are worried, ask questions. If you don't believe the answers, then leave, get counseling, or both.
If there is suspicion of wrongdoing then the solution is not creepy control tactics but approaching the person, discussing the problem, and counseling. Looking for a "gotcha" is not helpful and is signs of serious trust issues that are pretty much grounds for breakup/divorce, really. If my partner installed a keylogger without my knowledge and I found out about it, I would immediately suggest we separate and go to counseling. But that's just me. The bulk of my communication is online, and to think that my partner would be doggedly monitoring every word looking for some suspicious activity is just too creepy and scary for words. It shows a total absence of trust and a need for total control.
My husband and I know each other's passwords just because we've had to ask each other to log into email to check something or whatever, but we would never log into each other's private email to snoop. There is no reason for it. If I suspected anything, I would talk to him first and get counseling. Fortunately, that is not an issue for us. And my husband is kind of a luddite, so I doubt I have to worry about things like keyloggers in any case. :)
Reply
If you are worried, ask questions. If you don't believe the answers, then leave, get counseling, or both.
Reply
Leave a comment