where in the hell is arthur dent?
so much to say, so sorry to stay away. past couple of nights, i've longer to touch base with myself on paper. this counts more to me these days, for reasons previously specified. so let's try a check in, shall we?
summer is shaping up to kick some ass. going to take my sister's trailer across the country, oddly enough without my sister. ruvi and i for two weeks, then mike and i for 2.5 weeks. gonna be a lot of fun. we're going to hit yellowstone and mt rushmore on the way out and then go through canada on the way back. kick ass. a couple of festivals along the way, which will be nice breaks. sis is even coming to one - the big one in tennessee, which makes it kick even more ass. love the sis in those environs - away from the hustle and bustle of her kids, her life.
spring doesn't suck either, i must say. the weather has kicked some ass as of late, and thank god the decider decided that we needed more light later earlier this year. (i laugh at that last sentence. congrats if you get what i'm trying to say there). i've been pretty busy as of late, but i suppose that's what you gotta expect when you teach overload and have a second job. i'm not complaining, however, and i doubt that you'll find me doing so anytime in the near future. kick me if i do, because i love my job. and my other job is pretty cool too.
mike is destroying the house and rebuilding it, pipe by pipe. i guess if you buy the engineer the home....
and then there's my friend, let's call her jayne. jayne is getting married, and i'm blessed to be in her wedding. well, jayne has been through some stuff as of late, and not small stuff either, and now she's being,...well, she's being rather bridezilla. i won't go into detail, because that may just get petty. but, it's rather annoying and i want to both 1) be understanding of the stresses that are affecting her at this time and 2) tell her to go to hell and stop being so full of unrealistic expectations. quite the pickle, wouldn't you say?? yes, well, i agree, and the only thing i know is that i need to let it sit for a couple of days, or else i'll end up telling her how i really feel, and that's probably a bit too honestly brutal right now.
honestly, though, can i just say this to everyone that i know, without sounding like a pretentious bitch?: i know what i'm talking about. while i have a lot to say sometimes and may take a while to get to the fucking point, i don't talk shit out my ass and i only talk about what i know something about, 99% of the time from experience.
and just so you know, i give that same respect to you. when you speak to me about something, i have faith that you are speaking from your experience and not as though you knew something about nothing you'd ever had some type of contact with. i always try to understand the perspective that you are coming from, so that i can really get what you are trying to say. i want to hear from you, i want to learn from you. i would hope that you were honest with me, and that i was open enough to hear the truth, whatever it may be.
anyway....
otherwise, i miss people a bit. i've tried to keep in touch with the peeps as the semester continues, and i've succeeded on some accounts, i've failed on others. overall, not too bad, i guess. i do find that the mental energy i experience changes so much from month to month, season to season, beginning to middle to end of semsester. i can't believe that it's the middle of march, 2007. what the fuck - where DOES the time go?
i strikes me occasionally that I'll be 32 this year, and my baby clock is ticking. i'm not so sure that i'm ready to have a baby. i felt more ready a couple of months ago. i've reverted to being freaked out again. about pregnancy and about actually having a kid. guess enough of my friends have had babies that the reality is closer than ever before, even though i was a major contributor to the raising of my niece, who is now 6. i know, from first hand experience, about how radically my life will change as a result of procreating. and while i'm not necessarily clinging to the lifestyle that i currently lead, i think i'm feeling a bit intimidated by the permanance of the change that a baby presents. i know, i know, the joy far outweighs the pain, perhaps i'm just feeling fat.
that was a joke, btw. i'm sure it comes across much better in person.
otherwise, i do feel a bit like i'm coming out of a funk. a funk that has lasted a long long time. like since when my dad was sick, 4 years ago. i have had my ups and downs in that time, but i think that i'm finally seeing and dealing with my life in a different way as of late. i suppose that if i had gone to a doctor, i could have managed my way into a diagnosis of depression and gotten medicated, but i don't see in black and white and i think my imbalance was naturally induced, so should be naturally counterbalanced. i see that finally happening, where my life is settling down, but in such a good way. in a calming way. in a positive way. in a happy way. there is nothing major that i can complain about, and so many things to be thankful for. and i think that attitude really does follow me though my days and through the things that i do. i feel that from my core, and it's an invigorating feeling.
so, i guess that's the status update for now. i don't know if it made any sense, but the daily show is on, so editting is not an option.
summer is shaping up to kick some ass. going to take my sister's trailer across the country, oddly enough without my sister. ruvi and i for two weeks, then mike and i for 2.5 weeks. gonna be a lot of fun. we're going to hit yellowstone and mt rushmore on the way out and then go through canada on the way back. kick ass. a couple of festivals along the way, which will be nice breaks. sis is even coming to one - the big one in tennessee, which makes it kick even more ass. love the sis in those environs - away from the hustle and bustle of her kids, her life.
spring doesn't suck either, i must say. the weather has kicked some ass as of late, and thank god the decider decided that we needed more light later earlier this year. (i laugh at that last sentence. congrats if you get what i'm trying to say there). i've been pretty busy as of late, but i suppose that's what you gotta expect when you teach overload and have a second job. i'm not complaining, however, and i doubt that you'll find me doing so anytime in the near future. kick me if i do, because i love my job. and my other job is pretty cool too.
mike is destroying the house and rebuilding it, pipe by pipe. i guess if you buy the engineer the home....
and then there's my friend, let's call her jayne. jayne is getting married, and i'm blessed to be in her wedding. well, jayne has been through some stuff as of late, and not small stuff either, and now she's being,...well, she's being rather bridezilla. i won't go into detail, because that may just get petty. but, it's rather annoying and i want to both 1) be understanding of the stresses that are affecting her at this time and 2) tell her to go to hell and stop being so full of unrealistic expectations. quite the pickle, wouldn't you say?? yes, well, i agree, and the only thing i know is that i need to let it sit for a couple of days, or else i'll end up telling her how i really feel, and that's probably a bit too honestly brutal right now.
honestly, though, can i just say this to everyone that i know, without sounding like a pretentious bitch?: i know what i'm talking about. while i have a lot to say sometimes and may take a while to get to the fucking point, i don't talk shit out my ass and i only talk about what i know something about, 99% of the time from experience.
and just so you know, i give that same respect to you. when you speak to me about something, i have faith that you are speaking from your experience and not as though you knew something about nothing you'd ever had some type of contact with. i always try to understand the perspective that you are coming from, so that i can really get what you are trying to say. i want to hear from you, i want to learn from you. i would hope that you were honest with me, and that i was open enough to hear the truth, whatever it may be.
anyway....
otherwise, i miss people a bit. i've tried to keep in touch with the peeps as the semester continues, and i've succeeded on some accounts, i've failed on others. overall, not too bad, i guess. i do find that the mental energy i experience changes so much from month to month, season to season, beginning to middle to end of semsester. i can't believe that it's the middle of march, 2007. what the fuck - where DOES the time go?
i strikes me occasionally that I'll be 32 this year, and my baby clock is ticking. i'm not so sure that i'm ready to have a baby. i felt more ready a couple of months ago. i've reverted to being freaked out again. about pregnancy and about actually having a kid. guess enough of my friends have had babies that the reality is closer than ever before, even though i was a major contributor to the raising of my niece, who is now 6. i know, from first hand experience, about how radically my life will change as a result of procreating. and while i'm not necessarily clinging to the lifestyle that i currently lead, i think i'm feeling a bit intimidated by the permanance of the change that a baby presents. i know, i know, the joy far outweighs the pain, perhaps i'm just feeling fat.
that was a joke, btw. i'm sure it comes across much better in person.
otherwise, i do feel a bit like i'm coming out of a funk. a funk that has lasted a long long time. like since when my dad was sick, 4 years ago. i have had my ups and downs in that time, but i think that i'm finally seeing and dealing with my life in a different way as of late. i suppose that if i had gone to a doctor, i could have managed my way into a diagnosis of depression and gotten medicated, but i don't see in black and white and i think my imbalance was naturally induced, so should be naturally counterbalanced. i see that finally happening, where my life is settling down, but in such a good way. in a calming way. in a positive way. in a happy way. there is nothing major that i can complain about, and so many things to be thankful for. and i think that attitude really does follow me though my days and through the things that i do. i feel that from my core, and it's an invigorating feeling.
so, i guess that's the status update for now. i don't know if it made any sense, but the daily show is on, so editting is not an option.