9th Sending [Commentlog] Backdated 10/12

[thequeensown]

[Talia has been keeping herself busy with weapons training of late, practicing with both the blades she received from Kevas and her own throwing knives. She was talented enough with the weapons, but she was not one to let herself sit idly by and grow rusty in the slightest if she was capable of a bit of training

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[but_why_u_mad]

[If he could remember, Mads would recall that he had experienced this kind of pain before. And it was much more severe the first time around, if that was possible. But as it was, he was curled tightly, hands clutching desperately at wads of his curly hair. The pain was sharp, made him sensitive to lights and sounds, so the door opening makes him cringe.

The words to greet his guest will not come. He knows what he wants to say, but how to say it is lost in the muddle of voices from everyone in the Keep.

With a bit of effort, he opens his eyes, slowly apprehensively and looks in Talia's direction. Hello...?]

You have the greatest PB for Mads. Cuuutie!

[thequeensown]

[Talia's gaze falls on the man and though there is the faintest tic of familiarity, she cannot place it. She sucks in a sharp breath as he seems incapable of even greeting her, her brows furrowing sharply in reaction.]

By the Gods ..

[She hisses out the words on the exhale, opening her shields and extending them over Mads' balled up form. He should feel an almost instantaneous relief as the pain all but shuts off immediately as her shields become his own and block the pain away. Her words are soft as she accompanies them with the cooling presence of her own mind, gently brushing at the pained sections of his own mind.]

Be at ease, friend .. I have you now .. I'll carry your shields until you can.

[She has reached his side now, a hand coming to rest gently upon his shoulder. She had no way of knowing if this man had always been like this or if something else had happened to cause this.]

The PB is part of the reason I love Mads so much.

[but_why_u_mad]

[The relief, the respite is so welcomed that it takes an incredible amount of composure to keep from launching himself at Talia and hugging her tightly. His hands lower and the pain that had once twisted his features was gone in an instant. It was as if the pain had never been there at all.

His gratitude literally cannot be expressed with words. Even though he is no longer plagued with the thoughts of others, how to speak is still lost to him. Fortunately, however, he does know how to write! So he motions for her to wait a moment while he finds the journal and quill.

The language he writes is probably unfamiliar to Talia, but thank Deior for the fancy language translation.]

Thank you. So much.

All the agreement, ever! :D

[thequeensown]

[Talia takes up the burden of shielding Mads without a second thought to her own safety or abilities. Doing such certainly put her at risk, should he prove to be doing this to gain access to her mind, but luckily that was not the case just now.

She didn't even need to be shielding him herself to pick up on his instantaneous and plentiful gratitude. She brushes her mind gently against the source of his headache, smiling softly at him as she does so and eases the ache from the inside out.

He seems unable to speak just now, but she follows his motions as he moves to claim the journal near him. Her eyes moves over the page, not recognizing the initial scroll, but understanding it as it translates.

She smiles then, raising her eyes to meet his and shakes her head.]

No thanks are needed .. the aide is my pleasure to give .. Tell me .. do you know what happened to cause you such distress?

<3!

[but_why_u_mad]

[Talia is safe from that. Mads is unable to control his ability at this point. And that's not what bothers him. The fact that he has it at all is what makes his skin crawl. Talia can probably feel it, the utter disgust licking at his senses. He doesn't know. Maybe she does. His shields are nonexistent, aside from what she herself is providing for him.]

I...cannot remember. It...feels like a dream.

[thequeensown]

[Well, she's safe for now and that's what matters, as he'll be under his own shields before long and she'll be onto you by then, mister!

As he writes back his reply she cannot help but pick up on the disgust roiling through his mind, although she is unable to pinpoint the exact cause of the emotion. She soothes her thoughts across the emotions, easing them as best Mads will allow her.

Perhaps as his memories return there will be some reason behind the emotions, but for now, there seems to be nothing connected to them.

She frowns slightly, thinking to those that died during the epidemic, but that this one would have returned a long time before he had if he'd died then.]

Don't strain yourself .. language and memories will return in a short time, though they might be a bit jumbled until then. I will happily assist you in any way I can until then, and even after, should you require it.

[but_why_u_mad]

I remember language. Just not how to say it.

[This was frustrating, being unable to vocalize it. When she mentions memories, its as if it triggers a flash of them. Brief and hard to pin down exactly. There's a woman associated with resentment...and mom.]

Thank you again.

[thequeensown]

[Talia nods in response to that, offering a gentle smile.]

It will come, have no fear ..

[She does not miss the shift in his thoughts and emotions, her own brows knitting together at the flashes of anger and resentment and the feelings that seem to indicate 'mother' and the emotions tied to it.

Distracted, it takes her a moment before she shakes her head.]

No thanks are needed, truly .. I do what I can for those that are in need.

[but_why_u_mad]

[Oh Talia, that is not the worst of it. There are also some pretty terrible images associated with that woman. And where his name came from. Do you see it? Pretty gruesome, if you ask me. Not to mention he feels like...no remorse. He doesn't do remorse.]

You are really too kind.

[Perhaps for your own good.

But if you keep probing, you'll see all kinds of things associated with the Facility and a bit of an obsession with a certain other Keep resident.]

[thequeensown]

[She's picking up on various flashes of memory and emotion as they rise and not a single one of them is terribly reassuring.

As a matter of fact, she's growing a bit concerned about this individual she has found and just how he happened to die; because she is becoming more and more certain that he was killed and not recently arrived. She didn't knwo everyone after all.]

Can... can I get you anything? To eat or drink, perhaps?

[Right now it's not even a matter of forcibly probing, as her shields are wrapped securely about his mind, leaving her privvy to pretty much anything he throws at her. He pick up what she was sending out, too, if not for those same shields.

The mental impression of Anna is unmistakeable and her eyes widen just a touch. Oh dear .. she thinks she knows who you might be, sir.]

[but_why_u_mad]

[Well here's one. It's a cat. A white cat. Sapphire's her name. And he loves that cat more than he does people. Isn't that kind of sad? There is no one else terribly important in his life. Maybe that's why he threw himself into his work. Gave him some kind of purpose. Or maybe its got something to do with that woman. Who knows? Mads certainly doesn't.]

No. I...

[The words trail off and he seems to be concentrating. Thinking entirely too hard. He wants the pieces of this puzzle put together now plz, so Talia can get out of his head. His gratefulness for her shields is starting to give way to wariness. He's growing agitated the longer she stays and there's little he can do to hide it from her.]

[thequeensown]

[Well, what a pretty cat she is; and, yes, that is a little sad that his bestest friend is a kitty. Have you met Anders? Cause that bro has anything for cats too, although I don't think he likes you much Mads. :( How unfortunate, right?

She feels his growing agitation and speaks softly, her mind blanketing his in an attempt at calm and reassurance.]

It's alright... I mean you no harm at all...

[Oh, she's not thinking she's in the best of places right now. She knows who you are Mada, and now she knows why you are what and who you are. What she is picking up in es no bueno. D: She goes about this a different way to try to hurry it a little bit..]

Follow my mind... See what I am doing. You should be able to duplicate it with a little focus...

[She knows he has that ability.]

[but_why_u_mad]

[Sapphy is his darling~

He looks up at her when she speaks. Something buried in his brain is telling him to lie, pretend he doesn't know what she is talking about. But if he does that, she could very well take her shields away and he can't deal with that pain again. He just can't. Besides, she was in his head. She knew full well what he was capable of.

So rather begrudgingly, he does as he is told. He's concentrating, following Talia's lead.]

[thequeensown]

[Cool story, bro. :|

She picks up on that urge to lie, her brows knitting slightly in response before her expression falls neutral. The internal struggle happening in his mind is frightening, because there is so much that he is trying to hide and in trying to do so it simply brings it to the fore of his thoughts and emotions.

The stuff about his mother. The experiments. His role in all of it. Where his name came from. Damn, son. Some crazy shit up in this here head.

However, he's learning quickly how to follow her lead and settle his shields into place and she isn't terribly surprised to feel how quickly.

The lasting result of this was Talia knowing pretty much EVERYTHING that Mads ever wanted to keep secret. However, the information came at a price, because if she'd known what he was and what he was capable of, she'd never have offered him her shields or the open proof of her own abilities.]

[but_why_u_mad]

[You needn't worry your pretty little red head, Talia. Mads isn't interested in you or your powers, as he's certainly more preoccupied with getting revenge on a certain shifter. But that's for later. When he's done being confused and when he can block people out of his brain.

Seriously, nobody should be in there.

Confident that he is able to hold his own shields now, he reaches for the journal again and scrawls quickly across the page.]

I believe I can manage from here.

[thequeensown]

[Talia is already pulling back her shields as she feels his fall securely into place, although weaker then they might be when he fully recovers.

It's too late though, in a sense. She's seen in his head the darkest of secrets he's kept from others and she KNOWS him better than anyone else here at the keep.

Lucky her.]

I think you can as well... you are a quick learner.

[She tries to keep the matter light, but Mads should know (or will) exactly what she was able to pick up from him.]

Do you wish for me to escort you around the Keep to regain your bearings, or will you be alright?

[Ever the courteous Herald, even with a psycho.]