four | video
[The feed opens to show Vriska in her apartment, and it looks like she’s brought a guest! A finfaced hipster guest. That’s right, Vriska and Eridan are willingly inhabiting the same space. In fact, one could even say the two of them are in...cahoots. Cahoooooooots.
This can’t end well.]
(blue = Vriska, purple = Eridan)
Okay, time for a break from your regularly scheduled problems and angst-fests, because I -- [casts a quick look over at Eridan, as if she’d forgotten this wasn’t all about her] -- we have some very important news. So watch closely, everyone! Or smell, or lick your communicators. You know. If that’s your thing. Not that I’m talking to anyone in particular. [The most nonchalant of hairflips.]
That's right, pay real close attention, 'cause what we're talkin' about is 100% legit and way better than goin' on about a few dumbass fuckin' human kids nobody gives two shits about. That's right, we're talkin' about something truer and more veritable than any kinda fake magicy or fairy-y bullshit. [Oh, Eridan sounds so incredibly smug about this.]
Hah. If you thought that experimentation stuff was bad, then fasten your Earth safety harnesses, because you ain’t seen nothing yet.
That's right, we're talkin' about the revival of a kismesis more pitchblack than the inky side of a squid. I mean, sure, it's flatterin' that maybe a fake fuckin' wizardly seer or two might go thinkin' they actually can rouse any upstandin’ level of hostility, or maybe some nitwit fictitious fairy got some kiddy-grade spite now and then. But this is serious shit now. Frankly I doubt any one else got it in 'em for this level of genuine nonfake relationshipness.
Yeah! Soooooooo sorry to any lame neophyte justice-murderers who might have had their sights set on me. We might have had something really awful together, if you hadn’t wasted time on your playing-coy bullshit...but nope! Too late. You lost out to the most repulsive, hideous guy in paradox space. [To drive the point home, she throws an arm around Eridan’s shoulders; it looks less like a warm embrace and more like she’s trying to put him in a chokehold.]
[Which Eridan is very into thank you, although as he in turn wraps his arm around her waist he digs his nails into her side, looking supremely self-satisfied.] So if you see any kinda blowin' shit up or anything of the sort don't pay no nevermind to it, on account of it bein' nothin' but a serenadin' accompaniment to the bitterest fuckin' rivalry that ever existed in centuries of nemesises.
[And for a brief second, Vriska’s face practically screams “I really don’t want to be here”, because oh God he’s getting handsy. But it’s not long before she’s gazing back at Eridan oh-so-smugly, as though she’s actually proud to be with him right now. Gotta stay in-character.]
Hide your wigglers, everyone, because Mindfang and Dualscar are back together and worse than ever. So don't be alarmed if the weather-predicting human female is wrong tomorrow. If I had to take a lucky guess -- and my lucky guesses are always right -- I'd say keep your umbrellas close, because there's going to be a sudden downpour of purple blood in the very near future. [Vriska tightens her hold around him, and (with no small amount of effort) gives him her most alluring eightfold wink.]
[Eridan narrows his eyes and sneers right back at Vriska.] In your fuckin’ dreams, Mindfang. We’ll see who’s gettin’ the upper hand. [and turns back to the video] So excuse us, we got some REAL magic to make here. Well okay not actual magic but I figure you get the point at what I'm sayin'.
[He flips off the video but not before a there’s a flash of him leaning over, clearly aiming for a toothy hatesmooch.]
This can’t end well.]
(blue = Vriska, purple = Eridan)
Okay, time for a break from your regularly scheduled problems and angst-fests, because I -- [casts a quick look over at Eridan, as if she’d forgotten this wasn’t all about her] -- we have some very important news. So watch closely, everyone! Or smell, or lick your communicators. You know. If that’s your thing. Not that I’m talking to anyone in particular. [The most nonchalant of hairflips.]
That's right, pay real close attention, 'cause what we're talkin' about is 100% legit and way better than goin' on about a few dumbass fuckin' human kids nobody gives two shits about. That's right, we're talkin' about something truer and more veritable than any kinda fake magicy or fairy-y bullshit. [Oh, Eridan sounds so incredibly smug about this.]
Hah. If you thought that experimentation stuff was bad, then fasten your Earth safety harnesses, because you ain’t seen nothing yet.
That's right, we're talkin' about the revival of a kismesis more pitchblack than the inky side of a squid. I mean, sure, it's flatterin' that maybe a fake fuckin' wizardly seer or two might go thinkin' they actually can rouse any upstandin’ level of hostility, or maybe some nitwit fictitious fairy got some kiddy-grade spite now and then. But this is serious shit now. Frankly I doubt any one else got it in 'em for this level of genuine nonfake relationshipness.
Yeah! Soooooooo sorry to any lame neophyte justice-murderers who might have had their sights set on me. We might have had something really awful together, if you hadn’t wasted time on your playing-coy bullshit...but nope! Too late. You lost out to the most repulsive, hideous guy in paradox space. [To drive the point home, she throws an arm around Eridan’s shoulders; it looks less like a warm embrace and more like she’s trying to put him in a chokehold.]
[Which Eridan is very into thank you, although as he in turn wraps his arm around her waist he digs his nails into her side, looking supremely self-satisfied.] So if you see any kinda blowin' shit up or anything of the sort don't pay no nevermind to it, on account of it bein' nothin' but a serenadin' accompaniment to the bitterest fuckin' rivalry that ever existed in centuries of nemesises.
[And for a brief second, Vriska’s face practically screams “I really don’t want to be here”, because oh God he’s getting handsy. But it’s not long before she’s gazing back at Eridan oh-so-smugly, as though she’s actually proud to be with him right now. Gotta stay in-character.]
Hide your wigglers, everyone, because Mindfang and Dualscar are back together and worse than ever. So don't be alarmed if the weather-predicting human female is wrong tomorrow. If I had to take a lucky guess -- and my lucky guesses are always right -- I'd say keep your umbrellas close, because there's going to be a sudden downpour of purple blood in the very near future. [Vriska tightens her hold around him, and (with no small amount of effort) gives him her most alluring eightfold wink.]
[Eridan narrows his eyes and sneers right back at Vriska.] In your fuckin’ dreams, Mindfang. We’ll see who’s gettin’ the upper hand. [and turns back to the video] So excuse us, we got some REAL magic to make here. Well okay not actual magic but I figure you get the point at what I'm sayin'.
[He flips off the video but not before a there’s a flash of him leaning over, clearly aiming for a toothy hatesmooch.]