[video] ♎ 001
[ The faint sound of breathing can be heard from a slight distance although the image isn't focused on anything in particular in the room. There is some shuffling before the speaker is finally the focus. ]
Ah, hello?
We are new here.
[ There is a slight pause in the speech. A weak laugh. The young woman breathes in deeply.]
I am new here.
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Ah, hello?
We are new here.
[ There is a slight pause in the speech. A weak laugh. The young woman breathes in deeply.]
I am new here.
Sort of. All ( Read more... )
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No.
Karkat? Is that you?
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[This is when she laughs.]
You must look so tiny and cute! Hah.
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[Hold on, let her do the maths.]
I'm eleven something sweeps. Happy?
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Oh boy, when Karkat sees you, this is going to be priceless!
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[And not wearing a hoodie.]
...Okay really the line is so fucking drawn at this point. Drawn crossed and left in the fucking dust why is everybody fucking tiny and why is there a tiny me on that phone.
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[STARES]
What the fuck, why is - fuck, I don't actually know why I'm surprised any more. This is such bullshit. What are you, like thirteen sweeps? How are you even still alive??
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Thirteen whats? And what do you mean ho-- being a cop isn't that fucking dangerous if you aren't a goddamn retard. Which clearly you are. I am. Tiny me. Was I really that fucking retarded when I was your size? [Don't mind him, he is adoring the concept of being taller than himself. Yes, he is that pathetic.]
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What the fuck is a cop? You mean like an earth human authority enforcer? Wow, what the fuck. I officially do not want to know anything about whatever screwed up alternate timeline you come from. I am one hundred fucking per cent content in my ignorance.
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Earth human authority enf-- wait okay hold the fuck on a second. Are you seriously telling me you're an alien. Or think you're-- you know I think I remember thinking that at some point when I was too stupid to think. I mean enough fucking people think Alternians are aliens already-- but really? Really.
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Wow.
Fuck.
I -
Okay, it's official, I give up. I quit everything forever. Just when I think nothing here could possibly be worse than the shit that's already happened, I get this. Fucking hell. At least you're not a human, but I guess that's probably next!
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Well technically that topic is up for a stupid fucking amount of debate, but generally speaking we're considered human, yeah.
This is probably where you tell me you're some kind of super-amazing alien God that is completely and utterly better than me and all mankind in every way, right? I think I can just hear the words cascading out of your mouth like all the other hilariously fantastical bullshit you've said in the last few minutes.
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What??
What the fuck. That doesn't even make any sense. I mean you said you're Alternian, you're a god damn troll, how does that even - fuck, no, fuck this, I don't want to know. I don't want to know! I don't want to know anything else about your shitty alternate bullshit earth timeline.
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