funny convos
convo between me and bryan:
me: hey cupcake, can you settle a bet for me? joe says youre the hottest beaver maid in town, and i say your the prettiest c-dumpster ive ever eyeball sexed, so which is it?
bryan: not now, my eggs are ovulating.
me: im gonna punch your damn ovaries up into your intestines. bitch.
bryan: stupid ho i aint even got ovaries!!
me: you do now. sorry man. enjoy your periods. period mouth.
bryan: fyi periods happen between the legs
me: and at the end of sentences. see? it just happened. you need tampaxes. grammer tampaxes. and vagina tampaxes.
bryan: i like the drip on my legs, on my pants and on yo face exclamation mark
me: i like it on my face too. its like lipstick. from the inside of a woman. fricky fresh.
convo between me, my mom, and my dog:
mom: lily (my dog), wheres your collar?
me: you know, ive been asking her that all day, and she will not give me a straight answer
lily: shut up and give me a damn cookie.
me: no, now sit your furry ass down.
convo between me and juliette:
juls: lets go ghost hunting!
me: hell no.
convo between me and her:
her: <3333
me: you know, if you turn those heart upside down, they look like old male genitals.
her:...
me: hey cupcake, can you settle a bet for me? joe says youre the hottest beaver maid in town, and i say your the prettiest c-dumpster ive ever eyeball sexed, so which is it?
bryan: not now, my eggs are ovulating.
me: im gonna punch your damn ovaries up into your intestines. bitch.
bryan: stupid ho i aint even got ovaries!!
me: you do now. sorry man. enjoy your periods. period mouth.
bryan: fyi periods happen between the legs
me: and at the end of sentences. see? it just happened. you need tampaxes. grammer tampaxes. and vagina tampaxes.
bryan: i like the drip on my legs, on my pants and on yo face exclamation mark
me: i like it on my face too. its like lipstick. from the inside of a woman. fricky fresh.
convo between me, my mom, and my dog:
mom: lily (my dog), wheres your collar?
me: you know, ive been asking her that all day, and she will not give me a straight answer
lily: shut up and give me a damn cookie.
me: no, now sit your furry ass down.
convo between me and juliette:
juls: lets go ghost hunting!
me: hell no.
convo between me and her:
her: <3333
me: you know, if you turn those heart upside down, they look like old male genitals.
her:...