(Untitled)

[theotherqpc]

my sister found Ed's journal, complete with profile about sexual interests.

she thinks we're disgusting. she thinks he's a "dirty old man."

so that makes 2 members of my family that hate him and think that he's immoral and evil...

Comments

[danthered]

But, sweetie, Ed is a dirty old man. That's one of the reasons why you love him, yeanay? :-)

You don't mention how your sister found Ed's journal. Was it because she knew about your journal? If so, how'd that happen? My sister and my mother don't know my journal exists, and I have taken the initiative to make sure the odds remain extremely slim that they ever will. I have also taken sensible precautions such that even if they should discover my journal, there will be essentially no damage.

As for your family, they shouldn't be asking questions to which they don't want answers. They don't (can't) hate Ed 'cause they don't know him; what they hate is their idea of Ed. Had you been less secretive and much more upfront and assertive with your family, you mightn't be facing quite such a familial reaction as this.

I had very good success telling my family that I would answer whatever questions they had about me, on two conditions: I reserved the right to say "That's not your business", and they had to be prepared to get honest and truthful answers to their questions. The first condition was just plain common sense. The second did a very effective job of making them think carefully to make sure they really wanted to know the information before asking the question. The result was that they asked some really good questions, and if they got disgusted by excessive information, the blame lay entirely with them and not with me.

My 2¢.

[barak]

Dan has some good advice here. My best advice would be to make no apologies for loving a dirty old man.

Also remember that family can be very notoriously overprotective. Ever since my parents died, my sister has had a tendency to treat me like I'm 13 every once a while, and I've had to draw the line and make it clear that I can appreciate the sentiment behind her behavior, but she needs to back off and let me live my own life. If it helps, both she and my best friends absolutely hated two of my boyfriends. I think part of growing up in a relationship involves learning to stick with who is important to you even everyone around you disapproves - even vocally.

Tell your sister that you would appreciate if she didn't shoot off her mouth if she is going to be so judgemental. If its your life- you need to live it because she can't possibly agree with every choice you make or people you date and so on.

[theotherqpc]

she found his journal thru google. when she asked for his name, i suspected that's what she'd do, so i asked Ed to change his profile's name. she found him before google updated.

[danthered]

A truthful and considerably more prudent response to "What's his name" might've been "Ed."

[theotherqpc]

that response doesn't work when she specifically asks for first and last name.

unfortunately, i didn't think of the alternate spelling of "Sienkiewicz" soon enough.

[danthered]

Sure it does. "Ed." Did she point a gun at your head or somethin'? Where's it written you have to go "How high?" when your sister says "Jump!"?

[rock_bear]

i think we ought to go in and rescue Jeff and take him to a safe house before his family do any more damage

here here

[mojobear]

another vote here for the safe house- and comming from this household- that counts as 3! You're always welcome to come hise out in Su-BEAR-ia - and we have a great hub airport here.